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A guy went out hunting. He had all the gear, the jacket, the boots and the double-barreled shotgun. As he was climbing over a fence, he dropped the gun and it went off, shooting him right through the penis. Obviously, he had to see a doctor.

When he woke up from surgery, he found that the doctor had done a marvelous job repairing it. As he got ready to go home, the doctor gave him a business card.

"This is my brother's card. I'll make an appointment for you to see him."

The guy says, "Is your brother a doctor?"

"No," Doc replies, "he plays the flute. He'll show you where to put your fingers so you don't piss in your eye."

HIDEOUS DOCTRINE


"The hideous doctrine of eternal torment after death has probably caused more terror and misery, more cruelty and more violation of natural human sympathy, than any religious belief in the history of mankind. Yet this doctrine was unambiguously taught by Jesus."

Margaret Knight � lecturer � Aberdeen University

"Humanity has the stars in its future, and that future is too important to be lost under the burden of juvenile folly and ignorant superstition."

Isaac Asimov

"I distrust those people who know so well what God wants them to do because I notice it always coincides with their own desires."

Susan B. Anthony

RITUAL CHILD SACRIFICE
Man immolates his daughter to please God

"At that time the Spirit of the LORD came upon Jephthah, and he went throughout the land of Gilead and Manasseh, including Mizpah in Gilead, and led an army against the Ammonites.� And Jephthah made a vow to the LORD. He said, "If you give me victory over the Ammonites, I will give to the LORD the first thing coming out of my house to greet me when I return in triumph.� I will sacrifice it as a burnt offering."

"So Jephthah led his army against the Ammonites, and the LORD gave him victory... When Jephthah returned home to Mizpah, his daughter � his only child � ran out to meet him, playing on a tambourine and dancing for joy.� When he saw her, he tore his clothes in anguish.� "My daughter!" he cried out.� "My heart is breaking!� What a tragedy that you came out to greet me. For I have made a vow to the LORD and cannot take it back."

"And she said, "Father, you have made a promise to the LORD.� You must do to me what you have promised, for the LORD has given you a great victory over your enemies, the Ammonites.� But first let me go up and roam in the hills and weep with my friends for two months, because I will die a virgin."� "You may go," Jephthah said. And he let her go away for two months.� She and her friends went into the hills and wept because she would never have children.� When she returned home, her father kept his vow, and she died a virgin."�

Judges 11:29-40

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