Rachel Dand; possibly the funniest girl that ever lived. The girl who would do anything for a laugh - and often comes out with what are now refered to as Rachisms - stupid things to say at the oddest times! Here is a selection of the best.
I wanna be a REAL boy!
Basic story: Sitting in General Studies, Rach and others are talking about Pinoccio. Once the room goes quiet, Rach comes out with 'I wanna be a REAL boy' in high pitched Pinnoccio style voice
I reckon I could fit a whole egg in my mouth
Again in General Studies, talking about the phrase 'You can't teach your Grandma to suck eggs,' 10 minutes later on, again once quiet, Rachel says: I reckon I could fit a whole egg in my mouth.
Don't worry Dave, there's room in here for both of us!
Sitting in the back of Danny's car with my now boyfriend, Rachel decides to try her luck at sexual innuendo. Once Dave says there isn't room under the blanket for both of them, Rachel proceeds to insist that there's enough room for both of them if they snuggle up. Nice one Rach, go on my luv!
I want to break free
Shelley's party, May 2003, Rachel does a nice Freddy Mercury impression for the camcorder, pretending she's in the 'I want to break free' video with a hoover.
I reckon I like big butts and I cannot lie...
Again, same party, we have camcorder proof of Rachel swinging her arse to the wonderful 'Baby got Back' song. I like big BUTTS and I cannot lie, all you other brothers can't deny....
Duck Billed Platypus
The picture at the top of this page is of Rachel's Duck Billed Platypus impression. We dont know where it came from, or why. All we know is that when this certain platypus is dancing around Broadway, its the funniest thing in the world.
Head Butting like a chicken
Same party of Shelley's again caught on camera, is Rachel's impression of head butting. Kinda like a chicken pecking.
Why are your curtains held together with a billdog clip?
Only funny when you've had nothing to eat all day then had a pitcher of Long Island Iced tea. Rachel's inquisitive mind was asking why exactly the curtains in my kitchen were held together by a bulldog clip. We still dont know the answer.
I'm the stud of the group. Just look at that package!
In Torquay, people had the wonderful idea of dressing up as men. We all had catchphrases. Ratch managed to fit three pairs of socks down her trousers. Hence her catchphrase!
Oops I've filled me pouch!
Again, on the night we dressed up as men. Ratch we think looks a bit like a hamster in her 'man' costume. The innuendo speaks for itself
