| 3-2-2004; 9:06pm I think I've had too much. I'm sick, I'm having an allergic reaction from hell, I'm just in pain in general, I'm losing my mind. I'm feeling overloaded in class...cripes. I just want to take a month off, and disappear for a while. Excuse me while I go insane. Eh, who cares? I'll just fall apart, and rebuild myself, like I ALWAYS FUCKING DO. Blech. 2-29-2004; 1:09pm Not that I have anything particularly important to say, it's just that I only get this chance once, every four years. Happy Leap-Year Day, folks. 2-28-2004; 10:36pm Strangely enough, everytime I consult my Magic 8-ball about the situation I cited in my last entry, it tells me that I'm doing what's best... 2-27-2004; 8:50pm Song of the Moment: Is She Really Going Out With Him? ~ Elvis Costello Version Mood: Same old, same old shit. Why can't I just drop this fiasco I've made for myself with Glynnes? Why can't I walk away? Why can't I accept being "JUST-a-FRIEND(tm)"? ...I bet she'd like me if I had my own car and stuff like that, y'know, like those cool guys she usually gets rides from. Who am I trying to kid? (-Ed. yourself, stupid) I can't compete, I can't win, I'm not good enough. Cripes, this is the same shit I've been spouting off since this blog began back in July. And now that long-haired deliquent is trying to advise me by telling me how poorly I treat Glynnes. Fucking shoot me now. Why can't she just hate me instead? No, no, I did this to myself, I deserve it. Yeah, I'm a terrible fucker. 2-25-2004; 10:42pm If no one talks to me, nothing bad will happen. Bullshit. The question is, do I really miss it? Should I talk to Glynnes? I ask this every time, and every time the end result is no, I shouldn't have. Maybe it'll be different this time. Maybe this time...maybe. Fuck you, Josh. 2-24-2004; 10:08pm Let's recap. I have homework that I SHOULD do, but am not doing. (But I promise I'll get around to it.) I know quite a few girls...that don't seem quite interested. I walk a fine line, you see. A fine, fine line between a "lover" and a "waste of time". I feel like disappearing. I can't find a purpose. I'd sure as hell love to take a break from everything. I'd love to just stop thinking for a week or so, with no need to worry about finishing this, and getting around to that. No goals, no purpose, no need to worry. I want to live in a dream world. ...I need to wake up. 2-23-2004 Is there something wrong with trying to justify murder to yourself, in your own head? Alright...just checking. So, anyway...did I tell you yet about how I recruited a girl? Yes, a girl came up to me while I held down the table for Vic and the boys...and she talked to me again today. I dunno, my dumb guy instincts tell me to hit on her, but I won't. At least, not now anyways. |