| 10-15-2003; 10:01pm Lately, it feels like everyone's been lying to me. I guess I'm going crazy. I read some weird article about those elastic braclets all the kids wear, and how they're symbolic of sexual favors. I dunno, I remember couple girls I liked who wore them....makes me scared. My mind's wandering more than I ever really want it to....scares me sometimes. I really miss Glynnes. I've been listening to John Cougar Mellencamp..."hang on to 16 as long as you can....soon after that, you'll be swimming in men....I'm going to lose Glynnes. 10-12-2003; 6:36pm Well, I actually did attend the MousePlanet.com potluck yesterday. I can gladly say I'm pretty much the youngest person there, children of members not withstanding. I'm also the closest thing to an ethnic minority, so that is kind of cool. What really makes me happy is that I finally got my MP members pin, which should make a good replacement for Holly's pin, which I am retiring. 10-9-2003; 7:27pm Nothing new. My dad cares more about the DTV than whatever goes on in my life. Meh. 10-7-2003; 7:57pm Still tired, still bored. Nothing new going on here...although, my English Class writing assignment is about The White Stripes, so that's kinda fun. But other than that, nothing new...at all. *sigh* 10-5-2003; 9:18pm It seems, I've forgotten why I still go on, again. I'm a liability to my parents. They just treat me like they're just waiting for me to go away. I can do nothing right in their eyes. When I screw up, I never hear the end of it. I give up, people. You fucking brought me into this world, why the hell can't you take me out. You're better off putting a bullet in my damn head than dealing with my minor bullshit, which you make into huge fucking problems. That's all I am to you, isn't it, mom and dad? I should be killed, before I end up hurting someone else. I'll never be loved. Everyone's lying to me. I'm not "just a friend", I'm just NOT anything, to anyone. Useless. 10-2-2003; 9:06pm This whole Halloween thing is getting to me. Why else would I be collecting sticks, and whittling and sanding them down to make wands? I'm not some dirty hippie pagan who calls magic "magick"... Anyways, I'm feeling better, because it's Thursday night, and I don't have class tomorrow. Things have been getting sort of strange in my head lately. I have this sort of a crush on a lady I see on campus everyday or so. Her office is in the Writing Center computer lab. She's sort of attractive. I don't think I could really talk to her, since she's faculty, and I'm just a dopey freshman. I'm learning to to panic without Glynnes. I'll be seeing her a lot more, and Amy too, I'm joining up as "creative outside consultant" for Kennedy Night at the Improv 2003. I'm shooting for a "celebrity guest host" spot as well...hm, that'd make a good t-shirt, "Celebrity Guest Host". 9-28-2003; 9:00pm Good lord, be wary of Halloween Club shops. It's a veritable impulse buy heaven in there. I bought these crappy Morpheus shades....the kind that clip on. Except, they don't clip on. I blame my flat Filipino Nose. Christ...but other than that, I'm quite peachy at the moment. My brain settled down. Glynnes came back from that disapperance that's been troubling me. I'm okay folks, I am okay. |