| TRIP FOUR - CON'T AGAIN!!!! |
| Where was I... ah yes, the blonde chick grabs the set list which earlier in the nite Brockie said he'd give to "GWAR FAN" who was obviously a hardcore fan and excited. Keep in mind Brockie is wearing nothing but a kilt and nothing underneath it either, as he so eloquenty proves every nite at the beginning of the show by turning around and lifting it, showing ass & nuts to all within a mile radius. He grabs the set list back from the chick and turns to hand it to "GWAR FAN"... the chick gets angry and as Brockie turns away she grabs onto his kilt and yanks it off! The crowd screamed and he didn't seem to know what to do at first... if this was all planned out beforehand, they did a real good job at it... OH!!!! ALSO, how could I forget?!!? I WAS VIDEOTAPING THE WHOLE THING! All the shit that happened that nite with the exception of the beer bottle I had caught ontape. But ya know, when I see that something's going real wrong I'll leave whatever dignity is left right there and won't steal it onto a tape. As soon as I saw the kilt fly off I quickly pulled the camcorder down and recorded the side of the stage.... I kept the tape rolling cause they were just about to start "Fucking an Animal" and I wanted to definitely get that on tape... but I respect the guy and knew he didn't want that to happen so I refused to make it a permanent memory. So he quickly picks up his bass and covers up but not before it was too late, ya know? Someone grabs the kilt back, by now the look on Moo and Melissa's faces are beyond the "shocked" phase... everyone is screaming, and Brockie is still trying to hold it together and play the song despite he's totally naked and everyone's staring. He grabs the oil painting of "The Duke" and puts it behind the bass for extra coverage and stood in one spot but the picture kept slipping... eventually the picture fell but he didn't go to retrieve it so there he was in all his glory again. But the crowd wouldn't cut them a break. This other drunk chick hops onstage right next to him and starts dancing, showing her ass... brockie grabs onto her backpack she was wearing and pulls her away from the front and she lands behind him. So she fucking crawls behind him and pinches his balls or his ass, we couldn't tell... he turns around and yells for someone to get her offstage, she's dragged away screaming and yelling... I did get that on tape. But oh man... I felt bad! After the show finally ended I put the camera in Melissa's face and we were all, "What the fuck was that?!!?!" 5 minutes later Moo was still standing there, eyes wide and hand over mouth, completely in shock. Vance came by and yelled, "Damn that was intense! Did you get that all on tape?" Someone else later approached and asked for a copy of the show, I told him to get lost. Brockie was in a good mood tho after the show! "Hey girls!" he greeted us with. "Um, we're sorry about the show!" "What about it?" he smiled. "Uh, well, ya know... it seemed sorta out of hand at some points..." He waved it off, "Nah! Shit happens!" Whoa! Glad he's optimistic... turns out the power strip was bad so no matter what equipment he used it wasn't gonna work. Melissa was killer tired and couldn't even walk back to the car so I threw her on my back and walked all those blocks back to the car while people driving/walking by were hooting, "Hey, can I have a turn next?!?" Yah... go fuck yourself. No staying up that nite, it was time to sleep cause we had a LONG haul ahead of us... and my first day of school was the next day. We all crashed in various spots of one of the rooms they had, I had the honor of dozing in a pile of glass shards. I think Moo was rolled up in a corner between the wall and one of the beds. I wish I'd taken a picture of it, it was so cute. At that point we had no intention of hitting up Chicago/Indianapolis (later it'd be switched to South Bend...) so we thought, "Well, see ya'll this fall!" since we knew a GWAR tour was looming ahead. All the way home we rambled about what a blast we'd had the past 10 days, totally unbelievable! We were happy that our spontaneity bought us 1,200 miles from home and into an awesome roadtrip. Sunday afternoon was alright, we got home finally around 11am only to hear our brother was in the hospital... we headed straight to the ER and hung out there for awhile trying to amuse him with our road stories. I had to start school the next AM and I still hadn't even moved my shit into Orlando yet... I didn't have the $$ for my rent for Aug. Oops, wonder why! Ended up completely skipping the first 3 days of school cause I had no where to sleep! Sometime between the 18th and 27th we decided to go to Chicago/Indianapolis since it was labor day weekend and we had the time. Another 1,200 mile trek but who cares? We're nuts and have fully embraced it. Eventually I moved my shit in around Aug. 27th and never quite caught up on my school work. Little did I know that nite, Tuesday Aug. 27th, was gonna be one of those life-changing moments. I had a radio show on Tuesday nites at our campus station where I spent 2 hours assaulting the listeners with all my favorite shit, even playing the same song over and over if I felt the desire. I was in a shitty mood that nite as I walked towards the station with Rob & Butthole, 2 of my closest Orlando friends who know their fair share of my roadtrip life and have dealt with alot of shit from me. "Hey, do you wanna tell her?" Butthole said to Rob. "Tell me what?" They both grinned. "Nah, you can tell her, man!" Rob said. "WHAT?!?" I snapped. "TELL ME WHAT!?!?!" I think I was on the rag too. Butthole turned to me and said oh-so-casually," What are you doing on Tuesday October 8th?" October 8th? WTF? "Um I guess doing my radio show... why, who's coming to town?" I asked, since whenever they named a date it usually meant a concert. They both faced me and Butthole said, "Eh, no one too important, just this band that I think stands for 'God What an Awful Racket' is coming to the House of Blues..." I stopped dead and smiled so fucking big... my horrible mood melted away so fast, I guess the look on my face must've been hilarious cause they both pointed and bust out laughing so hard... "OMG you shoulda seen the look on your face!" they cried. "OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG!!! oh.. my.. GOD ARE YOU GUYS FUCKING KIDDING ME!?!?!? WHEN DID YOU HEAR THIS?!?!?!!?" Apparently it was just announced that day, one of the first dates of the tour. We raced to the station and pulled up the ticketbastard site... sure enough, it was the only show confirmed so far. My show that nite must've been a headache and a half cause I kept screaming and yelling into the mic. FINALLY I'd get to see another show!!! After being shot down so many times and attempts to see other shows (click here to read the sob stories of missed trips!) now I had a chance. But this wasn't gonna be it. OMG, there had to be other dates! We'd hit all the shows in FL, whoohooooo! Poor Moo. She was supposed to go back to CA after our Chicago/Indianapolis trip (which of course my folks weren't going to know about!) but now I dropped her a bomb. I called her up that nite and squealed into the phone, "IIIIEEEEEKKKKK!!" she screamed right back in my ear. We're such chicks, omg. You'd think we were a couple of 13-year-olds screaming that the backstreet boys were coming into town. But nope. We're getting front row and getting a money shot. Or 2. Over the next few days more tour dates popped up, by now everyone knew and would call me up as soon as another one was announced. Phone rang off the hook, "Hey Lis, another show! jacksonville on the 10th!" or "Hey Lis, guess what? I know you're fucked up in the head and you'll do it so GUESS WHAT?! Another show announced, Charlotte, North Carolina! Do it ya looney ass bitch!!" Alright, enough rambling, I'm getting ahead of myself! Time for lessons learned... LESSONS LEARNED: - 1,200 miles is longer than you think. Don't leave at 2am thinking you'll get there in time for the show. - Tires are sensitive things... bring extra $$ all the time cause chances are you'll need a new one after every trip. - Bring a bathing suit just in case, even if it's the winter time. Cause you never know! - Bringing your own food for a trip sounds like a good idea but it's a pain in the ass, goes bad, refilling the cooler with ice sucks esp. if you don't have a hotel to steal it from. Only take non-perishable stuff. - Bring extra pillows and blankies, more than ya think you'll need... - People in Alabama aren't as scary as you think... ROADTRIP PAGE |