She didn�t understand why they couldn�t respect her rules. They were simple to follow and weren�t that hard to learn. There were just two major ones she wanted them to follow: no sex in her home unless she was the one doing it and no making out in her presence. Apparently they didn�t care about rule number two. Every now and then she would hear kissing sounds and she�d look and there they�d be all over each other. She figured Josephine was just doing it to piss her off and Nickolas was doing it to make her jealous. Josephine was succeeding in pissing her off, but she wasn�t jealous.
Nickolas knew how she felt and that she wanted to be with him, but he turned down her proposal. She didn�t understand why though. If he really wanted to make her jealous he could marry someone else. Hell that probably wouldn�t even make her jealous. It would probably just piss her off even more. She had no reason to be jealous over Josephine. After all she�s the one that slept with Nickolas and not Josephine�at least as far as she knew. He could have slept with someone else. She did sleep with Bradley after all. Something Nickolas was never going to know unless he had to.
If he slept with Josephine though things would never be the same. He probably wouldn�t sleep with one of her best friends to purposely hurt her. The man thinks with his penis more than half of the time. Josephine would just do it to hurt her. After all she did ruin things with Howard. Hell he helped ruin them too. Everyone was just doing something to piss her off. At least Bradley didn�t. At least he cared and respected her and showed concern over her. Everyone else just didn�t seem to care. She showed concern and has respect and cared for her friends, but they couldn�t return that anymore.
She was having the most horrible time anymore. She just needed to get away. She did accept one of the scripts she was reading so hopefully they would soon have a date for when production started that way she could get out of this place. She needed something to get her out of this place as soon as possible. She had nothing scheduled until the end of the month, but that wasn�t soon enough. She needed something now. Then again maybe her fifteen minutes were slowly fading.
Nah; she didn�t believe that. Christina Aguilera�s fifteen minutes were up. She laughed at the thought. Yeah Christina was nice to her the couple times they talked, but Sunshine didn�t care for the whole �I�m-a-slut-and-I�m-better-than-you-are� attitude she had going on. People really weren�t into that were they? If they were then Sunshine�s fifteen minutes were really up.
She heard Josephine laugh and looked at them. Nickolas was tickling her and Sunshine remembered all the times Nickolas tickled her just to hear her laugh. Those days seemed to be gone though. They seemed a billion light years away anymore. She sighed at the thought and looked away. She had no idea what to do. She had no one to cuddle with and feel needed and wanted and sexy. Nickolas always told her she was sexy, but he didn�t even do that anymore. Nothing was the same between them anymore since she proposed. Maybe it was a bad idea after all.
At the time it seemed like a great thing to do�to surprise him. Maybe he really didn�t love her like he said he did and just wanted to get her in the sack. It worked though if that was it. He was a good actor, because she believed him along with everyone else. God she was such a sucker. A sucker for Nickolas. She smiled. That blonde hair, those gorgeous blue eyes, that sexy killer smile, the way he laughed, that becoming look he gave her�she really was a sucker for him. She fell for it all hook line and sinker.
She loved him and he knew that deep down. Her smile faded. But apparently he didn�t care anymore. Everything he said to her in Europe had to be a lie. He pulled at her heart strings and she believed it all. Damn she was pathetic. She fell for the first guy that gave her an �I�m-going-to-have-you-one-day� smile and she ends up getting hurt. She told Danielle she wanted Nickolas, but maybe she didn�t want him anymore. Maybe it�s actually been Bradley that�s been in her heart all this time.
What did it matter anyway? She was just going to end up alone in the end anyway despite what Bradley or anyone else told her. She knew what her future was going to be. All she was going to have was her career and some stranger�s love child. She was going to be a single mother while her friends lived happy with the men of their dreams and not give Sunshine one thought. It was starting now. She knew it was. Danielle had Kevin. Venus had Alexander. Josephine had Nickolas. Destiny had Howard. Hell, Brian probably had someone hiding somewhere. Even Bradley probably had someone hiding somewhere. Sunshine didn�t though and she wasn�t going to.
Not that she didn�t want to. The thought of having a secret lover made her�excited to say the least. Having someone in her life that no one knew about would be perfect for her. At least she wouldn�t have to answer any questions about their relationship or whatever. Then again with her career being on the move and being in magazines she probably wouldn�t get that private time. Just hanging with the girls the paparazzi was taking pictures. Then again she chose this career so she had to deal with it. She might not like it, but she�d deal with it until it got too out of hand. So the secret lover idea wouldn�t work. Someone would find out sooner or later.
She did have a secret lover once. That was Nickolas. Before he got the stick up his ass. Before he decided to start being faithful to his girlfriend. Before she proposed. What a mistake that was. She wanted to show him how much she loved him and he turned her down. He probably laughed about it when he left that night. He probably had a hoot telling the guys. Humiliating her even more than she already was. She sighed disgustedly and shook her head then went back to her email, as the phone rang.
She looked at Josephine, since she was nearest to it, but she didn�t budge off the floor. It rang a couple more times and Josephine still didn�t answer. �Ugh!� Sunshine put her laptop down and got up. �I�ll walk the few feet I have to to answer the damn phone although you�re like two inches away from it. I wouldn�t want ya to take time out of your disrespect towards me and answer the fucking phone.� She picked the phone up and turned it on, as Nickolas and Josephine looked at her. �What?!�
�Um, is Sunshine there?�
�This is her.�
�This is Caitlin. Is everything all right?�
�Uh, yeah, sorry.� She went back to her spot on the love seat, as Nickolas continued looking at her.
�I know it�s late and all, but I just wanted to call and see how you would feel about being on the cover of Maxim?�
�Cool, yeah.�
�Great.�
�When�s the shoot?�
�It�s not until July 18.�
�Damn. Couldn�t they fit me in, like, now?�
�The photographer they hired is booked until then.�
�Right.� She got a pen and flipped to July on her big desk calendar and found the 18th and wrote down Maxim shoot, as Nickolas stood behind her and looked.
�They do want the issue out by Christmas.�
�Yeah.�
�Then I was looking over your schedule here and I see that you�re all booked for the next few months.�
�Yeah.�
�Are you sure you can handle all this? It�s not going to be too much?�
�I�ll be fine, Caitlin. I need stuff to keep my mind off all this shit that�s going on at home. I don�t mind the work.�
�Well I�m not going to book anything for the next couple days. I want you to get some rest.�
�I will so don�t worry.�
�Alright.�
�I�ll see you in a week then for your TRL appearance.�
�Ok, I�ll see ya then.�
�Bye, Sunshine.�
�See ya.� Sunshine turned off the phone and put it on the coffee table. Not knowing Nickolas was behind her, she leaned back and just as quickly sat up. �Fuck, Nick.�
�Sorry,� Nickolas apologized.
�What the hell are you doing?� He shrugged and sat on the loveseat beside her.
�I�m bored.�
�That�s hard to believe. You seemed pretty cozy there on the floor with Jo.�
�Jealous.� She rolled her eyes in a �no� and picked up her laptop. �Maxim.�
�Excuse me?�
�You�re doing a shoot for Maxim.�
�Not that it�s any of your business yes I am. And if you have a problem with it then that�s your problem. I�m not your girlfriend.�
�Ok, you�re in a bad mood.�
�What gives ya that idea?� She looked away from him and at her laptop screen.
�May I ask why?�
�Besides the fact that this is my condo and you and your slut have no respect for me whatsoever? Not a thing.� Nickolas just looked at her. �She does it to piss me off, but you I don�t understand what the hell your problem is. Maybe I really don�t want to know so just save it.�
�Sunnie��
�Forget it, Nick. Ever since I asked you to marry me things haven�t been the same between us. I�m so regretting that trip to Europe to see you.�
�You mean that?�
�Yes I do. If I knew things were going to turn out this way I wouldn�t have gone and made a complete fool of myself.�
�You didn�t make a fool of yourself. I was flattered you asked and I�m sorry I declined. I do love you and would love to marry you one day, but right now I�m just not ready to take that step.� She looked at him. �And I don�t think you are either.� She didn�t say anything and sighed. �We�re still young, Sunnie, and have our whole lives ahead of us.�
�You don�t know that.�
�Maybe not, but one can only hope, ya know.� He smiled trying to get her to smile, but not succeeding. �So you�re just going to sit here all miserable then.�
�Yep.�
�Even if I did this.� He moved closer to her and sat back while putting his arm around her shoulder.
�Yep.� If Josephine wasn�t here the things I would do to you right now, Carter. I�d have you saying yes. She smiled inside at the thought, as Josephine walked from the hall.
�Hey, hey, what�s this?� Josephine asked spying the two on the loveseat. �You got the wrong girl there, Nickolas.� Stuff it, Josephine, Sunshine thought. �Do you mind removing your arm from her?�
�I�m just trying to cheer her up,� Nickolas said defensively. �She�s not having a good night.�
�Why not?� Josephine asked sitting on the opposite side of Sunshine.
�Can I please get a little breathing room here?� Sunshine questioned and Nickolas and Josephine got up and moved to the sofa. �Thank you.�
�What�s wrong?� Josephine asked her friend.
�Like I told, Nick, nothing.� They just looked at her. �I�m just having one of those days. I don�t see why it�s everyone�s business how I�m feeling. It�s my business so forget it.� She sighed disgustedly yet again and continued with her email, as Nickolas and Josephine watched her.
CHAPTER 14
HOME