you'll do fine

around you, she tried not to mention
that she had been hurt
or let on to what was in her head
and so instead
alone, she cried with no intention
of sayin a word
to hide how weak she really was
all because of

her need for love, her fear of dying
all alone - and so young, self-denying
respect that she deserved, but learned
she'd never get on a two-way street...
her consolation, you've exhausted
never once would you have thought at all that
she was human too - and needed you
but i bet you saw it
when she got on her feet

and said let me alone - just leave me to myself
i've got no time to sympathize for someone else
there won't be no more good advice comin for free
for nobody - dont nobody ever look out for me
i spent my years tryna keep everyone appeased
and all this time, my tears were my only relief
don't no one listen up when i'm tryin to speak
so i finally said hell...
you'll do fine alone as well...

tha story...

I was raised to feel embarassed at feeling sorry for myself. My mom always compared my complaints to hers and constantly reminded me that I had no clue what a tough life was. So to this day, I find it hard to pass my troubles from my conscience to someone else's. This is why I'm a writer. *smiles* This year (2005) featured many tragic losses in my life. I never really got a chance to vent and just say everything I was feeling. I didn't even tell anybody what was going on. With the recent death of a close friend (Ryan, a wonderful soul that deserved more than this earth could offer), still on my mind, I went to a homegirl's house. After listening to her complain for hours on end about how sad and unfotunate it was that she couldnt buy a pair of expensive ass shoes that she wanted, I decided I needed to go home and have a good cry. She thought my leaving was something personal, assumed I was pissed off at her, and swore on her sons life that she never wanted to see me ever again... And the funny thing (to me) is that, if she cared enough to ask, she would have known exactly what was going on in my life and probably would have never even asked me to come over in the first place. This song was written the next day.

tha dedications...

To Wanda. I still love you - always will - but thats some foul shit. And to everyone that forgets to stop and think that maybe - just maybe - their problems aren't that bad, this is for you, too. I know it's my fault I never speak up, but, at the same time, I know I have every reason to feel uncomfortable doing so. I could be like others and just talk about myself whether or not anyone's interested, just because most won't have the balls to say "SHUT UP! I DONT CARE!". But it's common courtesy to refrain from burdening people with stupid shit. Because no one could ever take the time out to listen to my stupid shit, the idea of speaking out on the important shit never even crossed my mind. I'm not saying I'm going to be more inclined to share my troubles with everyone from now on, but, to whom this song concerns, I'm no longer interested in yours.

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