Where We Belong
Part Nine
�Hey, sailor. Join a starving Marine to lunch?� He looked up at Mac as she moved into his office, startling him when she nudged the door shut behind her.
�Is everything okay?� he asked curiously, nodding his head toward the now closed door. In the month or so that they�d been together, they�d been very careful about maintaining appearances. Although there was nothing technically wrong with them dating, they didn�t want to give the Admiral a reason to doubt his decision to allow them to keep working together. His decision had come as a bit of a surprise; they had expected to be kept apart at work the moment he found out about them. But after assigning them a couple of cases against one another, and one where they worked together, he had called them into his office and told them that he was satisfied with their performance and as long as they kept their personal life out of the office, he would continue to allow them to work together. His support was unexpected, but very much appreciated. Especially by Harm, because it had gone a long way in convincing Mac that A.J.�s reasons for the whole Paraguay fiasco had nothing to do with her. Of course, having their therapist back it up had helped, too.
Suddenly, Harm knew the reason for the closed door. He had found a counselor for them, and one for Mattie, the Monday after they�d agreed to therapy. Fortunately, both Harm and Mac had liked his first choice. Dr. Walker was a clinical psychologist who specialized in helping couples who had been through traumatic events, and after spending an hour with her that Wednesday, they had both agreed that they had found someone they could talk to. Unlike Mattie, who despised her first counselor; and was only grudgingly talking to her second. Mac thought that it had more to do with being forced to face her emotions concerning her father than it did any animosity towards the counselors themselves, and Harm was inclined to agree. Still, she had agreed to try; and the three of them now spent one hour every Monday and Wednesday trying to sort out their lives with the help of trained professionals. Which led to some moments of intense emotional upheaval for all of them. Which led to one or more of them taking a step back from the others in an attempt to regain their balance. Which led to Mac sitting in front of him with a look of concern on her face.
Last night he�d had to relive his two weeks in the brig during the Singer trial; and it had been very draining for him. All he had wanted to do was to go home and curl up in bed, preferably with Mac in his arms. But Mac had taken her spare uniform out of his closet and sent it to the dry cleaners; which meant that she would have had to go home and get another and then drive all the way back to his place. She had been willing to do just that, but he hadn�t wanted her to make the drive. Too tired to put up much of a fight, she had agreed after extracting a promise that he would call her if he needed her. He hadn�t, so now she was here to make sure that he was okay.
�I�m alright,� he assured her with a smile, grateful for both her presence and her concern. �I just needed some time to unwind.�
�Okay,� she said softly, �As long as you got what you needed.�
�Most of what I needed,� he corrected her in a low voice, staring meaningfully at her. �I missed you last night.�
�It�s your own fault,� she retorted, blushing under his intense gaze, �You were the one who didn�t want me to come over.�
�No, I didn�t think it would be safe for you to come over. You were exhausted, Mac. You probably shouldn�t have even driven yourself home.�
She shrugged. �I made it home fine. Although I�ll admit that I didn�t even bother with dinner before I headed off to bed.�
�Which just proves my point,� he responded.
She rolled her eyes at him. �Yeah, well, it also made me extremely hungry, so can we please go and get some lunch?� she asked plaintively.
�Sarah Mackenzie is extremely hungry. Who�d have guessed?� he said with chuckle. She glared at him, but before she could say anything, he stood up and grabbed his cover. Flashing her a grin, he moved to the door. �Come on, Marine. Let�s eat.�
�So good,� she moaned. She shook her head in pity. �You don�t know what you�re missing.�
�And God willing, I never will,� he retorted, and took another bite of his salad. �So, are you coming over for dinner tonight?�
She took a moment to swallow before responding, �Depends on if you�re making something besides �Harm�s meatless meatloaf�.�
�Are you ever going to let that go?�
She pretended to ponder that for a moment. �Nope,� she said brightly, laughing when he stuck his tongue out at her. �I�m kidding, flyboy. And of course I�m coming over for dinner.�
�Good,� he said slowly, wondering if he should bring up the question he really wanted to ask her. Making a snap decision, he took a deep breath before continuing, �Because I�ve been looking around and I found a couple of houses that I want you to take a look at. If you like them, I thought we could take Mattie and go look at them this weekend.�
�Sounds like fun,� she said agreeably, �but shouldn�t you be worried about whether or not Mattie likes them? She�s the one who�s going to have to live there, after all.�
�Mattie said she liked them. I already asked her,� he said. He gazed at her meaningfully and went on, �I think it�s only fair that everyone who�s going to live in a house have a chance to decide what they want it to be like.�
�Well, sure. But that doesn�t explain why you want me to...� Mac�s eyes widened as she figured out where he was headed. She looked at him incredulously, the question plain in her eyes. Too nervous to speak, he just nodded. Her jaw dropped and the burger fell out of her hand.
�Are you-� her voice came out as little more than a squeak, so she cleared her throat and tried again. �Are you asking me to move in with you?�
�Yes,� he said, his voice soft but determined. He hadn�t planned on taking this step so soon, but when he reached out for her in the middle of the night last night and she wasn�t there, he decided that he didn�t want to waste any more time. He wanted to be able to sleep next to her every night, and to wake up with her every morning. He wanted to start his life with her, and he wanted it now. However, watching apprehensively as she just continued to gape at him, he began to think that maybe he had moved too fast.
�You don�t have to answer right away,� he said quickly, trying to backtrack. �I know this is sudden. But, well, we�ve talked about how we want to have a future together, and I just thought that since both of our leases were up in May, and I was looking anyway, that it would be a good time to take this step. But if you�re not ready-�
�Yes,� she blurted out, interrupting his rambling explanation.
�Yes?� Harm repeated dumbly. Unable to quite believe what he was hearing, he asked again. �Yes?�
�Yes,� Mac responded, and a beautiful, beaming smile lit up her face. She reached out and grabbed his hand. �Yes, I want to move in with you.�
Unable to come up with a suitable reply, Harm pulled her closer and kissed her thoroughly. When he pulled away a minute later, he took note of her flushed cheeks, swollen lips, and dazed expression, and couldn�t help the satisfied grin that crossed his face. He wanted to kiss her again, but unfortunately, recognizing that they were in uniform in a public place, he realized he couldn�t, so he tried to bring things back under control.
�So, um,� he trailed off as he realized he had no idea what to do next. After a minute, he looked at her helplessly and asked, �So now what?�
�Aren�t you supposed to know that?� she questioned him. She had managed to get herself mostly under control, although her cheeks were still a little red. �This was your idea, after all.�
�Yeah, well, when I thought about this, I never got past the part where you said yes or no,� he admitted sheepishly. �So I was kind of hoping that you knew what�s supposed to come next.�
�Still need me for the dispassionate plan, huh?� she chuckled.
He gazed at her intently. �Always,� he answered solemnly. Then he grinned suggestively, �And the passionate plans, too.�
She blushed. �Well, we uh, better stick to the dispassionate ones for now, flyboy,� she said, smiling shyly. She gave his hand a quick squeeze before releasing it and falling into what he privately referred to as her �Colonel mode�. He watched her face as she stepped back and looked at the situation dispassionately, trying to decide their next move.
�I think we should tell Mattie first,� she decided after a moment�s thought. �The three of us need to sit down and talk about what we want.�
�You�re not just talking about the house, are you?� Harm questioned.
�No,� she shook her head, �I�m not. Living together is going to be a big step Harm, and if we talk about it beforehand, we should be able to identify some of the problems before we actually move into the same house.�
�That makes sense,� he conceded. He sighed, �We should probably tell the Admiral pretty soon, too. Don�t you think?�
�Yeah, we should,� she agreed, � I mean, I don�t think it will be that big of a shock to him. He already knows that things are serious between us. So I�m sure he�s given at least a little thought about what he�s going to do once we go public.� Her voice rose hopefully, �Maybe he�s even figured out how to keep us both at JAG.�
�You think he�ll do that for us?� Harm asked hesitantly. He still wasn�t sure exactly where he stood with the Admiral these days. Although he had been less stiff and formal with them lately, Harm still felt like there was something hanging between them. But Mac just nodded confidently.
�He needs you,� she stated matter-of-factly. �He figured that out while you were gone. JAG just isn�t what it should be without you. And he can�t afford to lose me right now, either. Not when we�re just starting to get everything back under control.�
Harm noted that she didn�t say that the Admiral needed her, too, and made a note to bring it up at their next session with Dr. Walker. She needed to realize that she was just as much an integral part of JAG as he was. But it wouldn�t do any good to say anything now, so he let it go and focused on the logistics of everything. �You know it�s possible that even if he wants to, he won�t be able to keep us both.�
�I know,� she conceded, �And we need to prepare for that as well. But that�s another reason to tell him now; if he can�t do anything, we�ll have more time to figure out what to do from there.�
�Okay,� he agreed. Then he reached out and grabbed hold of her hand again. He said intently, �But I don�t want us to spend all of our time focused on work, Mac. You�re right; this is a big step. But it�s a good step, and I want to make sure we take the time to enjoy our happiness.�
She smiled, leaning over to brush her free hand across his cheek. �Don�t worry, flyboy. We�re going to have plenty of time to enjoy everything.� She grinned flirtatiously, �I guarantee it.�
Tuesday, three weeks later
JAG Headquarters
1230 EST
Harm was sitting hunched over his desk, desperately trying to figure out a way to convince the court that overwhelming stupidity was a legitimate defense, when a familiar and much welcome voice came from the doorway.
Thirty minutes later
Beltway Burgers
Harm watched with amusement as Mac devoured her burger with almost orgasmic pleasure. �Good?� he asked wryly.