Things I learnt in Band
Things I learnt in a concert-band-which-used-to-be-a-marching-band-and-now-wants-to-be-one-again.
- Recruits ALWAYS get the spoilt, smelly and oxidating instruments which are at least ten years old.
- Ancient flutes can look amazingly like lightsabres if they've oxidated to the point where most of it is green.
- There are disadvantages to sitting next to the piccolo player.
- If you stick a wet oboe reed into an air-tight container, you can send it in as a science project a few days later as an example of 'How To Grow Mould'.
- When you're supposed to be standing at attention, you better stand at attention; it doesn't make any difference if there happens to be a couple of dangerous-looking centipedes examining your shoe.
- My oboe reed smells like white glue. Is it considered glue-sniffing? *sniff sniff* Can people get addicted to reed-sniffing?
- If you value your life, you should not treat your instrument as a Jedi weapon and go swordfight with another band member, regardless of how much it looks like a lightsabre. Band majors can never see the resemblance.
- Ringing handphones in the middle of band practice are not allowed, unless it happens to be the conductor's.
- After band, your holidays will never be the same again.
All the content on this site © 2004 A.S.Q