The Next Conflicting Phase
Part Twelve
She had gone to Bethesda this morning to take care of the last of the tests before her surgery on Friday, and had hoped to meet him at the courthouse afterwards for Mattie�s guardianship hearing. Unfortunately, twenty minutes before the hearing was to begin, he got a frantic phone call from her telling him that they were so backed up that she was just being taken for her first test, and there was no way she was going to make it in time. Not that it would have changed the outcome of the hearing if she had been there; everything had been decided on before they�d even gone in. It was just a matter of getting the judge to sign off on it, which she did. But it was just one more thing that hadn�t gone their way, one more reason for Mac to feel like she was failing him.
Before he could carry that line of thought any further, Harm saw the Admiral make his way up the steps. He started to come to attention, but the older man waved him off. Holding out his hand, he wished Harm a merry Christmas, before turning and taking up position to Harm�s right.
�How did it go today?� he asked quietly, not wanting to draw attention to their conversation. He nodded a greeting to one of the officers passing by.
�It was what we expected, sir,� Harm replied, his voice a mixture of resignation and regret. �The judge agreed that the Patterson�s would be the best place for her at the moment, so they�ll be her foster parents for the next six months.�
�Mac told me on Monday that Mattie�s father had reentered the picture,� AJ asked curiously, �Did he put up a fight for custody?�
Harm shook his head. �He was going to,� he explained to the Admiral, �but Mac talked to him, got him to back down.�
In actuality, Mac had done more than just get him to back down. She went to Mr. Johnson, one alcoholic to another, and convinced him that he needed to get his life together before he could even think about taking care of Mattie again. She got him to agree to check himself into a rehab program, and in the meantime, to support the Patterson�s bid for temporary custody, on the condition that once he completed treatment, the judge would take another look at the case.
Caught up in his memories of the past few days, it took Harm a minute to realize that the Admiral was still talking to him. He shook his head to clear it and refocused his attention on his CO.
�Sorry, sir,� he apologized sheepishly, �I got lost in thought for a minute there.�
Actually, it was more like five minutes, but AJ didn�t bother to correct him. After the events of the past few weeks, he was amazed that Harm was able to concentrate on anything at all. So he just shrugged off the younger man�s apology and said, �I just asked how Mattie was taking everything.�
Harm didn�t answer immediately, and AJ used the opportunity to study his expression. He hadn�t tensed up at the question, which AJ took as a good sign, but his face held a sadness and weary resignation that indicated that things were still not well between his two senior officers and the young girl they had wanted so desperately to help.
�She�s taking it...as well as can be expected,� Harm finally said. He sighed. �She�s only seen Mac once since that day, when we went to tell her about the deal we made with her father, and she apologized again for what she said. But she still doesn�t want us to be a part of her life right now.�
�She gave us Christmas presents, though,� he added with forced good humor, trying to lighten the conversation a little.
�Well, that�s a good sign,� AJ acknowledged, and then told him gently, �She�s scared; too scared to deal with it all.�
�I know,� Harm agreed with a sad smile, �and I know that she has to come to terms with it on her own, but it�s still hard to accept.�
Hard for all of them, but especially on Mac. She had tried valiantly to pretend that she was okay, but everything that had happened in the past month, the waiting and the diagnosis, the doctors� visits and the tests, the loss of Mattie; they had all taken a heavy toll on her. Harm was forced to watch helplessly as she started to become depressed. He had tried to raise her spirits by getting things ready for Christmas, doing things like putting up the lights on the house one evening before he picked her up from the doctor�s. And she had helped him decorate the tree and shop for presents, trying to get into the spirit of the season, but he could tell that as much as she wanted to, she couldn�t get her heart to cooperate. In fact, the only time when she seemed truly happy about the approaching holidays was when they picked angels off the tree at the mall, and got to buy presents for kids who wouldn�t get them otherwise. The rest of the time she was just going through the motions.
AJ saw the worried look on Harm�s face, and empathized. But where Harm was only worried about Mac, he was concerned about both of them. He had watched them closely the past two weeks, and although they did a pretty good job hiding it from everyone else, it was easy for him to see how the strain of the situation was wearing them down. He was doing his best to help them, to rearrange schedules and cases so that they would have the time they needed without arousing everyone else�s suspicions, but he couldn�t help feeling that it wasn�t enough. There should be something more that he could do, but his position as their commanding officer prevented him from doing as much as he�d like. Today was a perfect example of that; when he�d found out that Mac was going to have to go for her final tests alone while Harm was at the custody hearing, he�d tried to rearrange his schedule so that he could go join her at Bethesda, at least for a while. But a surprise meeting with the SecNav had derailed his plans, and he�d been forced to let Mac deal with things on her own. It rankled him; and more and more these days he was wondering if his career was worth the cost he paid for it.
AJ�s attention was drawn across the street, where the familiar figure of his chief of staff was waiting to cross. Deciding that it would be best to give the two of them a couple of minutes alone, he turned to Harm and said, �I�m going to go inside now. I�ll make sure there�ll be seats for you and Mac.�
Harm had just seen Mac himself, so he understood what the Admiral was doing. Giving him a small, grateful smile, he responded, �Thank you, sir. We�ll be in soon.�
�Very good.� AJ saw Bud and Harriet approaching, and moved to head them off before they could engage Harm in conversation. �Lieutenants,� he called out pleasantly as he walked up to them, �Merry Christmas.�
Harm watched thankfully as the Admiral led the Roberts into the church, and then turned his attention to Mac as she joined him at the top of the stairs. �Hey, marine,� he greeted her softly. She managed a wan little smile.
�Hi,� she said, and Harm saw the fatigue in her eyes. She gestured to the door. �We should probably go inside. The service starts in seven minutes and fifty-two seconds, and we still have to find our seats.�
�The Admiral�s got it covered,� he reassured her. His voice lowered. �How did it go?� he asked in concern.
�Fine,� Mac answered woodenly, and turned to make her way inside. Harm stopped her, unwilling to accept her one-word answer, and she sighed in annoyance.
�Joe stopped by after all of the tests were done and looked them over,� she explained impatiently. �He said they looked pretty good. He offered to explain them all, but I didn�t want to wait around. So he said he�d see us on Friday. And that was it,� she said, unable to hide her exasperation, �I left the hospital and came here.�
�Okay,� Harm answered quietly, hurt by her attitude. He knew she was tired, and sick of all of the tests she had to go through, but he was concerned about her; he just wanted to make sure she was okay. But no matter what he said or did, it didn�t seem to be enough. He turned away wordlessly and took a step towards the door.
Mac saw the look on his face and sighed. She was sick and tired of the tests, but that was no reason to take it out on Harm. He was having just as hard a time with all of this as she was. She reached out and caught hold of his arm.
�Harm, I�m sorry,� she apologized softly, �I don�t mean to take my bad mood out on you.�
Harm searched her face for a moment, and seeing the sincerity in her eyes, nodded his head. �I know,� he told her understandingly. Covering her hand with his, he gave it a reassuring squeeze. He wanted to say more, but the service was about to start and they needed to get inside. Placing his hand at her back, he led her into the church. They quickly made their way up the aisle to the front pew and took their seats, with Mac sitting between Harm and the Admiral. Moments later, the choir filed into place, and the sound of carols filled the room.
Mac tried to let herself feel the joy and peace of the music, but it was difficult. It was difficult to feel anything but sadness and guilt. She had wanted so badly to make her and Harm�s first Christmas together a good one, to replace some of Harm�s bad memories of the day with the happy ones that they would make together. Instead, he would have memories of how she ruined the day by getting sick and losing them their chance with Mattie. And even though she knew that Harm didn�t see it that way or blame her for any of it, and even though she knew there was nothing she could have done to keep from getting sick, she couldn�t help but feel guilty for all of the misery she was bringing to his life right now. And what was worse was that he was trying so hard to make her feel better, and she just couldn�t seem to do it.
Suppressing a sigh, Mac managed to focus her attention on Chaplain Turner as he began to speak. After just a couple of minutes, she found herself wondering if Harm had talked to him recently, told him what was happening. Because it seemed like every word he was saying was directed right at her, especially the part about being too lost in her own misery. And the more she listened, the more she realized that it wasn�t life making her miserable; she was doing it to herself. She was so determined to feel guilty about what they had lost, that she was blinded to what she still had. She still had her job and her friends and some hope for her health, and most of all she had Harm. And even though things were uncertain and frightening, the fact that they were together to deal with all of those uncertainties made it a better Christmas than she had ever had before. And if she could get Harm to see it the same way, then maybe there was still a chance that she could make his memories of this Christmas happy ones.
Mac was so lost in thought that she barely noticed when the service ended, and everyone started filing out of the church. Her mind was so busy making plans and figuring out how to achieve her goal that she didn�t realize that they were the only ones left until Harm gently shook her arm. She gave him an apologetic look and let him lead her outside.
�Hey, are you okay?� Harm asked, concerned, when he saw the distracted look on her face. She nodded absently, staring off into the night, so he turned her gently around to face him. �Are you sure?�
She gave him a reassuring smile. �I�m sure.�
�Okay,� he said somewhat disbelievingly. He gestured over to where his car was parked. �I�m going to head over, then. You should go home. It�s cold, and you�ve had a long day.�
�I will. I promise,� she swore. Because they were both in uniform, she fought the urge to kiss him goodbye and settled for reaching out and squeezing his hand.
He nodded and returned the gesture. �I�ll hurry,� he assured her, but she stopped him with a quick shake of her head.
�No, you won�t,� she countered firmly. �You�ll take as much time as you need to.� She squeezed his hand. �Promise me.�
�Mac-� he started to protest, but stopped when he saw the warning look in her eyes. He sighed, �I promise.�
She smiled, satisfied with her victory. Uniforms or not, she risked leaning up and giving him a gentle kiss on the cheek. �Don�t forget to tell him Merry Christmas for me.�
�I won�t.� He headed down the steps, but turned once he reached the bottom. He looked back up at her, hesitant, but she just waved him on. He stared for one more long moment, before finally heading off to his car. Once he was out of sight, Mac hurried down the steps and across the street to her car. She had a lot to do before Harm came home.
Opening the door, he heard the soft strains of �White Christmas� coming from the stereo in the living room. He quickly shed his coat and dropped his cover on the table, and headed for the music, and hopefully Mac as well. He felt a momentary disappointment when he looked around and saw that the room was empty, until he noticed the fire burning cheerfully in the fireplace. Mac would never have lit the fire if she were going to bed, so he assumed that she was either in the bathroom or in the kitchen getting something to eat. He was about to go hunt for her, when he looked down at the coffee table and saw the plate of Christmas cookies lying there, along with something else that he couldn�t immediately identify. Moving closer, he was perplexed to see a pair of his pajama bottoms next to the plate, with a piece of paper folded on top of them. He picked it up, and read Mac�s handwritten note.
Get comfortable, eat some cookies, and pick out one present that you want to open tonight. I�ll join you soon. Love, Mac
Confused and intrigued, he dropped the note back on the table, picked up the pajamas, and headed to the small downstairs bath. Flipping on the light, he grinned when he saw his uniform hangar hooked onto the towel bar; Mac was obviously a marine on a mission. He didn�t know what had prompted the abrupt turnaround in her mood, but he wasn�t about to complain. He slipped out of his uniform with practiced ease, and was back in the living room in less than five minutes. He headed over to grab a cookie, and saw that there was now a mug of hot chocolate sitting next to it, with whipped cream and a sprinkle of cinnamon, just the way he liked it. Even better, he saw that Mac had laid the comforter from their bed on the floor in front of the Christmas tree. With a silly grin and a happy sigh, he picked up the plate and mug and moved over to the blanket, carefully easing himself and his snack to the ground. Setting the plate in his lap, he took a sip of the cocoa and surveyed the gifts spread out under the tree. There were more than when he left; and the large box wrapped in shiny gold paper with his name on it especially intrigued him. Setting the mug and the plate far enough to the side so that he could be sure he wouldn�t knock them over, he reached out to pick up his gift when he heard Mac�s soft voice behind him.
�Are you sure that�s the one you want to open?� she asked in a low, sultry tone, triggering a wave of heat in him that had nothing to do with the fire burning in the nearby fireplace.
�You have a better one?� he challenged huskily, keeping his back to her. He didn�t know what she was planning, but he had a feeling he was going to enjoy it immensely.
�Maybe.� Her voice was almost a purr. �But you�ll have to turn around to find out.�
Moving slowly, he turned around to face her. She was standing just inside the door, dressed in a short burgundy nightgown and matching robe that somehow managed to accentuate more than it covered. Her hair fell in soft waves around her face, and her skin seemed to shimmer in the firelight. She was the most exquisite creature he had ever seen, and he was so awestruck by her beauty that all he could do was stare.
Mac watched him watching her and tried to hide how nervous she felt. It had been a very long time since she had set out to deliberately seduce a man, and she felt as horribly awkward now as she did all those years ago. It didn�t help that his face was cast in shadows, making it impossible to see his expression. She felt the panic starting to rise, and forcefully shoved it down again. This wasn�t like the last time, when a young and insecure Sarah Mackenzie had given in to Chris�s repeated demands that she be more aggressive, only to have him ridicule her for her inexperience and discomfort. She wasn�t that young girl anymore, and more importantly, Harm wasn�t anything like Chris. He would never treat her the way Chris had, no matter how awkward she might be when it came to things like this. That�s why she wanted to do this for him, to show him that she trusted him enough to try again. However, if Harm didn�t say or do something soon, she was certain that this would be the last time she tried.
�Harm?� Mac�s voice, trembling and uncertain, broke through the haze of lust and love clouding Harm�s mind. That�s when he noticed how pale she had become, and the tension in her frame as she pushed herself off the wall to stand uneasily before him, her hands clasped tightly together in a vain attempt to hide her nerves. He cursed himself for his insensitivity, knowing how difficult it was for Mac to make any attempt to initiate lovemaking. The fact that she was doing it so boldly made him realize that she was indeed giving him a gift, not of her body but of her heart. She was showing him that she trusted him enough to overcome her fears and let him know how much she desired him, how much she needed him. And the best way he could thank her was to show her how much he desired and needed her as well. To show her how much he cherished the gift she was giving him.
�Come here, Mac,� he murmured, pouring all of the love and desire he felt for her into his words, letting it show on his face. He stood up and held out his hand, beckoning her forward. She came slowly, her steps hesitant at first. But as she drew closer, and she could see that his breathing was getting heavier and his eyes were filling with desire as he ran them up and down her frame, she felt her confidence began to reassert itself.
Adding a little sway to her hips, she crossed the last few feet to stand in front of him, and was rewarded for her efforts when he groaned low in his throat and pulled her tightly to him. Heat and warmth rushed through her body as she felt the evidence of her successful attempt at seduction pressed against her belly. With a proud feminine smile, she ran her hands provocatively up his chest. �So does this mean you�ve changed your mind about which present to open?�
�Definitely,� he replied huskily, delighting in the soft moan that escaped her as he let his hands trace the path his eyes had taken moments before. Before he got too carried away, he leaned down and gave her a gentle, loving kiss. �This is by far the best present I�ve ever gotten.�
Mac couldn�t help blushing at the raw need she heard in his voice, need that she had kindled in him. Trying to maintain her role as the seductress, she leaned up and pressed her cheek to his and whispered in his ear, �And how would you know that when you haven�t even started to unwrap it?�
�I can tell just by the bow,� he responded, reaching down and fingering the silk belt that was keeping her robe wrapped loosely around her waist. He teased her for a moment by sliding his hand into the gap above the belt, before wrapping his arms tightly around her and lifting her to him to give her a soul-searing kiss. When he finally set her down, she was leaning weak-kneed against him and gasping for breath. Without giving her time to recover, he yanked at the belt and untied the bow.
�I think it�s time to start the unwrapping,� he growled softly, and quickly slid the robe off her body. He gently lowered them both back down to the comforter, and then proceeded to remove the rest of her wrapping before beginning a thorough, erotic inspection of his gift. By the time he was done, Mac was writhing underneath him, lost in a wave of desire. And then suddenly it was his turn to be examined, as he found himself lying on his back while his marine scouted out the terrain before passionately claiming her territory.
Hours later, when they were finally spent, Harm got up long enough to drag the blanket off the back of the sofa while Mac quickly stoked the fire, and then they collapsed back onto the comforter.
Wrapping her arms around him, Mac leaned over and pressed a soft kiss to his chest before leaning up and whispering, �Merry Christmas, Harm.�
�The merriest I�ve ever had,� he told her lovingly as he watched the lights from the Christmas tree set her skin aglow. Reveling in this moment of perfect contentment, he pulled her closer until she was nestled against his side. She sighed happily.
�I love you,� she said, draping her arm around his waist and her leg over his. She yawned sleepily and laid her head against his shoulder.
�I love you, too, � Harm murmured as his eyes began to drift shut. Just before their breathing evened out and they both succumbed to exhaustion, he told her softly, �Merry Christmas, Sarah.�
Harm was the first to wake the next morning, when his back protested a night of sleeping on the floor. Not wanting to disturb Mac, he slid carefully from underneath the blanket and her arm. When she started to stir, he quickly placed his pillow next to her, and was relieved when she curled herself around it and settled back to sleep.
It was rare that he ever awoke before her, so Harm stopped for a moment and took the opportunity to just watch her sleep. She looked so beautiful lying there, with her face pressed against the pillow and her hair falling softly against her cheek. He could stare at her like this forever.
Or not. After a few minutes, his full bladder began to make itself known and he was forced to make his way upstairs to deal with it. While he was there, he decided that a quick shower and shave were in order. Thirty minutes later, he was clean and dressed and ready to head down to the kitchen to get breakfast ready for Mac when she woke up.
Unfortunately, Mac had other ideas. When he peeked his head into the living room, he saw that she was already awake, and had found her own breakfast. Dressed once again in her nightgown and robe, she was sitting on the sofa with the blanket around her shoulders, admiring the tree and happily devouring the remainder of the cookies. He should have known; shaking his head with a laugh, he made his way over to the couch.
�Merry Christmas,� he said, leaning over the back of the sofa and pressing his lips to her cheek. She smiled and turned her head, giving him a chance for a more thorough kiss.
�Mm,� she murmured happily when they finally separated, �Merry Christmas.� She picked up the last cookie and held it up, offering it to him.
Harm obligingly took a bite before handing it back to her. �How about some real breakfast?� he offered, brushing away a few crumbs from his face. One of them landed on Mac�s neck, but before she could reach up to remove it, Harm bent down even further and slowly licked it off. Mac moaned and turned around to face him.
�Breakfast later,� she told him breathlessly, leaning up and wrapping her arms around his neck. �There�s something more important we have to do first, don�t you think?�
�Absolutely,� he agreed fervently as his arms slid around her waist.
�I�m glad you agree,� she purred, and brushed her lips against his. Then, just as Harm moved to deepen the kiss, she slid out of his arms and off the sofa. Before he knew it, she had plopped herself down in front of the tree and started pulling at the presents. When he made no move to join her, she looked up at him innocently. Holding out a small box, she asked sweetly, �Don�t you want to open your presents?�
He glared at her from across the room, aroused, frustrated, and amused in spite of himself. He decided to play along, and gave her his best wounded puppy look. �That�s what I was trying to do,� he pouted, folding his arms across his chest. Mac just laughed and patted the spot next to her.
�These first,� she said, pointing at the wrapped packages under the tree. �And then, if I like what you got me,� she added seductively, �I might let you unwrap me again.�
�Deal,� he conceded at once, giving her a wolfish grin before bounding over the sofa and sitting down next to her. He started to reach for the biggest gift, the one he had looked at last night, but Mac quickly grabbed hold of his hand and pulled it back.
�That one last,� she told him firmly, sliding her leg out and nudging it away with her foot. He threw her the puppy look again, but she just shook her head, refusing to yield. Then he tried running his hand seductively up her leg, but she pushed him away. Realizing it was useless; he gave up with an exaggerated sigh.
�Fine,� he huffed in annoyance. Pointing to a similarly sized present with her name on it that she had been eyeing, he said smugly, �But the same goes for you. That one last.�
She opened her mouth to protest, but stopped when he raised an eyebrow challengingly. �Fine,� she said with feigned indifference. She reached for a smaller gift and was soon eagerly tearing away the paper. Harm smiled, amused by her childlike enthusiasm, before turning his attention to his own gifts.
They opened the packages from Mattie first, and found matching frames with a picture of the three of them standing in front of Harm�s plane. Attached to the back of the frames were cards that wished them a Merry Christmas and were signed, �Love, Mattie�. Since she had only given the gifts to Harm yesterday, they took that as a good sign. Mac wordlessly reached out and squeezed Harm�s hand, and he quickly returned it. After a minute, they looked at each other and silently agreed to let it go and move on. After giving her one last reassuring squeeze, he reached out and pulled out a small square box.
�Guess what this is.� He handed her the box, flashing his famous flyboy grin. Mac took one look at it and rolled her eyes.
�Hm, I wonder,� she said sarcastically, ripping off the paper to reveal the traditional box of perfume. Shaking her head in amusement, she leaned over and gave him a quick peck on the cheek before thrusting a similarly shaped box at him. Harm laughed when he opened it and found his favorite cologne.
They spent the better part of an hour unwrapping gifts large and small. Harm gave Mac an intricately woven silver bracelet, announcing with inordinate pride that he had picked it out all by himself. She loved it, and insisted that he put it on her wrist immediately. Then she handed him his next gift, which turned out to be a framed picture of their house to hang in his office. It had been taken in the fall, and the combination of the red and gold of the leaves with the red brick and white paint of the house was striking. Impressed, Harm asked her where she had gotten it, and was even more impressed when she shyly admitted that she had borrowed Meredith�s camera and taken it herself. He didn�t know she liked photography, and he wanted to ask her more about it, but she looked so embarrassed and uncomfortable by his attention that he let it go, not wanting to spoil their happy mood.
Finally, everything else was opened and only the two largest presents remained. Harm eagerly reached out and pulled his onto his lap, while Mac watched nervously. She had purchased this gift for him over a month ago, and while it had seemed like a good idea at the time, now she wondered if he would think it was childish and silly. All too soon, he was lifting the lid and peering inside, and she bit her lip as she anxiously awaited his reaction. As the moments ticked by and Harm just stared silently into the box, his expression unreadable, Mac�s heart sank.
Last August, when a heat wave had swept over D.C. and their apartments both felt like furnaces, Harm had told her about the snow filled Christmases he spent at his grandmother�s farm in Pennsylvania. Mac had listened with wistful envy as he had described the kind of family holiday she had dreamed about as a child. She had especially remembered the excited way he had talked about ice-skating on the pond nearby, and how he had looked forward to it every winter. And when she admitted that she had never been ice-skating; he had immediately promised to teach her. So when she had gone into the sports store looking for a present for Sturgis and had seen the skates on display, she had thought she found the perfect gift, something special that would remind him of happier times that they could now share together as adults. But the longer he stayed silent, the more convinced she was that she was wrong.
�I can take them back,� she finally blurted out, unable to take the tension. He looked up at her with startled eyes and opened his mouth to say something, but she was staring down at her hands and didn�t notice, just continued in a rush, �I still have the receipt, so I can find something else. It was a silly idea-�
�No, it wasn�t,� Harm said firmly, interrupting her nervous babbling. She looked up at him, eyes wide with disbelief and disappointment, so he repeated himself. �It wasn�t a silly idea.�
Before she could say anything in response, he pushed her gift towards her. �Open it,� he commanded gently. She bit her lip, and stared at him in confusion, so he set his box aside and placed hers in her lap. �Open it.�
Still unsure of his reaction, she hesitantly reached down and started peeling away the paper. As she focused her attention on her gift, she realized just how similar it was in shape and weight to his, and an impossible thought crossed her mind. She looked up at him, disbelieving.
�You didn�t,� she said incredulously, and the smallest of smiles appeared on his face. She began to hurriedly rip off the rest of the wrapping. �This isn�t-�
She cut off abruptly, reaching into the box and pulling out a pair of women�s ice skates. Harm couldn�t help laughing at the stunned look on her face. He was sure it was the look he had on his own when he�d opened his gift. He had never expected her to remember their conversation, or his off-handed promise, and had debated long and hard with himself over whether to buy the skates for her. Obviously, he had made the right decision.
�Great minds think alike,� he chuckled, pulling her, box and all, into his arms. She continued to stare at the skates, so he reached down and gently lifted her chin. �So do you like them?�
A huge smile broke across her face, and she dropped the skates back into the box and started smothering him with kisses. �I�ll take that as a yes.�
�I love them,� she exclaimed, punctuating her declaration with a few more kisses. She smiled happily at him. �I guess this means we�re going skating today.�
�Maybe later,� he told her huskily. He slid his hand down to her waist and loosened the belt of her robe. �First, I have one more present to unwrap.�
He laid her back on the blanket, and they made love again, slowly and sweetly. Afterwards, they dozed for a while on the sofa, and then got up and ate a leisurely breakfast. By the time they had showered and dressed, it was early afternoon, so they quickly packed up their things and set off. They stopped off at the Roberts residence to deliver presents to AJ and Jimmy, and entertained them for a bit while Bud and Harriet rushed to get things ready for Christmas dinner. But when the doorbell rang and Harriet�s parents came in, Harm and Mac quickly made their excuses and left, not wanting to spoil their day dealing with Mrs. Sims.
When they reached the ice-skating rink, and saw how crowded it was, Mac got cold feet. She knew that she was inevitably going to end up on her butt her first time out, and she didn�t want it to be in front of so many witnesses. It took Harm twenty minutes to convince her to try, and the moment they stepped onto the ice, she clutched at his hand and refused to let go. That would have been fine, except for the fact that Harm hadn�t been ice-skating since he was in his early teens. The first time a couple of kids bumped into him, he lost his balance and fell, taking Mac down with him. Fortunately, it broke the ice, so to speak, and they spent the next two-and-a-half hours alternating between slowly making their way around the rink, and falling down.
They returned home late and ate a large dinner, because Mac couldn�t eat anything after a certain time. Then, exhausted by the day�s events, they headed up to bed. Mac managed to doze off, but Harm couldn�t sleep, so he quietly headed back downstairs. Plugging the tree lights back in, he sat down on the sofa for a while, staring at the tree and going over the day�s events in his mind.
All of the sudden, he heard Christmas music come on from behind him as the familiar strains of Mac�s favorite Christmas song began to play. Soon, she was standing in front of him, so he held out his arms. She smiled and curled up in his lap, and together they sat silently gazing at the tree and the snow falling outside.
�What are you thinking?� she finally whispered softly, running soothing fingers through the hair at the back of his neck.
He gave her a loving smile and replied sincerely, �I�m thinking that this is the best Christmas I�ve ever had.�
Mac felt the warmth of love and contentment spread through her at his words, proud that she had managed to help give him happy memories of the day, despite the turmoil and uncertainty in their lives. And in doing so, she realized that she had been given the same thing. She smiled.
�It was mine, too. Thanks to you.� She couldn�t help a loud yawn from escaping. Deciding it would be futile to fight to stay awake, she snuggled deeper into his embrace and said sleepily, �We�re going to have a hard time topping this next Christmas.�
There was no hesitance in her voice as she mentioned next year, and it filled Harm with hope that they would be celebrating happy Christmases for years to come. With that in mind, he whispered softly to her, �I�m sure we�ll figure something out.�
�We always do,� she murmured just before she drifted off to sleep. Harm tightened his arms around her and settled himself more comfortably on the sofa. He pressed a kiss to her hair. �Yeah. We always do.�
And, with that comforting thought to sustain him, he closed his eyes and followed Mac into a dreamless sleep.
Christmas Eve
2046 EST
Harm stood on the steps outside the small church, nodding greetings to the men and women making their way inside, and trying not to panic. The service was scheduled to start in fourteen minutes, and Mac was nowhere to be found.
Harm and Mac�s house
2320 EST
When Harm finally made it home from the Wall, he was surprised to see that Mac had turned on the Christmas lights. It was the first time since he�d put them up that she�d done it without him having to ask. As he pulled into the driveway, he glanced at the living room window and saw that the tree was lit as well. Stepping out of the car, he took a minute to simply admire the picture that it made. It reminded him of the last Christmas he had spent with his father, on his grandmother�s farm in Pennsylvania, and it gave him the same warm, happy feeling now that it had when he was a child. Feeling better than he had in weeks, Harm marched up the front porch steps, determined to do whatever it took to get Mac happy and into the Christmas spirit.