Planet Earth is a living-breathing thing and Mother Earth is a lot more powerful than people realize. The 1st question that comes to my mind is, does Mother Earth have a cunt? I don't have the answer to that question, but if she does, it is probably located somewhere in the Florida Everglades, but 1 thing I know for certain. Mother Earth has a penis. In fact, Mother Earth has many penises and 1 of them happens to be Mt. St. Helens! Mt. St. Helens is nothing more than a giant rock hard cock and Mt. St Helens enjoys it every time it squirts out a load of hot lava.

     With that in mind, if you are a guy, you should pull down your underpants and touch your penis and there is a good chance that it will get hard. Then you should start stroking it with your hand and it will feel real good. To make the experience even more enjoyable, you may want to consider inserting a plastic penis up your ass. Anyway, continue to stroke your penis up and down with your hand until a load of thick white stuff squirts out of it. With that in mind, your penis is just like Mt. St. Helens! When you are finished, take a kleenix and wipe that stuff off your chest or people might notice a funny smell. Now if you are a girl, pull down your panties and put your finger on your clit. I'm not exactly sure how women beat off, but I think they do it by putting their finger on their clit and make tiny little circles. It will feel so good while you are rubbing your clit and keep rubbing it until you orgasm. After you have an orgasm, you need to say to yourself, "sex is wonderful!"

     Now whether you are a guy or a girl, it is important that when you go into work the next day to tell your co-workers about beating off and mention to them about how enjoyable it was. Make sure that you talk about it very loud, so everyone gets to hear your conversation. Personally, I would rather hear my co-workers talk about beating off than listen to them talk about football! Now, if you are a waiter or a waitress working in a restaurant, wait until Sunday morning, like at around 11AM to talk about beating off and talk about it very loud and make sure that the customers get to hear it because a lot of them people just getting out of church who are uptight narrow minded bible thumping assholes. By the way, make sure that you mention that you stuck a plastic penis up your ass while you masturbated! A lot of those conservative religious people will get offended by hearing stuff like that, but you know what? Fuck Em! It offends me whenever I hear people talk about procreation, but they get all upset and moral when it comes to sex, even though procreation comes from fucking!

   On the other hand Mother Earth loves sex and Mt St Helens proves my point! Mother Earth also loves it whenever a woman has an abortion because there are 6 1/2 billion human parasites cluttering up our planet and destroying it. Mother Earth is really mad as hell at humans for hating sex so much, but they love breeding! She really hates it when people living in deep poverty in shit infested 3rd world countries continue to have more and more babies. It is only a matter of time that Mother Earth will do something to get back at humans for destroying the planet. Can you say tsunami? Tsunami came along and washed hundreds of thousands of human parasites out to sea like a bunch of retards. Animals are smarter than humans. They knew how to use their intuition and knew the tsunami was coming and they got the fuck out of there and moved to higher ground. Because most humans are a bunch of mediocre conformist religious retards, they just sat there and let tsunami take them out to sea, but maybe they were just hoping to die anyway because there is no hope and no future, but they continue to breed anyway.

    Meanwhile, a city not far from the devastating tsunami, Bangkok was spared the devastation. Why? Because Mother Earth loves Bangkok! For 1 thing, that city has 1 of the most beautiful names of any city in the entire world! Mother Earth also loves Bangkok because it is a city based on diversity, not conformity. Mother Earth also loves Bangkok because there are a lot of people engaging in sleazy, perverted sex and sodomy, which is a very good form of birth control!

     Meanwhile, have you ever noticed that tornadoes always hit small towns where most of the people there are trash? That's because Mother Earth hates those people because they like breeding, but they hate sex. Now, the next question that comes to mind is, with the amount of pornography on the inter-net and considering that so many people in small towns are looking at that pornography would mean that Mother Earth would protect them from tornadoes? Right. Wrong! There are a lot of men, many of them conservative right wing bible thumping assholes and they will talk about how sick and evil pornography is and they will often say that as soon as they are done jerking off, while they were looking at it. Mother Earth hates hypocrites!

     1 of the small towns that Mother Earth sent a tornado to was St. Peter because Mother Earth hates the people in that community. Not only are they a bunch mediocre conservative assholes, but also there is a psychiatric concentration camp in that town. That tornado was meant to send a message to the people of St. Peter that they need to change there ways or else. For 1 thing, they need to open up some adult bookstores in St. Peter. They also need to open up an abortion clinic and put billboards up all over town that says, "save the planet, have an abortion!" Last, but not least, they need to change the name of the town from St. Peter to Stiff Peter! I can guarantee that if they listen to and implement my ideas, Stiff Peter will never get hit by another tornado, but if they don't then another tornado is a comin!. The people in that town need to ask themselves a very important question. Would they rather see another tornado come or would they rather see a stiff peter cum? Most people would actually rather see a tornado come because most people are a bunch of narrow-minded assholes who hate sex!

    Now, if people hate sex so much, then they shouldn't be having sex and if they cannot refrain from having sex, then they should get themselves castrated! Most of this hatred of sex comes from religion because religion is a bunch of hypocrisy and bullshit. Every single church sucks, including the gay and so called "liberal" churches because they pretend to be so enlightened, but they hate sex, but they love breeding so much. There are however 2 churches that I happen to like. 1 of them is the Church of Euthanasia because they are a religion that is pro-sex and antibreeding, which is the way it should be! The other church that I happen to like is the Heaven's Gate cult and people would ask me, why would I like them so much? They hate sex! They also got themselves castrated, which means they practiced what they preach and then they killed themselves, which is even better, yet! Now, their suicide should not be taken in vein because they got to go for a ride on a space ship that was following Comet Hail Bop. I hope that's true because if it ain't then they killed themselves for nothing! The point I have been trying to make is people hate sex, but love breeding and I am sick and tired of that bullshit. The world would be a much better place if they loved sex and would stop breeding and get rid of religion, accept for the Church of Euthanasia and people would only have to obey 1 commandment, instead of 10 and that commandment is, Though Shall not procreate!

Now, who can say it better than Pat and the Church of Euthanasia.  No one!!  Pat said that most humans are parasites and assholes.  They don't have to be assholes.  They chose to be assholes and there is a cure for assholism and it is a very simple 1.  All an asshole needs to do is read Pat's 2005 Vision of the World Page and if they are willing to learn from it, there is a possibility that they won't be an asshole anymore, but I am afraid that too many people would rather chose assholism!