Guide to Witchy Services for Non-Witches

"People often went to a witch when they were in trouble. Sometimes it was to ask them to stop, of course."

Well, well, well, you've decided you need a bit of helping from us witches, haven't you? If you asks polite enough and pays, one of us will more than likely help you out. Not treating witches with respect, however, is a good way to start wishin' you had.

What can a witch do for you, you ask? Well, we can't raise people from the dead and most of us don't do portals (though we can use the scrolls those daft Wizards write if the need arises; after all, if magic were hard, they wouldn't be able to manage it). But there are a number of things that only a witch can do well. An' it tends to be practical, useful stuff you can use to stay out of trouble in the first place if yer smart.

Witches make and sell (and sometimes even deliver) Teas. Our most popular formula is Healing Tea, which replenishes hit points at a faster rate, but we also have cures if you get poisoned or catch cold.

Witches can enchant to Steady, assuming they have a high enough skill in enchanting. Some items refuse to be enchanted beyond Slight Glow, but enchanting provides protection for items and makes weapons slightly stronger. It can also make them more difficult to weild, though.

Witches can Delude, which is a spell that will, eventually, with enough work on your part, convince an item to permanently become a Talisman with a name of your choosing. To make the item finally turn, however, takes at least a day's worth of showing the item off to everyone you can, using the item's name every time you look at it or use it, and talking about how great your "Deadly Weapon" or whatever name you've gotten is out loud. You have to make the item believe it is special, or it will never take on its new name. Until it turns, it will go through several levels of Octarine shadows and hazes, which a Witch or Wizard can see.

Witches can Bond Talismans to you. If you have successfully deluded an item, or have found a natural talisman that you would like to make yours and yours alone, Bonding is very useful. It makes it possible to trace the item back to you, and impossible for anyone else to properly use the talisman. PK witches can remove PK bonds, but non-PK witches can only remove a bond to themselves.

Witches can imbue crystals with a few of their spells so that you can use them. They can also cast some of their spells on you. To use a crystal, wear it. The color inside will fade as the crystal wears out; it will break when it is completely used up. The spell is inactive when you are not wearing the crystal, and it does not wear down when it is inactive. Useful spells include:

Witches can Mock you. Sometimes being laughed at and taunted is the thing you need to push you from failure to success, so it's not as mean as it sounds.

Witches can untalkerise a talker. Some can also create a talker for you, though it seems that it's easier to simply visit Jorodin's shop to have it done.

Witches can deliver things. Many will not deliver unless they are doing another service for you, or at all, but our ability to fly does have its uses. If you are really polite, we might be persuaded to deliver something to you.

Witches can see Octarine, so they are capable of telling you what level your enchanted or deluded items are at.

Witches can be of great help in fightin', too. We can vine victims to keep them from moving or following, tempt them with forbidden (and possibly poisoned) fruits, scathe them (you'd be amazed at the looks we know how to give), call forth bees to attack them, bash them with our broomsticks, and defend ourselves rather competently with our floating utensils and healing teas. Some witches can do a lot more--fightin' witches, they are. I'm not exactly a fightin' witch, but some of them are quite formiddable.

Witches can teach you magical skills. Some can teach you some others as well.

Mind you, we aten't obliged to do anything for anyone. We do it because we want to, or need money, or happen to be bored at the moment. So, when askin' a witch to help you out, ask respectfully, and check fingers and refers beforehand. Many have their abilities and policies on services stated there.

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Last updated: 12:42 am EST, Sunday, March 14th, 2004.
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