Wette Hennes

Welcome to the best guild on the Disc. Well, we call it a guild, but we're more like a coven or a sisterhood than any sort of organized Guild. The Hags and Hens of the Witches are some of the nicest (well, when they're so inclined at least) and most interesting ladies you'll ever meet.

It has now been quite some time since I was a wee wette henne myself, and a lot has changed since then. But I've come up with a few pointers for a new witch that you might find helpful anyhow.

To join the Guild, you'll need to find Granny Weatherwax, the most powerful witch on the Disc. She lives in Bad Ass, near Lancre Town but up in the Ramtops a ways. Tell her respecfully that you'd like to become a witch (remember, it's a girls-only profession, but she'll be happy to help you if you're deficient in that area), and she'll tell you if you've got what it takes to become a Witch. Then, if she approves of you, you'll be a Witch.

If you don't want to try your hand at hiking all the way to the Ramtops from wherever you've gotten to when you decide to become a witch, you have several options. You can find Gennie Applebee in Ankh-Morpork, by Holofernes and Willow. Remember that witches, as a rule, don't use the front door if they can help it. She'll give you a taliswoman that is the fastest way to get to Bad Ass (and you can and should get another one from her each time you use it to go back to AM, until you're good enough with a broom that you don't need it anymore), or Ogg-san will help you in Bes Palargic.

Once you're a witch, and you've got a pointy hat (try getting the Demon-claw coathook to drop you one), you'll probably want to advance some skills so you can learn some spells and commands and become, well, a proper witch. You want to do Magic, don't you? The first thing to do is to "advance magic", then. This will take money and experience points (xp), since the fastest and simplest way is to advance with Granny in the room. Granny has been known to fade, so look closely at the room descriptions if you cannot find her in her cottage. You simply might not be seeing her, though she's there.

Commands and other things, such as various squint methods, can be learned either automagically when you reach the appropriate skill levels--a sudden revelation--or from various witches around the Disc. The first witch to go to for help is always good old Nanny Ogg, who hangs out around Granny's cottage most of the time. She can tell you a thing or two, including what spells Granny knows. Always remember to be polite to other witches. Granny herself will teach you most spells, if you ask her nicely.

Look around Granny's house. Just about everything there, you are welcome to use as you see fit. There is a chest where more experienced witches often leave a thing or two they suspect would be useful for a new witch; please check it, if you're feeling nekkid or unarmed for some reason.

Money and Experience points aren't the easiest things for a Wette Henne to get. You get experience points with everything you do, though; this might be a good time to explore the Disc a bit. You'll need Lancre currency, to advance with Granny--she doesn't hold with traveling much, so all that foriegn money is worthless to her. And while she accepts goods and clothes from most of Bad Ass, she'll expect you to pull your weight a little more and pony up the cash. You can sell things you find while searching (and the more stuff you do, the more XP you earn!) at any general store. To easily transfer funds from Ankh-Morpork to Lancre, set up an account with the Farmer's Cooperative and put your money into it at the AM branch, then fly on over to the Lancre branch or the Ohulan-Cutash branch and get your crowns there. There are some jobs that will pay on the Disc, if you look hard enough. One trick I used a few times was to borrow some of Granny's old things and take them to a general store; since she's always getting a new bag of old clothes or somesuch, she never complained. As a last resort, ask another witch for a loan; moaning that you're only a shilling short after attempting to advance often results in another witch slipping you a little something, asked for or not. I'd advise against using this method too often; it's quite a blow to your pride, and a clever witch should have little trouble finding coins on the Disc.

In general, fighting will give you the best xp return for your time. It is, however, dangerous, because especially as a young witch, you're likely to die even fighting the simplest NPCs. I'm not much of a fighter, but a few hints--raise your health as quickly as you can, to give yourself more hp; remember that a broom is a weapon, too; use "consider" or "con" on a potential enemy to see if they will be too difficult to kill.

You also get xp simply for being on the Disc and wandering around. Commands and spells will give you xp as well, and they will also let you tm various skills. Getting a tm means that you have advanced a level in one skill, and you do not have to pay for it. You only get these through practice, so, once you begin learning spells, use each spell as much as you can so that you will practice the skills involved. Eventually you will be able to succeed at the spell. You can use Focus Tea to help learn how you stand on being able to successfully cast each spell you know.

There are several ways to get help as a new witch. Every new player has access to the newbie command, which allows you to ask a question of specially assigned Newbie Helpers. "Who liaison" and "who newbiehelper" will give you the names of people trained to help you with any problems you may have on the Disc. "Who witch" will tell you what witches are online. You can "tell keb Can you help me, please?" and usually get help quite quickly that way.

Talker Sticks are incredibly useful for all players. Once you get it set properly to the Witches' channel, you've got a link to the people who really know the answers to your burning questions about witchcraft. Never ask about quests, as there is a rule against sharing quest information. But anything else, from "What level do I need to be to learn circle?" to "Where are the candles in Granny's?" to just plain "HELP!" can be answered via the talker. You've got a voucher for one as part of your Newbie kit; follow the directions on your voucher to get a talker. Then read up on Help Talker to figure out how to get the thing working right.

Help and Syntax are two of the most useful commands in the MUD. They'll tell you more than any single player could (with a few notable exceptions). You can even type "Help Room" if you're totally baffled as to what you can do in a room. Syntax will likewise give you advice on what you can do with a given command or verb. Anytime you have a basic question, I'd advise using Help first, then asking on the talker channels once you've read the help files on your topic.

Though regular internet shorthand tends to be avoided in the text-based environs of the Disc (it'll drive some people nuts if you use normal chat abbreviations, or, heaven forbid, emoticons), there are a number of common abbreviations that you will quickly learn. Most commonly abbreviated are place names or wizard spell names, simply because some of them are long.

Aliasing is a very useful skill for a new player. You can alias just about anything, and thereby shorten the number of characters you have to type correctly to, say, cast a spell (most of which do have long names that have to be spelled right). Read up on Help Alias for more advice on it; choose things that are easy for you to remember. You can also alias sequences of events by using ; in between each line. Some mudders share their best aliases (which are quite clever sequences of actions) but I believe you should come up with your own. However, an example of two aliases:

alias delude cast Delusions of Grandeur on $*$
alias pander look Keb's Sparkly Thing;hold keb's sparkly thing
Using the aliases above:

delude frying pan

This will result in my first casting Delusions on the frying pan, and then looking at it using the new name, and then holding it using the new name.

Another useful thing, especially for a witch, is the use of Identify. You can identify whatever bag you're carrying about as "component pouch", and then you will be able to automatically get spell components out of it when casting. This means that you won't have to carry your yarrow, frog, circle components, etc all the time--you can put them in a backpack and leave them there.

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Last updated: 12:08 Tokyo Time, Thursday, October 6th, 2005.
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