| Review by Jim |
| Plot: While there's an imminent attack on Zion from the Sentinels, Neo finds himself having to battle a crazed Agent Smith bent on destroying the Matrix as well as the real world. Will Zion be saved? Will everything finally be explained? Will agent Smith get his own movie? Will Wylde Stallions rule once again?! Tune in to see. Review: Matrix: Reloaded was a huge disappointment to me. I haven't seen such an ill-conceived sequel since C.H.U.D. II: Bud the Chud. Though, Bud the Chud had a kick ass theme song. So needless to say I didn't expect much out of Revolutions. This time I was actually proven wrong, though, not by that large of a margin. How do I describe Revolutions in one word? Hilarious, that's how! This movie (unintentionally, I hope) had my sides splitting. Ladies and gentlemen, we have a so-bad-it's-good movie on our hands. For the most part, I agree with my brother. All those drawn-out conversations and plot devices are chucked out the window. Hell, we don't even get to see the albino twins in this movie. And to think they were actually starting to grow on me. Which renders Reloaded completely pointless, and what can I say? Reloaded should be forgotten as soon as possible. The one problem here is that we trade long-winded lectures in for corny sentimental scenes. Whenever someone went into a tear-jerker speech with epic orchestrated music playing, how can I not laugh my ass off? In fact, there are a ton of these tear-jerker moments, most of which I couldn't care less about. As mentioned in my brother's review, Trinity's death sequence is so humorous and I did say that out loud. She's impaled on a bunch of metal bars and she goes into a lengthy, emotional talk with Neo. "I only have a few minutes left...but before I die, let me read you a 100-page thesis I wrote in college." That's the way I felt about that scene. The plot is mushy. Neo gets blinded in a fight and he can now "see" everything about the Matrix, proving my theory that once you become blind you get better at everything you do. It's better if we just forget the plot and concentrate on the action. Speaking of action, there are barely any scenes in the actual Matrix. I did enjoy the Zion fight scenes, especially with that general over-acting. But what's a Matrix movie without all those slick Matrix sequences? Sure we get a gunfight in a club, but that was just a rehash of the cop shoot-out in the first movie. The only other fight scene worth mentioning is the climax with Neo and agent Smith. The scene has a bit of kung-fu in it, but it's pretty much just Smith and Neo flying at each other, causing nuclear explosions, and getting knocked into walls DragonBall Z-style. One particularly funny moment happens when Neo gives Smith a slow-motion punch to the face and Smith gives a painful expression right out of Raging Bull. I got stitches in my side from that. As far as characters, there are thankfully not that many new faces. There was the Trainman, a grungy hobo that punches Neo in the gut. Neo, are you gonna take that shit from a hobo? Apparently so. And the Oracle is played by a different woman. To be honest, she's pretty damn good for an unknown actress. Ian Bliss plays Bane: the human counterpart of agent Smith, and I swear this guy looks just like Hugo Weaving himself. Between the voice, acting, and the way he looks, Bliss is the mirror image of Weaving. I see this guy going places after this movie, it's a shame he only gets a few minutes worth of time. There's also a little Indian girl called Sati who just plain irritated the hell out of me with her "cuter than anything in the known universe" attitude. I'm talking Care Bears cuteness to the tenth power. Link, Niobe, Ghost, and the rest of the forgettable characters that were introduced in Reloaded were just filler. Monica Bellucci seems to be brought into this movie for the sole purpose of showing off a few second's worth of cleavage, and what can I say? They are impressive. I couldn't care less about the bunch of them. Laurence Fishburne tones down the religious zeal that Morpheus had in Reloaded, and to him I say thanks. I couldn't stand another minute of that horseshit. And is it just me or does Fishburne look a bit chunkier than last time? Carrie-Ann Moss just does what she's been doing in the last two movies: giving moody expressions, making out with Neo, and partaking in the occasional fight sequence. To be honest, I'm totally indifferent to Moss' acting. Come to think of it, I'm indifferent to all the main characters except for agent Smith. Keanu Reeves sounds even more dude-ish than before. He tries so hard to look serious, but I just don't buy any of his emotional scenes. They just don't seem to care, and can you really blame them? Whether they're putting on the performance of a lifetime or just sitting around, Revolutions is still going to rake in a ton of money. However, there's an exception: Hugo Weaving. I think it's time for him to get his own movie already. Weaving just goes nuts with agent Smith and gives an over-the-top performance that I can't help but love. All the witty Smith banter is here for all you Smith fans out there and Weaving gives us a bunch of crazy facial expressions to boot. The real savior of the Matrix trilogy is Weaving. My final thoughts? Matrix: Revolutions is indeed better than Reloaded, but it doesn't even begin to compare to the original Matrix. So to hardcore Matrix fans, I say just forget about these two sequels. If you liked Reloaded, than Revolutions is worth checking out. Be warned that this movie is corny most of the time and will have you rolling in the aisles with laughter, but it's all good. I see no pressing need to see this flick in the theaters unless you really have a need to burn some cash. I really hope the Wachowski brothers end the series now since Revolutions is the best kind of Matrix sequel you can hope for. |
| Rating: ** |
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