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| The Housewife A lady was doing her laundry one day, and discovered that the dryer stopped getting hot. "Hey honey," she called to her husband, "the dryer's broke..can you fix it?" "Who do I look like...Kenmore repairman?" he replied. A few days later the dishwasher broke. "Hey honey," she called to her husband, "the dishwasher broke...can you fix it?" "Who do I look like...the Maytag man?" grumbled her husband. A few days later the oven broke. "Hey honey,"she called to her husband, "I can't fix dinner...the oven broke...can you fix it?" "Who do I look like...an oven repairman?" he yelled. A few weeks laterthe husband said to his wife, "Hey honey, I noticed you got all that stuff around the house fixed, how much did it cost?" "Well," the wife replied, "you know Bob next door? Well, he agreed to do all the repairs for free if I'd sleep with him or bake him a cake" Then the husband asked her, "what kind of cake did you make him?" And she replied, "Who do i look like... Betty Crocker?" |
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| One day a man comes home from work to find total mayhem at home. The kids were outside still in their pajamas playing in the mud and muck. There were empty food boxes and wrappers all around. As he proceeded into the house, he found an even bigger mess. Dishes on the counter, dog food spilled on the floor, a broken glass under the table, and a small pile of sand by the back door. The family room was strewn with toys and various items of clothing, and a lamp had been knocked over. He headed up the stairs, stepping over toys, to look for his wife. He was becoming worried that she may be ill, or that something had happened to her. He found her in the bedroom, still in bed with her pajamas on, reading a book. She looked up at him, smiled, and asked how his day went. He looked at her bewildered and asked, "what happened here today?" She again smiled and answered, "You know every day when you come home from work and ask me what I did today?" "Yes," was his reply. She answered, "Well, today I didn't do it!" |