Last August I talked about losing my job and if you remember I referred to the woman who fired me as a fucking cunt on many occasions, which she is! Since then I want to get into self and alternative forms of employment where I can use my creativity and get rewarded for that so I don't have to work for pricks and cunts who treat me like shit. Now, the job market is about as good as a pile of puke and people ain't going to make it, unless they are ass kissing conformists. I am hoping to get started with a business of selling t-shirts, buttons and bumper stickers on either e-bay or some other way online because I have a lot of creativity with writing and some with graphic arts. I have come up with nearly 100 things to write on t-shirts and then sell them, but I will read the top 69 things that I have come up with to write on t-shirts.

1. Maggots are Better than Humans
2. Cats are Better than Humans
3. Normal People are Influenced by Satan
4. Religion is for the Weak Minded
5. Pro Lifers can eat out my Twat while I'm on the rag
6. Nuclear War is Wonderful if it Causes Humans to become Extinct
7. I would Rather Spend Quality Time with my Cat
8. I would Rather Sleep with cats than Sleep with People
9. I would Rather sleep with a cat and hear it purr than sleep with a human and hear it snore!
10. You say I'm Gross when I pick Boogers out my nose, but Boogers come out your nose too!
11. The Smell of a Fart comes From Satan!
12. Abortion is a Wonderful Thing
13. Your child made honor student because
14. Your Favorite Baseball Team Didn't Make it to the World Series Because God Fucking Hates you!
15. Infertility is a Wonderful Thing!
16. What Would Zappa do?
17. I want Jim Morrison to Come Back From the Dead
18. People who say that artists must starve can go suck my Dick!
19. Give me an all-you-can eat buffet or give me death!
20. Prozac should be affordable and available without a prescription
21. People who are against mass transit are Fucking Assholes
22. As soon as I smelled your breath, my penis got soft
23. I want the 4 students who were murdered at Kent State to come back from the dead and get even!
24. An abortion clinic is more sacred than a church!
25. When I told you to eat my pussy, I didn't mean for you to eat my cat!
26. Abortion helps create affordable housing
27. Smile and pretend that the world doesn't suck
28. Abortion Doctors are like flowers-You can never have too many of them!
29. I would rather scoop the turds out of a cat's litter box than change diapers loaded with piss and shit!
30. I want space aliens to invade the Earth and blow it up!
31. Breeding Sucks!
32. The best thing that someone should do once they max out their credit cards is to kill themself!
33. Listening to George W Bush give a speech caused my dinner to come up!
34. I have felt so much better since that kidney stone passed out of my penis
35. Planned Parenthood is better unplanned parenthood
36. I would rather hear a cat meow than hear a baby cry
37. I would rather hear a cat throw up than hear a baby cry
38. If God is against anal sex, he would not have put a hole in your ass!
39. People who want to have kids have no imagination
40. Real men shave their legs!
41. Having an orgasm brings me closer to God!
42. Conformists have no imagination
43. Real men have sex with Jesus!
44. Blame Florida!
45. People who have no imagination, suck!
46. My cat is more intelligent than George W Bush
47. People who enjoy listening to Clear Channel Radio stations have shit for brains
48. People get bitchy when they run out of pot
49. My cat is more intelligent than your honor student
50. I'd love to go shopping to fight terrorism, but my fucking job at Wal-Mart Nickeled and dimed me!
51. I would rather die than go to work tomorrow and put up with their fucking shit!
52. The world would be a MUCH better place if people would stop having kids!
53. If I wanted to put up with a bunch of authoritarian fucking assholes, I would have joined the army!
54. It is legal to walk around naked on other planets
55. Satan says, "have lots of babies and create more poverty."
56. Most people are full of shit
57. Frequent Masturbation helps prevent prostate cancer!
58. My wife wants to have lots of babies and I ain't going tell her about my vasectomy!
59. What the world needs now is more birth control
60. I am so glad that Timothy Mc Veigh was executed because there is no more terrorism
61. Why is George W Bush so interested in creating Democracy in Iraq when he's taking it away here?
62. People who enjoy reading the National Enquirer are fucking assholes!
63. Kids who bring guns to school and shoot bullies are heroes for doing their part to rid the world of scum
64. Breeding, what is it good for? Absolutely Nothing!
65. I hate waking up in the morning with a stiffie and have no time to beat off before I have to go to work!
66. Beavis and Butt-Head are more intelligent than George W Bush!
67. It's amazing how "pro-lifers" love the unborn, but once your born, your fucked!
68. Beavis and Butt-Head are more intelligent than your honor student!
69. 69 is a good form of birth control

    Anyway, it has been since 1982 that I have enjoyed seeing bumper stickers, buttons and t-shirts that have nasty and explicit stuff written on it because that stuff is cool. I would like to make and sell the t-shirt that says "fuck you you fucking fuck, but I can't because that's already been taken. There has got to be a market for this (I hope!) because I have seen other types of cool and interesting t-shirts and people actually buy them.

Pat D is just about as creative with the t-shirts as he is with doing spoken word, but he hasn't had much luck getting his t-shirt business going and you can read about 1 obsticle that he ran into when he went into a graphic supply store and the woman there turned out to be a real fucking cunt or you can continue reading Pat's 2004 Vision of the World page to encouarage all cool people to help create a world that doesn't suck!