| 12-13-2003; 9:13pm I don't know what the hell's going on with me. I'm still fucked up in the shoulder/back pain department. Anyways, I've been looking at some reasonably old photos of me with Glynnes' family at Disneyland. Sadly, I don't have any with her hot mom...uhm, disregard that last part. Anyways, here's something else you should disregard, but I can't help but notice how "stacked" Glynnes looks in those kinds of tops....*sigh* 12-12-2003; 7:55pm I can't believe the sheer fucking amount of pain I've been experiencing lately. Physical, not emotional. This really sucks. I should see a doctor, but I won't. I should at least chronicle what I've been having. Pain in my left ankle, right foot, left rear shoulder, chest pains. Shite. Glynnes is pressuring me to go see her shows, and Whitsett's giving her a hand, it seems. I suppose I could go to the Christmas choir show next week with Whitsett, maybe even get something to eat with her. Just a friendly luncheon sort of deal. Next semester will not hurt as much as this one did, I'm not fucking this up, I have a plan (sort of). 12-6-2003; 10:00am What can I say? I've been bloody busy....doing my usual bouts of nothing. Well, I have 3 days left of school, then it's the sporadic finals schedule, which just means I get a few more days off. I'm going to fail Counseling, but then again, I have no idea what the hell I'm doing in that class anyways. I just kinda feel bad for 'leading' Penny on like that...what the hell was I doing in that class, indeed. Well, aside from that, nothing's really changing. I don't talk to Amy at all anymore, which is probably for the better. Glynnes...I still like her, but I highly doubt anything will happen between me and her, no matter how soft and warm I think she is. But, at least I know how to knot my own neckties now. Yeah, I bought some ties, nice ones, too. 12-1-2003; 6:48pm It's crunch time, I guess. Well, my birthday is on Finals week...so what? I don't have anything to look forward to. No friends to fall back on, no one to tell me that they love me...a crazy family that I just want out of...and well, things just aren't looking up. That's my life, folks. 11-30-2003; 8:02pm Oh, you know me, just the usual 'going nowhere' thing. *sigh* 11-25-2003; 7:22pm I got pounced today, by Glynnes of all people. It seems she finally noticed I've been trying to drop her. Well, I don't know what to make of this ruddy situation. I was avoiding her, so I'd relieve myself of the urge to hit on her, much less try to fondle her, anymore. (sadly, that's the truth...). I was cutting myself off, to keep some semblance of sanity on my part. I'm not good at explaining anything to do, to anyone, so when I tried to talk to her about it, I just came off as a bigger, meaner dork than ever. I honestly don't know what the hell I'm doing. I just wanted to 'leave her be'... 11-22-2003; 9:40pm I do not believe I just did that too myself. I guess I could call it giving back to the community. Special Celebrity Guest Host, my ass. God, I'm such a dork. But, at least I gave myself a little closure between myself, Glynnes and Amy. I think, anyways. I'm not feeling so guilty and full of regret about them. Now, my stress is just firmly due to classes right now. 11-19-2003; 6:16pm I am about to make the same foolish mistakes all over again. I don't love Glynnes, I don't love Amy. I'm not meant for either one of them. I will say I will ignore them. Yet, when I see them, I will fall right back in. Idiot me. |