Nickolas laid in bed beside Sunshine and watched her sleep. Today was the day. The day that would change their lives forever. Hopefully the decision he made would be the right one. Of course it would be. It was the only thing he wanted for the past six years and no one was going to change his mind. He didn�t care how much people would hate him. He watched Sunshine yawn and open her eyes and look at him.
�Morning,� Sunshine said smiling.
�Good morning, Sweets,� Nickolas said smiling in return and kissing her. She laid on her back, but kept her head on his chest. �What time is your appointment?�
�Two. Are you coming with?�
�Of course. I wouldn�t go anywhere else.�
�Just asking.�
�Ok.�
�What time is it?�
�A little after 9:30.� She didn�t say anything. �I love you, Sweets.�
She looked at him. �I love you too.� He smiled. �I think I just got my answer.� She got up out of bed and went into the bathroom, as Nickolas watched her.
�I didn�t give you an answer, Sweets.� He got out of bed and put a pair of boxers on. �Ain�t I allowed to say �I love you�?� He waited a second and Sunshine walked from the bathroom in her robe.
�It was just the way you said it. It�s like you were saying sorry for your decision.�
�I think we both will be afterwards.� She just looked at him. �What?�
�I think I know what your decision is and I am hurt but I also respect and understand it. I just want you to be happy and if having these twins will make you happy then I ain�t denying you of that. In all honesty it was my choice as well��
�Sunnie�� They sat on the bed.
�I just want you to be happy, Nicky. This is something you�ve wanted for so long and if it means risking my own life to do it then so be it. You�ve��
�Sunnie��
�You�ve done so much for me and helped me through the most difficult times. You�ve lifted me back up when I thought there was no hope, you opened my eyes to see how much I love you and you showed me the true meaning of love. You helped me fight my addiction to anti-depressants and you helped me when you don�t even know it. You even helped me through a lot of things before I was even a thought in your head. You�ve done a lot and my love for you just grew every passing nanosecond. There was never a time I stopped loving you no matter how tough it got between us and I never will. I want to do this for you to pay you back for all you�ve done for me. It doesn�t matter how many times I say �I love you� it�ll never pay you back for what you�ve done and how happy you made me. I�ll always be grateful.�
�Are you finished?�
�I think so.�
�Good. Now before you get all prepared to have these babies, I want you to know how much I love you. Not just a little bit, but a lot. Hell, not even all the money in the world could add up to all the love I have inside for you. I love you and I can�t see my life without you. That is why I have decided to choose you over the babies. I don�t ever want to live without you in my life and that�s my decision. I choose you. If we go ahead and have these babies and you die I will die right along with you. Our children will never have either parent, because I won�t be able to do it. It�ll be too hard, because you�ll be with me everywhere, but you won�t be there.�
�Oh.�
�What is it?�
�I picked the twins because I thought that�s what you would want.�
�I know it might seem selfish of me to pick my wife over an unborn child or two, but I have to. I didn�t wait, like, five years to get with you and then, like, two years later have you die on me. I couldn�t go through that and I would never forgive myself. I might not forgive myself for not letting our children have a chance at life, bit this is what I want. I want you. I wanted you six years ago and I still want you to this day and everyday in the future. I don�t care who hates me for this decision, but it�s my choice.�
�I honestly thought you�d want the children.� She wiped away tears and looked at him.
�Are you happy with my choice?�
�Both.� He hugged her. �Sad and happy; more sad though, because I wanted to give you a child.�
�I love you and this has to prove how much I do.�
�Yes and I�m happy for that.�
�Maybe in a couple years we can try again when everything�s all right, ya know.�
�Maybe. I just wanted this for ya, ya know. I wanted to give ya a family even though I never acted like it.�
�But are you ok with my decision?� She sighed. �Sunnie, if you�re not ok with it then we have a major discussion.�
�I just want you happy, Baby. Whatever will make you happy. If you want the twins instead that�s fine. If you want me that�s fine. This is your decision, because I want you happy.�
�I want you, Sweets. You�re the only one that can make me happy and I ain�t changing my mind about this.� She didn�t say anything. �Why don�t you go shower and I�ll go make us breakfast.�
�Wash my back?� He chuckled. �Please?�
�I don�t know.�
�Please? Don�t make this difficult.�
�If you insist.�
�I do.�
�Alright.�
�We have to hurry though, because we have to go down to Tampa.�
�That�s right. Dr. Martin transferred ya down to Dr. Matheson.�
�Exactly. I don�t want to be late.�
�You�re never late for you appointments.�
�Have to make it look good.�
�Yeah.� She kissed him and went into the bathroom.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
�What time is Sunn�s appointment?� Brian asked as he, Danielle, and Adrianna sat at the kitchen table for lunch.
�Um, two down in Tampa with a Dr. Matheson,� Danielle replied.
�Do you know what they decided?�
�No; Sunn said she�ll tell us after the appointment. If they go through with the pregnancy and have the baby Sunn�s life is at risk. If they don�t go through with the pregnancy they�ll both be devastated. Nick will be devastated, because he won�t get the family he always wanted with Sunn. And Sunn will be devastated, because she won�t be able to give Nick the family he wants.�
�But also if they go through with it they just might not get to be that family they want to be.�
�I know.� She sighed. �I just feel so bad for them. We had a baby, Alex and Des has two babies as did Jo and D, and Kev and V are going to be having three. Sunn and Nick just might not be able to have any.�
�In situations liked this ya have to look at the positive. For all anyone knows nothing could happen to Sunn if they decide to have this baby. She could come out of it perfectly fine. Yes she is having problems now, but ya never know what can happen in the end. Then again if they don�t go through with it and then learn she can�t have any they can always get a surrogate or adopt if they still want that family.�
�What�s going to be really hard for them, if they decide not to, is dealing with Destiny�s pregnancy.�
�She�s pregnant again?�
�Yeah. They found out like last week.�
�Bone said nothing to anyone.�
�Was Nick around?�
�Yeah.�
�That�s probably why, because Des didn�t tell Sunnie yet.�
�Do you blame her?�
�No; after her behavior towards Caroline and Tyler this past month or so I wouldn�t tell her either.�
�It is odd.�
�There was a time when Sunnie Jo loved being around kids. It�s what made her happy along with Nick.�
�One day it�ll be the same again.�
�I hope so.�
�It will be so don�t worry about it.�
�When I found out about Sunn�s condition I just wished she never went to Australia to do that stupid movie.�
�But it was something she wanted.�
�And she also used it as a scapegoat, because Howie broke her heart, Jo and Des broke their trust, and Nick pushed her away.�
�Are you blaming them for what happened to Sunn?� Danielle just looked at him. �It ain�t their fault, Baby. Nobody knew there was such an infection. Nobody is to blame.�
�But they pushed her to go.�
�She was going to go either way. If what happened never happened I�m sure she would�ve told us, but it happened the way it did. God works in mysterious ways, but no one�s to blame.�
�Why not?�
�Because it�s no one�s fault.�
�Maybe I only blame Nick. Did you ever think of that?�
�Why?�
�How can anyone forget what he�s done to her?�
�He wasn�t the one playing games with her heart for four years; it was the other way around.�
�But she never accused him of cheating and broke his heart by breaking the engagement. She didn�t have him addicted to anti-depressants.� Brian looked at her and wondered how she knew about the addiction. As far as he was concerned he was the only one that knew that was the reason Nickolas and Sunshine went to Switzerland. Nickolas had told him in complete confidence and he hadn�t told a soul and Nickolas swore Sunshine was never going to tell anyone. �And never told him about an ex-psychotic boyfriend until their wedding day when he showed up.�
�Nick made his mistakes, but he and Sunn got through them, because their love for each other is strong enough to survive anything.�
�Sunn�s one of my best friends and I won�t stand around while some asshole of a guy hurts her.�
�That asshole of a guy happens to be my best friend.�
�And your point is? I wouldn�t be a bit surprised if he picked the baby over Sunshine. It�ll show everyone what a heartless prick he actually is.�
�I will not sit here and listen to you bad mouth Nick.�
�You�re defending him?�
�Yes I am.� He got up and picked up Adrianna. �I�m going to take Adi for a drive while you go to your doctor�s appointment.� He gave Danielle a kiss and walked out.
CHAPTER 20 CHAPTER 22
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