tripfour2

TRIP FOUR - CON'T!!!

I felt bad... oh man, imagine having fans like this constantly chasing ya down... everyone knows GWAR fans are real weird so he's probably sick of this. Moo & I aren't normal either but the day I go to start a GWAR religion, shoot me. A few times. "Hey," I said to the kid, interrupting his verbal assault on 'Balsac'. I started talking with the kid, keeping his attention away from everyone else. I had to sit and listen to him ramble for what seemed like an hour... in that time, 'Balsac' took off running. Run, you're free! And you owe me, heh heh...
I was getting tired of hearin him and a bit creeped out myself so I decide it's time to drink! Man, I was doing so good with the sobriety thing too. Throw that to the wind. I left Moo to fend off the GWAR fan and apparently she had a blast. He asked her if she liked jokes, she said nope. She kept cutting him off till eventually he split. There were a few other bands playing before DBX and Disarray, I think. After a few drinks it was blurry. I met a guy who had a metal show who was going to interview one of them after the show, he was a good guy. Melissa watched me get shitty drunk... shitty drunk... shitty drunk... "another jack & coke, heavy on the jack!" I mumbled over and over... then I just got all emotional, started thinking too much... head started spinning. Remember when I talked about getting all your emotions out? Yeah... before I knew it I was standing and clutching onto the bar, facing Melissa, Vance, Moo, a few others and started to just cry and cry... I grabbed onto Moo and buried my face in her shoulder, hysterically crying, bawling, shaking, leaving a nice trail of snot all over her shirt perhaps. When I got that out of my system, I looked up and saw everyone looking at me with gazes of, "WTF?!?!" Later, Moo & Melissa would inform me that indeed I was a spectacle, everyone, EVERYONE noticed my meltdown and asked about my well-being and why I was crying. Poor Moo! Bear with me, since I can't remember the order of what happened next. Moo decided that maybe if I drank MORE it would be a good thing! One of the DBX camp approached her and asked wtf happened to me. "Oh, she's just dealing with some stuff... she's alright. I'm giving her more money to buy more booze!" she said proudly. He told her that that probably wasn't a good idea. Moo probably hoped that the more I drank the sooner I'd pass out and be outta her hair... poor Moo was used to dragging my drunk ass around at DBX shows by now.
I walked over to the bathroom at one point, Moo followed me (unknown to me) and flung open the door, I screamed, threw my drink to the floor, collapsed and burst into tears again. Alright, time for Lis to take a walk outside. I wanted some jolly ranchers, yeah, jolly ranchers sound good! They'd become a staple on the road, esp. watermelon ones. Moo just loves those watermelon jolly ranchers, dontcha Moo? ;)   Melissa walked me out to the car and cracked a joke about Moo shoving her dick in someone's mouth and I lost it. Hit the pavement, screamed laughing, nearly pissed myself and cried one last time but this time outta happiness.
I don't remember seeing Disarray at all... DBX was blurry at first, I was front row and the stage was high enough to where I could rest my elbows on it... ah, rest elbows... put head in hands... ZZzzzzZZzzZzZz... I don't know how long I was passed out for but suddenly I heard a yell of, "WAKE UP! GRAB A BRUSH, PUT ON A LIL MAKEUP!!!" Ah, System of a Down, I love those guys!!!! I opened my eyes and looked up then a wave of horror hit me as I saw Brockie staring at me and he obviously noticed I was passed out right in front of him. Half the crowd was looking at me and laughing as well... AHHHH!!! The show that nite was hilarious, he was constantly flipping the kilt up and mooning the crowd, we noticed that he got progressively more and more, eh, "open" about showing off. I must've still been buzzed cause I don't remember after the show either. But we were outside all putzing around. They were all staying at the same hotel and asked us if we wanted to hang out. Sure! The hotel we'd gotten earlier was some off-name ghetto miles away so we didn't hesitate. We didn't have any pillows, blankies, nothing. This was gonna be interesting.
We get there and everyone else decided to go swimming. Well... we didn't bring any bathing suits but then again didn't wanna watch T.V. so we headed out to the pool anyway and sat on the sunchairs. "Come in!" various people kept saying. "No, no no... don't have an extra change of clothes!" I woulda hopped in without a bathing suit if I just had a change of clothes but all our shit was at our hotel and there was no way in fuck I was skinny dipping. After about 10 mins of hearing this shit I pulled my shoes and jewelry off and just went for it... pants, top and all. Melissa & Moo shook their head at me, "It's gonna SUCK driving home in wet pants!!" Well, I'd drive back to our hotel naked I guess. Can't get the car all wet, now can we? I was sinking and couldn't stay afloat not to mention feeling lonely without my crew... Moo had on jncos which lord knows they NEVER dry so she had no choice but to stay on the sidelines. Until I started begging. "C'mon Moo, please?!?" Nope. "Melissa, please?!" She leaned over to me and said "Dude I'm not wearing a bra..." Oh, ok. "Moo, take your pants off then!" I suggested. People started hooting... oops, sorry Moo. Opened a can of worms! She had a real pained look on her face like I was asking her to dive head first into a pit full of snakes or something. I know she wanted to take a swim tho. "Alright, fine Moo... if I SWEAR to take my pants off, will you take yours off and hop in?" Moo knew that at that point in time I was real stuffy 'bout being in a pool without shorts and a tshirt on. This was before my whole "awakening" where I realized I love my body, blah blah blah. So her eyes widened and she said, "Yeah, if you take your pants off I'll definitely come in..."   I paddled to a deserted part of the pool and peeled them off then threw them as hard as I could right in her direction. "Hang 'em over the fence Moo and git in here!" I cried. I just thanked God that I wasn't wearing a thong that nite or anything with a gay ass pattern! Moo slowly crawled out of her pants and flung herself into the pool... "MELISSA!!! You have no excuse, get in!!" She smiled, "ahh what the fuck..." and hopped in. By then I was cold and clinging to Melissa half the time, teeth chattering and in a huddle. "Aaahhh iiittsss ssssoo ccccccoolddd!!!" we whined. Turns out the pool was closed and we all eventually got kicked out by management. "Um... someone best get me a towel, I ain't hopping outta here!" But of course, Moo, Melissa & I never grabbed towels cause we had no intention of swimming.   Not like there woulda been enough anyway. I grabbed my pants and wrapped them around my hips, I guess Moo did the same while poor Melissa just sat in her wet clothes all nite.
WTF was the name of that retarded movie... Jimmy Two Two meets the Hooded Fang or something? We were forced to watch this retarded flick since someone said, "Hey, this is a good movie!" but of course he fell asleep on top of the remote, leaving us to wallow in the misery of it's suckness. I peeled off my wet clothes and mummified myself in a towel that was donated to the cause. Ummm... how am I gonna sleep? I don't have any safety pins to hold this towel on and I know I'm gonna roll over or shift around... I stayed awake till everyone else crashed, then found a nook on the floor and rolled up in the towel. The next AM my clothes were still soaked and we had to get back to our hotel by 11am to check out. Next stop, Austin! Well, not really... next stop after checking out was to go back to their hotel and meet up for lunch while they got their oil changed. Went to this ghetto, deserted mall that apparently was the site of some shooting massacre, so it was almost totally abandoned. Creepy.
Austin was interesting, quite a collection of hardcore folk there! We got there stupidly early and walked around town a bit, found a cool shop that sold alot of rock memorabilia & I finally saw it.. the Holy Grail of rock shirts that I've wanted forever... W.A.S.P.'s "Animal" shirt!!!! OMG!!! Who cares if it's the wrong size, I snatched it up and wore it that nite, enjoying the weird stares I got since the back said, "I FUCK LIKE A BEAST!" Heh heh... the start of something beautiful. Without fail, from then on out whenever I wore that shirt I'd be asked, "Is it true?" I'd sigh and say, "No, I'm a loser and I've never scored but thanx for asking!"
We slept backstage for awhile, good lord we were tired. The show would wake us right the fuck up tho! We took our front row spots, Disarray did an awesome job but then things got weird when DBX hit. Brockie's bass kept fucking up for unknown reasons... kept stopping the show. The crowd was riotous drunk and this one guy who we affectionately called "GWAR FAN" kept sticking his face up and screaming, "WHAT IS UUPPP?!?!?"   Another guy decided it would be real funny to throw a beer bottle at one of them who was standing right next to a brick wall. It barely missed him and shattered right next to him, spraying him and the front row with glass shards. I'm shocked they didn't stop the show... Brockie eventually grabbed Vance's bass, still problems. Oh man, chaotic mess! And it all really got nuts when one chick snatched the setlist from Brockie's feet before the show was even over... NEXT!!!!!