CHAPTER IV

DICK COMES AND FUCKS SOUTH FLORIDA

        As time went on, it was beginning to appear that Hurricane Dick had changed his course and he was going to hit Broward County, instead. Hal was getting increasingly nervous as he was watching the news coverage of the storm, which announced that the eye of Hurricane Dick was expected to hit Davie. He took Meg's dead body into the living room and started praying under a giant statue of Jesus. He was praying that no one would find out that he had murdered his wife and he was praying that Hurricane Dick wouldn't cause him or his house any harm. While he was praying, Jesus appeared and said, "Dick is going to huff and puff, and blow your house down, asshole". While he was praying, the winds got stronger and stronger. They then got so strong, the roof flew off his house and that giant statue of Jesus fell on Hal's head and killed him.

      Meanwhile, it was time for Tiffany to engage in her lesbian sex with Mrs. Robinson in the back seat of Tiffany's car. Mrs. Robinson was eating out Tiffany's pussy and as it turns out she was enjoying it! However, there was a problem that was causing Mrs. Robinson to be unable to enjoy eating out Tiffany. Tiffany didn't bother to wash her pussy, which caused her to have a foul fishy smell. This is what Mrs. Robinson had to say: "Tiffany, for such a pretty girl, your twat stinks. Don't you ever wash your cunt"? Tiffany was a delicate girl and couldn't handle having someone talk so vulgar to her, especially another woman. Well, this is how Tiffany replied to that question: "I was so busy getting ready for the hurricane, I didn't have time to wash my vagina and do you have to be so crude about it"? Mrs. Robinson said, "I can be as crude as I feel like it, you little cunt and with that attitude, I'm not going to let you make the cheerleading squad, cunt". At that point, it was time for Tiffany to blackmail Mrs. Robinson. Tiffany said, "either you put me on the cheerleading squad or I'm going to tell the police that you molested me". At that point, Mrs. Robinson pulled out a knife and said, "you're going to fucking die for blackmailing me you little cunt"! Tiffany said, "go ahead, stick that knife in me. Without making the cheerleading squad, I'm nothing. I want to die". Mrs. Robinson said, "your wish is my command". She then took the knife and stuck it in Tiffany's chest. For Tiffany, the pain was unbearable. She wished she had never said that. Mrs. Robinson decided to inflict more torture on Tiffany by biting and eating her tits while she was fucking her. She enjoyed sucking the blood out of her tits like a vampire. Tiffany said while in extreme pain and agony, "please stop, I know I've been a bad girl. Just kill me and get it over with". Mrs. Robinson said, "you're going to pay for fucking with me, baby. I'm going to fuck you good". Mrs. Robinson kept fucking Tiffany and biting her tits until she had an orgasm. After that, Mrs. Robinson was sitting there in shock so bad, she hardly even noticed how much Hurricane Dick was shaking the car.

       Mrs. Robinson was wondering what could make her want to do something so sick. After awhile she realized that fucking Tiffany while killing her gave her the best orgasm that she ever had. She was able to understand what made Jeff Dahmer tick. Mrs. Robinson decided that she was going to become a serial killer and kill more pretty girls while she was fucking them, but first she was going to finish Tiffany off. She took the knife and cut Tiffany's cunt causing her even more pain. Mrs. Robinson started sucking the blood out of Tiffany's cunt and she enjoyed it so much, she hardly noticed the foul fishy smell she had. While Mrs. Robinson was sucking the blood out of Tiffany's cunt, Dick decided that he was going to have the last laugh by fucking both of them, because a strong gust of wind caused a tree to fall on the car killing both of them, which means that Tiffany and Mrs. Robinson were sent to that big cheerleading squad in Hell. What happened was a real tragedy. That car that Tiffany's parents bought for her was worth a lot of money and the car was comepletely trashed.

       The intensity of Hurricane Dick was unbelievable. While Dick was coming, he destroyed virtually everything in his path. The severe damage went from Boca Raton on the north to North Dade on the south. The winds from Hurricane Dick were so powerful that it caused a landfill in Pompano Beach to open up causing garbage to fly everywhere. That landfill was full of dirty diapers, used tampons, rotten meat, medical waste, including syringes and disposable enemas. Those weren't the only things that were in that landfill. It turns out that the government buried toxic waste and Agent Orange in the landfill and decided not to tell anyone about it. Well, after Hurricane Dick opened up the landfill, the rotten meat, used tampons, the dirty diapers, the medical waste including the enemas and the toxic waste and Agent Orange went flying through the air all over South Florida. Seeing that there was already Agent Orange in Hurricane Dick, Dick opening up the landfill added to it, significantly.

     Well, Hurricane Dick came and went and the damage that Dick caused was incredible. With 666 mile per hour winds, he was 3 times stronger than Hurricane Andrew. The most reassuring thing was Channel 7 news was there covering the arrival of Hurricane Dick. Now they were going to cover the aftermath of Dick.

      As soon as Hurricane Dick passed, Channel 7 news was going around looking at the damages and the casualties that Hurricane Dick caused. The first casualty they found was 2 women were found dead in the back seat off a car and Channel 7 news reporter Victor Sauncauz was there and this is his report: "We have found 2 women dead in the back seat of a car who were killed when a tree fell on the car. What makes this story bizarre is the 2 women were found in the nude and it appears that they were engaging in, what appears to be a lesbian sex act together, right during the middle of Hurricane Dick. The women have been identified as Patty Robinson who was a gym teacher at Davie High and Tiffany Blundy who was one of her students. Police believe that the 2 women were engaging in a lesbian sex act because they found Patty Robinson with her mouth on Tiffany's vagina. Paramedics removed the bodies about 5 minutes ago. Oh and this just in. The story is even more bizarre than previously thought. When the bodies were removed, Tiffany was found with stab wounds in her chest and her vagina and her breasts appear to have been bitten and it is believed that Mrs. Robinson killed Tiffany before Dick did. We do have to wait for the medical examiner's report before we will know for sure. We will keep you up to date on this breaking story. For Channel 7 news I'm Victor Sauncause". So everyone got to find out about how Tiffany's life ended. Even in Minneapolis where Tiffany use to live, her bizarre death made headlines as her former classmates discussed in shock about how the popular cheerleader met the end of her life.

       As soon as Hurricane Dick passed, it didn't take long for the weather to get too fucking hot again and this time, thanks to Dick ripping apart that landfill, there was the lovely smell of all that garbage in the air, including the toxic waste and Agent Orange. People knew about the garbage being in the air, but they didn't know about the toxic waste and Agent Orange, yet, but they would find out, after they get spots on their skin and get radiation poisoning. After Hurricane Dick passed, Jeff left the shelter at the Coral Ridge Presbyterian Church and to his dismay, the church only suffered minor damage, but at least he got to vandalize the place somewhat and leave a few used condoms there. For Jeff's troubles, that was only the beginning. He went back to his house to discover that he lost almost everything that he had. His cat was killed. He also lost his computer, his stereo, and all of the tapes he had, except one. Under a pile of debris, Jeff found his boombox and it got knocked over and a bunch of shit fell on it. Miraculously, it still worked. He left one of his favorite tapes in the boombox from a group who call themselves, "The Stiff Peters". So the only thing that Jeff had left was the clothes on his back, his boom box with a "Stiff Peters" tape and he also found his plastic penis with Dan Quayle's face on it. At that point, Jeff wasn't even pissed off about what had happened because he was still in shock. He was also still on Prozac, which was keeping his violent behavior under control, but not for long. Because of Hurricane Dick, there was a short supply of Prozac, which means that the places that had it were price gouging which caused the price of prescription drugs to sky rocket as though they weren't high enough. It was against the law to charge people $5 for a bag of ice, but it was legal for people to be price gouging prescription drugs. Of course the drug companies had the money and the power to bribe politicians to keep it legal to price gouge prescription drugs. Jeff couldn't afford the high price of Prozac, so as soon as the supply that he had ran out, the shit would fly and a lot of people would die!

Find out how Jeff reacts to the aftermath of that Evil Dick in Chapter V