Priya Emily-Bella Jade Lynn Bloom was born December the fifth at 5:55 AM. Her lucky number, Billy said, would be five; he was the third to hold her only after her very happy parents had the chance.

Dom laughed and rolled his eyes, “You don't call your father Pappie, you call him dad."

“That is a detail. I’ve said before I'm not concerned with details and I stand beside that now.”

“I don’t think you should name children after fruits,” Liberty mused, leaning against Dom who had his arms wrapped securely around her. “It is a lovely name. Very emmmm……” Liberty trailed off. "At least it's not patriotic."

Dom shrugged, “I like it. It's a solid name. Solid like a lobster.”

Billy looked up from the baby into the faces of his friends, “I could go for a lobster right now. Maybe they'll drip it in papaya.”

Orlando frowned from his spot beside Raya on the bed, “I’m going to take that baby away from you if you keep saying Papaya. She’s going to have a complex.”

“You can’t take her from her favorite Godfather!“ Billy hissed, looking violated.

“You could have just named her Jane and saved her lifetime humiliation,“ Elijah stated evenly.

“You're just bitter cuz you have a name people laugh at. Or is that a face? I get them confused.”

“Priya Emily-Bella Jade Lynn Bloom. That’s quite a mouthful,” Dom said, clearly to get Billy off the track he had chosen to get on. “Don’t get me wrong, it’s beautiful…but…”

Raya, who looked as immaculate as ever, maybe even more so even after three hours of pushing, screaming, reviving Orlando and squeezing his fingers into dust, said, “Bella is for Billy because we promised to name our first child after him.”

“My name’s not Bella,” Billy pointed out unnecessarily.

“No, but it would be if you were a drag queen,” Dom remarked lightly.

Billy sneered at him and handed the baby carefully back to her mother. “I’ll be going now. It is obvious the most important person in this baby’s life is not wanted.”

“Billy, don’t be ridiculous,” Raya laughed from the bed. She looked down at the teeny baby in her arms and smiled. “She even has your eyes.”

“Her eyes are blue,” Billy stated blandly. “Like yours.”

“Oh, yes, well I suppose that’s right,” Raya smiled and ran a hand over the baby’s little mound of dark curls.

Just then Liberty let out a huge thunderous yawn and collapsed against Dom, making them both sink into the chair behind him, which incidentally was occupied by Elijah.

“Oomph,” Elijah mumbled, pushing Dom up; he stumbled across the room a little in his tiredness. “I hate when that happens.”

“I guess I’d better get her into bed,” Dom said, smiling at everyone. “We’ll come back tomorrow to see the baby.” He took Liberty’s hand and began gently pulling her towards the door.

“Congratulations, you two,” she whispered, waving slightly. “She’s gorgeous.”

It was obvious to everyone when they left that, even though Liberty hadn’t slept for about 18 hours, she wouldn’t be getting much sleep until tomorrow at the earliest.

*

“I’m not too sure I like this,” Liberty muttered, plucking at her simple, yet elegant, black dress which she borrowed from Raya. This was evident, as it was much lower cut than Liberty was used to; she paired it with strappy black sandals and a nervous expression on her face. It was three days after Priya’s birth and Orlando and Raya were noticeably absent from the night’s festivities.

Dom laughed, “What don’t you like about it?”

“All the people looking at me,” she responded, watching as Dom waved to rather overzealous fan who had painted, “MARRY ME DOM” on her face in black war paint. “And your adoring fans who would probably murder me if they got the chance.”

“No, they’re not homicidal,” Dom assured her, pulling her closer to him just the same. “They just love me, is all. I am the sexiest man alive, you know.”

“I wasn’t aware,” she quipped lightly, clinging to his arm. “Did People magazine put you on their list?”

Dom looked at her sourly, “As it happens, no. But once they’re realized their mistake, they’ll replace that Brad Pitt fellow with me.”

“Brad Pitt?” Liberty gawked, laughing slightly. “You’re sexier than Brad Pitt?”

“Are you saying I’m not?”

“Of course not, it’s just, that, well…BILLY!” Dom did an about face and saw Billy strutting up to them with Elizabeth on his arm. She had returned home to greet her niece properly, and had agreed to be Billy’s date to the first premiere of the circuit.

Dom adjusted his simple white shirt and pulled a lollipop from his pocket; he unwrapped it and plucked it into his mouth, sucking contentedly.

“God, you know what that does to me,” Liberty whispered, grinning.

“Oh, I am well aware, love,” he winked at her and then turned business like and began answering reporter’s questions.

“Dom, we’re wanted for cast photos before we go inside,” Billy said, smiling randomly at people. “Lizzie, dear, will you go with Liberty inside?”

Elizabeth nodded and the two girls took off together after Dom had kissed Liberty quite securely on the mouth, which prompted many screaming girls in the audience to stop moving and gape inaudibly.

“So, how is little Papaya doing?” Liberty asked as she and Elizabeth found their place cards. Liberty’s said, “Dom #2” while Billy’s said, “Billy’s Bitch” which was probably Billy’s idea, or Peter’s idea of a joke. Either way, Elizabeth wasn’t exactly pleased.

“She’s fine, she cries a lot, though. I’ve taken to wearing earplugs. Raya, of course, just adores her and Orlando is ever the overprotective father.”

Liberty laughed, “Yes, I gathered that when he was at the hospital shooting questions to the nurses about the conditions of the nursery. He’s taken a large leaf out of Sean’s book. Speaking of which, I wonder where Christine is.”

“There she is now,” Elizabeth said, sitting in her seat after putting the card beneath the chair; Liberty looked to see Christine making her way towards them, a broad grin on her faces.

“Well, you won’t believe what I overheard Dom saying.”

Liberty rose an eyebrow as Christine settled into her seat (marked ‘Sean’s wife’). “I can’t imagine.”

“Some dreadful woman asked him if he was involved with anyone.” Christine leaned towards Liberty inconspicuously; she was sitting a good four seats over from them, but her voice carried in the nearly empty room. “He said, ‘As a matter of fact, I’m quite in love at the moment. You could call it enamored, but I simply adore her.’ Then they started talking about filming and I tuned it out.” She waited expectantly for Liberty’s reaction.

“Hmmm,” Liberty said. “I didn’t realize we were announcing our relationship to the masses yet.”

“Apparently you are,” Christine laughed. “Sean’s announced the birth of Orlando’s child to anyone who will listen.”

Liberty nodded, “I’m not shocked.”

“So do you think Dom will propose soon and you’ll have your own little Priya running around?”

This time, Liberty laughed out loud, “Highly doubtful.”

“Why?”

“Because I’ve told him I’m not ready for that big a step. Marriage. And CERTAINLY not kids. I’m only twenty.”

“You’ll be twenty one soon,” Christine reminded her. “And Raya’s twenty four.”

“Yes, a good three years older. And more prepared. And grown-up.”

“I think you’d make a lovely mother,” Elizabeth commented, looking interestedly as a couple sat down in front of them; they looked familiar, but Liberty couldn’t place them.

“Well, thanks, but I don’t even know if I want kids. Dom wants a litter.” Christine laughed, but Liberty was clearly not joking. “But, if I were going to have kids, I’d want it to be with him.”

“That’s promising at least,” Christine replied.

“How long before the boys get in here?” Elizabeth asked casually.

Christine sighed, “Few more probing questions and then they’ll be done.”

Liberty gasped and leaned forward, out of her seat and into the one in front of her. “Hayden?”

The man in front of her turned his head round and smiled at her, “Liberty, hello!”

“How are you?” she asked, grinning. “It’s been, hmmm. A year. I’m surprised we remembered each other.”

“Well, any friend of Sean’s,” Hayden replied, laughing. “You remember Nat?” Natalie turned around them, smiling at her.

“The Patriarch!” Natalie exclaimed. “Hi!” Liberty nodded and laughed and said a cheery hello. “So, we heard from a good source that you and Mr. Monaghan are engaged.”

“We’re not,” Liberty laughed.

“Yet,” Christine put in. Liberty rolled her eyes, but was smiling hugely just the same.

“Ah, and here he comes now. I better turn around in my seat, incase he’s the jealous type.” Hayden winked and then turned around, chatting animatedly with Natalie. Dom plonked down into the seat beside Liberty and put an arm around her shoulders, she snuggled into him.

“It’s a mad house out there. The others haven’t made it out alive yet. I have high hopes, though. Billy trod on someone’s foot. He can hold his own.”

*

“God, that was good,” Liberty remarked as she and Dom entered the dark flat; Dom felt around the wall for the light switch and flicked it on, drenching them in artificial light. Liberty pulled her jacket off and tossed it onto a kitchen chair, stretching.

“It was rather amazing, wasn’t it,” Dom smirked, moving towards her.

“Don’t even, Monaghan,” Liberty warned. “We’ve got a plane to catch tomorrow so we can go to your next big premiere.”

“Where are we going?” Dom asked, yawning and stepping away from her, as to not arouse trouble. “Oh, Australia.”

“Yes, it’s so sad we can only be there for one night.”

Dom shrugged, “Nah. We can go back some other time.” He pulled his jacket off and deposited it into the coat closet. “Is Orly coming, do you think?”

“I believe so, but I’m not certain. I guess we’ll find out tomorrow. Elijah, Billy and Sean are all going. And Liv I think, and Viggo and Henry. And Ian, who I actually haven’t seen yet.”

“He’s a laugh, you’ll like him.”

Liberty nodded, covering up a yawn. “I’m going to bed. I’m exhausted.”

“Can’t we just fool around for a bit before? Who knows when we’ll get a chance next.”

“Probably on the plane,” Liberty stated, tossing her shoes off.

“OOOOOH, can I be part of that mile high club thing that Orlando’s always boasting about?”

Liberty shrugged, “Sure. Why not.”

***

“AHHHHHHHHHH!” Billy shrieked, falling back against the other bathroom door and fanning his face. “MY EYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEES!”

Elijah rushed up to him, being the closest in the vicinity, having been waiting in line to get into the bathrooms, “What the hell is going on? What’s the matter?”

“Liberty. Dom. Compromising position. Am going to die.” Billy slumped against Elijah in what seemed to be a faint; Elijah, instead of holding him up, allowed him to drop to the ground in a heap. “HEY!” Billy called from the floor. “You were supposed to throw water on me or place smelling salts under my nose! You can’t just DROP me!”

“I can and I did. Now if you’ll excuse me, I want to get as far away from here as possible.” Elijah put his nose into the air and made the way back to his seat.

“It’s a natural part of life,” Raya was saying, swinging a sleeping Priya in her arms. “It’s how little Priya came to be.” The Blooms were sitting closest to the bathrooms and had seen the entire scene.

“Oh, God,” Billy moaned, putting a hand to his head. “I don’t even want to go there.”

“How’d you think she came?” Orlando asked, looking amused. “By stork?”

“I’d hoped so, yes. I had a vivid picture in my mind of the large beautiful bird looming round the hospital looking for you with a little baby in a bundle and a name tag that said BLOOM on it. You’ve crushed my dreams, OB. I can never look at you the same again.”

“Stop being so dramatic,” Viggo laughed. “Honestly. You’d think you were the elf and not him.” He jabbed a thumb at Orlando, who scowled.

“I take offense to that,” Orlando muttered, making a show of wrapping Priya up tighter in her blanket and depositing her in the bassinette that resided on the floor in front of them. They were, of course, flying in style in a private jet; it held most of the LOTR cast and some of the crew. It was essential to the premiere circuit and promotional tour that they be able to leave exactly when they needed to.

“You would,” Viggo shot back, looking over Henry’s shoulder at the magazine he was flipping through. “What’s that you’ve got?”

“It’s a magazine,” Henry answered, smirking.

“Your son is just like you, Vig,” Orlando said, chuckling in an odd sort of way. Raya raised an eyebrow, clearly not wanting a fight to wake the baby.

Viggo took the magazine from Henry, who reached into his backpack to retrieve a gameboy; soon the quiet plane was filled with the sounds of firing missiles and guys being killed. Billy watched from the seat behind him, cheering him on. “This is interesting,” Viggo remarked after a few minutes. “Did anyone know Dom did an interview for The Enquirer?”

“No,” Raya replied, leaning over the aisle to get a good look. There was a two page spread plastered with photos of Dom and Liberty at premieres, Sean and Christine, Raya and Orlando and even a little insert of Priya which had obviously been taken when Raya had gone shopping just three days prior. “That’s an article about the significant others?”

“It says so, yes,” Viggo remarked, sounding odd. “There’s only a little mention of your wedding to Orlando, and Sean and Christine’s marriage. It’s mostly about Dom and Liberty’s struggles to stay afloat in a world where Hollywood wants to break everyone apart. My god, there’s a quote from Anaka. How did this come about?”

He allowed Raya to take it from him, where she scanned it quickly. “At the wedding, it says. There were reporters at the wedding?”

“Only the ones we’re related to,” Orlando joked.

“This isn’t funny, Orlando,” Raya replied, sounding scandalized. “It’s prying into Liberty and Dom’s love life.”

“Erm, didn’t you know that this happens all the time?” Orlando questioned, his face contorted in a frown.

“Yes, but not to them.”

“It was bound to eventually.”

“Oh my,” Raya gasped, flipping the magazine together and peering at the article critically. “It says, ‘Dominic Monaghan, ever the bachelor, seems keen to stay that way. Inside sources say he’s trying to break up his relationship with longtime love, Liberty Crane, whom he met in Los Angeles shortly after Lord of the Rings began filming. They have been seen around town together, but an unidentified source claims that Monaghan, 27, is always looking for an out. Crane, 20, was brought down to tears not long ago when he reportedly cheated on her with an anonymous girl.’ I can’t read anymore. This is complete rubbish! They’re reporting on their life!”

“Our wedding was in these magazines,” Orlando said carefully, picking up the magazine from Raya’s lap and examining it.

“That wasn’t dredging up things that ought not be commented upon,” Raya said shortly. “Bloody Anaka. I’ll ring her neck---Liberty!” Liberty had just emerged from the bathroom, fixing her hair and blushing. Raya hastily stuffed the magazine behind Orlando’s back; he tried to look inconspicuous, but was being overly conspicuous as a result.

“What?” Liberty asked slowly, standing in front of them all. She could see the entire plane from where she stood; Elijah was listening to headphones, apparently asleep, Henry and Billy were talking about games, Liv, Sean and Christine were all sleeping and the remainder of the occupants were staring at her.

Orlando coughed and pulled the magazine out from behind him. “You’ve apparently thrown numerous shoes at ‘Monaghan’ and put him to tears. Likewise, he’s caused you great emotional pain by cheating on you with many floozies and you’re both close to rehab.”

“Don’t sugarcoat it, will you,” Viggo muttered out of the corner of his mouth; Orlando shrugged helplessly. Liberty flipped through the magazine idly, scanning the article with a stoic expression on her face.

“This is hilarious,” Liberty said eventually, looking at them all. Raya was biting her bottom lip in true Liberty fashion while bouncing her feet up and down; Orlando and Viggo had fake smiles plastered on their faces and Billy had finally immersed himself in more than just Henry’s gameboy.

“How is it hilarious?” Raya ventured.

“Well, this bit is, ‘Liberty Crane, a provocative socialite from Michigan, won Monaghan’s affections after draping herself over him every time the chance arose. Friends say he is completely smitten with her and has asked her to marry him several times, but she has always shot him down. There are reports that she has her eyes on another hobbit. One Billy Boyd, who plays Pippin in the LOTR trilogy’. HA. That’s great stuff because earlier on they say that he wants an out. How can he be completely smitten AND want an out at the same time?” She shrugged and tossed the magazine into Raya’s lap. Billy grabbed at it and began reading.

“Libs, it said you have your eye on Billy,” Dom said, startling them all because they hadn’t realized he’d emerged from the bathroom.

“I don’t,” Liberty laughed, then glanced at Billy, who wasn’t listening. “I mean, I love Billy. But only as a friendly brother type. I swear.”

Dom kissed her, “I was only joking, love.”

“Oh.”

Billy looked up, laughing, “Did you see that it says Liberty’s a scarlet woman wanting to date all of the Fellowship? It calls her a barracuda. God, that’s brilliant, isn’t it.”

“Not so much, no,” Liberty muttered. “I didn’t see that part.”

“That’s because it’s not there,” Raya said, shooting Billy a look.

“It does say something about her wanting to date us all, even married Sean,” Orlando said. “It said, Billy let me have that.” He took the magazine and scanned it, finding the passage he wanted. “It says, ‘There have been many a fight where newlywed Orlando Bloom, Legolas, was concerned. His wife, Raya Scott-Spencer-Bloom of Spencer European Insurance, and Crane have ‘had words’ more than once says a close friend of Spencer-Bloom’s.’ It goes on to say, ‘And Crane has set her hooks in Sean Astin, who plays Samwise Gamgee, which has set his wife into hysterics that can only be calmed down by overuse of a new over the counter drug that treats extreme depression.’ That’s wonderful as there is no such thing.”

“OH OH!” Orlando continued, laughing a little; Dom slipped his arm around Liberty’s waist and she sighed, leaning her head on his shoulder. “It says you’re after Andy too! OY! ANDY!” Andy wasn’t actually on the flight, something Billy told Orlando and caused Orlando to blush and cough oddly. “Oh, and Viggo. HA HA HA HA! ‘20 years her senior, Crane has also set her sights on Viggo Mortensen, 40, who plays Aragorn.’ That’s ridiculous.” He tossed the magazine aside and looked up at Liberty, who was biting her bottom lip and looking around apprehensively. “Don’t think on it, Libs, it’s rubbish.”

“They’ve made me out to be some sort of senile whore!” She shook her head. “Bastards.”

Dom hugged her, “That’s right, you let ‘em have it.”

“How much truth was actually in that article?” Viggo asked rhetorically. “Only the part where it said you were dating. That’s all. Don’t worry about it.”

Liberty nodded and she and Dom went back to their seats, where she sighed and closed her eyes, wondering vaguely what she had gotten herself into.

“They suck,” she muttered after a few minutes of silence.

“They do, yes,” Dom agreed, pulling her closer to him. “But it doesn’t matter. ‘Cause they have no idea.”

“What do you mean?” she asked, looking up at him.

“They have no idea about the wrath of the hobbits. Oh, and they will get it. We’ll smote them, Libs. We’ll smote them GOOD.”