| My Illusion I sit here, secluding myself in my own world My thoughts as entertainment and those around me a mere illusion. This illusion distracts me from my thoughts, my world. I want it to disappear, I want them to go away. I hear my name being called from within the illusion Maybe someone cares? Maybe it was just the wind? I'm trapped in this world I've created. My thoughts, my illusion. |
| Almost The tears come unbidden I just don't recognize myself anymore. They don't understand, They try, but how can they when even I don't? I can't handle it anymore, Not knowing, not understanding. I can't live like this. The blade is resting against my wrist, All I have to do is press down. It could all be over. All the pain and confusion. My hands are shaking and I am crying. Why can't I do it? |
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| I know that the path I follow Shall cause me to die a thousand deaths Before life truly leaves me Why, then, have I chosen it? The answer is simple, yet so many people Choose to overlook it or assume it a weakness That brings you down rather than Carrying you on when life is too much. And I have found that the theme of this path Will always show itself, whether we realize It or not. This theme is not only a thought or a feeling. It is so much more. It is love. Love is and always has been the drving Force of life. The path I follow is one that I know will cause me to know a pain so deep That I will not know what to do. Love will consume you, heart and soul, but it Remains a wondrous, beautiful thing. Love is a Dream and a wish, but it is a dream and a wish that Can and will come true, if you only know where to look. Love can lift you up when you are down And the loss of it can make you feel so lost and alone. It is more beautiful than a rose in early bloom Still adorning all the thorns of life and death. Love is worth all the pain and sorrow that Come with it. Why? Simply because without it We have no reason to live. What is your life Worth if you've not known love? Whether it be the love of a mother or a father, A brother or a sister, a child or a friend, A husband or a wife, a lover or a stranger Love is and always will be in our lives. So I have chosen to walk this path of life The path that is full of love -- The path that Shall allow me to know love in every form -- Both the pain and pleasure of love. |
| Life is... Life is the Torture from which only Death can free Freedom is the Illusion that many are Blinded with Peace is the Facade that shall hide our Turmoil forever Love is the Lie that many allow to Reign in their lives Life is the Torture from which only Death can free |
| The Colors of Life Life passes me by in a whirlwind of colors. I see white first, a symbol of the purity that has been lost. Next is gray for the depressing times, then blue for the tears I've shed Then red and pink for the love I may never find And green for the luck I've never had. I see black last for the darkness in my heart The darkness that will never let me live the true colors of live. |
| Crimson Tears The tears of crimson across her palm Cease the pain in her broken heart The pain is gone and she does not feel But it comes back, it always does Those crimson tears let her breathe If only for a while. But when the time comes When she's suffocated, when she feels but cannot breathe She'll bring back her tears of crimson And one day these tears of crimson Will bring her the darkness she desires Those tears of crimson across her palm. |
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| Simply Love |
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| There is more to come.... |
| As the years go by And life goes on We might part ways Forget to call or write Meet new people Make new friends Though time and distance May stand between us Though trials and those Pesky big decisions Will come our way Know that you have Touched my life and Will always have a Special place in my heart I promise that through the Tough times, happy times Through it all, I will Always remember you As a true, great friend! |
| A Sleepless Night As I lay in bed, wishing for sleep My mind begins to stray and every Thought comes unbidden. I notice that there seems to be a Tingling sensation on my wrists and I wonder why. I think about death, I think About life. I think about love And about hate. My mind is calling, beckoning me To my wrists. That pale flesh with Those blue veins. They look so innocent, but I know Otherwise. They want me to cut Them, to destroy them. Because destroying them would mean Ending my life, and that�s exactly what They want me to do. I find myself silently crying, screaming Into my pillow, angry at their Ever-present call. I want to be happy � I�ve tried! I want to be with the one I love, the one Who loves me. So I ignore the tears and try to sleep, But the horrible images and feelings just Won�t leave me be. I give up and stare at the ceiling I know is Above me, though I cannot see it, and I Wish for a miracle. Perhaps my wish will come true, perhaps it Already has. Love and happiness, I am told, Are found in the most unexpected places. |
| My Wish In an attempt to prevent my pain from consuming me, heart and soul, I am writing this. Love has always been spoken of as a wondrous, beautiful thing, No one likes to talk about the pain it causes No one warned me about the throws of pain that would overcome me When my attempts at love were thrown in my face. At first it was wonderful, I was able to admire him from afar and I thought he had no clue. I was wrong, I think I am getting used to being wrong though. He knew, he knew yet he said nothing. He let me continue to admire him and strengthen our friendship. I watched as he dated girl after girl, all the while my mind was screaming �look at me! I love you!� And love him I do, though it pains me to admit it. It started as an admiring crush and grew into love. Eventually the love became rooted so deep that, despite my futile attempts, it would not be ignored or forgotten. In my efforts to bring an end to the love I felt for him, I found that my love only grew stronger. He eventually revealed his knowledge that I cared for him. Yes, cared, he thought I�d turned my attentions to another, he didn�t know how wrong that assumption was, is. True, I tried to love another, but he was always the one on my mind, my heart. I soon realized that my feelings for him would not be returned, but I refused to believe it. I wanted to keep loving and admiring him from afar and pretend that one day he would take my hands in his And tell me he loves me and that his life would not be complete without me in it. It was foolish of me to think that I could ever have that kind of fairy tale love. It hurt so much to wake up and realize that all my dreams, everything I wanted was just a fantasy, a wish. My dream is just a wish that will never come true. |
| Trapped and Alone I�ve shed the tears that nobody sees. I�ve given my pleas that nobody hears. I�m counting the days until I am freed. But I know I won�t be because I am Trapped in this place and there�s no way out. |
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| Come What May |
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| The greatest tragedy for a poet is to be admired through being misunderstood... |