Ask Keith page1

The Mail BAG!
Page 1, 2, 3

 

Hey Keith,
How do you relieve all the tension you must be feeling over being in love with Allura and not being able to act on it?
Anonymous
[email protected]

“Lance! You better learn how to screen your e-mail address better ol buddy. You are now officially on graveyard shift for the next month! As to your question, ignoring your assumption of love, I suppose I take out my frustrations on my lowly, double-crossing, and conniving teammates. Oh and the Red is due for its complete diagnostic this week isn’t it?”

Keith

So Keith,
Have you ever actually broken any rules, or are you always this much of a goodie two-shoes?
P.O.D.
[email protected]

“Pod? Weird name... So, I'm a goodie two-shoes? Just because I follow the rules? Rules are used by civilized societies to keep order and should be upheld…Wait a minute… P.O.D.? Well that figures. What would you know about following the rules anyway? Princey my way or The Pit. Never mind, I’ll spare you the lecture.”

“What! No lecture? No preachy goody-goody stuff? First time for everything I suppose.”

“Lance will you get lost!”

“Hey! Ouch!”

“Hrumf”
Keith

Honorable Captain,
May I take the impudence to ask you where did you go to buy that jumpsuit of yours? You know, I would like to change my look for my next aerobic lessons and I was wondering where to buy a cool jumpsuit like that!^_^
Thank you, Captain, keep up your great work in kicking Robest ass!
Flora

“Finally, someone who understands the functionality of my clothing of choice. My red jumpsuit is standard issue Galaxy Garrison old school, before they went to the current look. You should be able to pick one up at any of the G.G. surplus stores in your area. Red is hard to come by as it was only issued to those in command, but you should be able to get one in green or brown pretty easily.”

“As to why I still wear it… as everyone always wants to know…Well, I hate the new G.G uniforms. The fabric is cheap, budget cuts and all, it doesn’t breath well and just isn’t as durable as the old ones. And yes, I do have a closet full of them and don’t wear the same one over and over. Really!”

“Now to that other inevitable question… Why do I wear a uniform all the time and the others don’t? I just feel more professional in a uniform. It wouldn’t be right for the commander of Voltron to be out of uniform while at work. And, yes I am always at work. We are all technically supposed to be in uniform being Galaxy Garrison officers. But on this rule… well, I’m lax and I let the guys, when they are not piloting, get away with not wearing one. Why? Well, it makes them happy. See Pod boy, I’m willing to bend!”

“Now you might want to ask Lance, Pidge and Hunk why they always wear the same civilian clothes all the time. Was there some great sale on blue tee shirts and tan slacks that I missed? Have you ever washed a leather jacket? Neither has he!”

Keith

Keith,
Do you ever plan on telling Allura you love her or are you going to just moon after her forever?
J.
[email protected]

“Subtle, buddy, subtle.You been talking to Lance? What is it with you guys! Allura is the Princess of Planet Arus. I am Captain of the Voltron force! Period!”

Keith

Hi Keith...

Question for you...
Who would be your choice for best man at your wedding to our wonderful Princess of Arus, Allura???? Lance, Hunk, Pidge or Lotor? (assuming of course, that Coran will give the royal bride away!)
And...
Do you care if Allura plans a HUGE ball-like wedding... or a smaller, more personal wedding...and why? And... can I be invited???

Thanks!!
Adele

“My wedding? What are you talking about? Uh… ahem... You can’t mean Allura and I? I mean that just can’t happen… I mean I…..well…we…her and I…we…ugh…”

Long pause

“Allura is the Princess of Planet Arus. I am Captain of the Voltron force and well ...that's that. She is to marry a prince... not a pilot... not...uh...”

Another long pause…

“As to what Princess Allura’s wedding will be like and for an invitation. I think you need to contact Nanny about that. I don’t believe Allu…I mean The Princess has any say one way or another as to what her wedding will be like or who they are going to force her to… to…”

Yet another long pause…

Silence...

Silence...

“Talk to Nanny!”

(A chair scrapes across the floor, footsteps fade and a door swooshes open then closed.)
Oops! I guess that’s the end of that transmission!
Moira

Keith
So did a bunch of girls really put ribbons in your hair and dress you up like a girl when you were a little kid?
Mrs. CaptJack
[email protected]

"NO! That is Moira’s version of the events of my childhood and has no relevance to anything that may or may not have happened to me as a kid.
No, I did not have red bows in my hair!"

Keith

Mrs. Cap Jack's reply to his post.
Gee, Keith. Defensive much? And how funny you should mention red bows. I never specified a colour. So then they were red, hmmm?

(I wasn’t able to get any further response from him on this subject.)
Moira

Keith,
How are you planning to ask Allura to marry you?
Anonymous
[email protected]

“Aghhhhh!”

Hi Keith...

Um...I'm a single, sweet thing from the village of Candor on Arus. Are you and the Princess solid...or can I have a shot at you too???
Sighs....
^ _ ~

You’re adoring secret admirer from afar....
(Can’t say my name, in case the Princess is monitoring this!!! She might have me beheaded or something!!!)

Faints dead away.... with a gentle sigh.....

“Uh…Hi uh…ahem, Sweet Thing?”
“Well, uh, we are… um… cough, cough.” He clears his throat. “Um, Allur…The Princess and I…we are…”
Mutes transmission
Switches back on
“I am flatted that you would think of me that way, but, ask any of the guys and they’ll tell you I’m impossible to live with. My job makes it impossible for me to even think about dating anyone, if that is what you are referring to. You should find someone who could dedicate their life to you, pelage their allegiance to you and be there for you whenever you need rescuing… wait… wha…rescuing where’d that… ” he mutters something incompressible…
“I’m sure there’s someone out there for you.”
(Transition cuts off abruptly.)

Dear Captain-

From one group leader to another, can you give me any tips to keep my clients workin' hard during class sessions? What kind of motivation do you use to keep the team focused on their drills?

Any thoughts on potential topics for the next chapters of my fan-fic? ;)

Cheers-
Princess Evality

"Greetings Your Highness,"

“I have one word for you…‘TEAM’ that is the thing you need to always remind them of… ‘TEAM’”

“If you keep reminding them they are a team and not just individuals this inspires them to want to individually work harder for the greater good. People will often work much harder as a member of a group than they ever would own their own. Peer pressure is a great tool, use it to your advantage.”

“Let’s go Team! Great Job Team! Always keep the group mentality first and foremost in your mind and theirs.”

“Fan Fiction. Now that’s a loaded topic. I understand that Allura and I are public figures and people always fantasize about the secret lives of public figures. Now I know it’s fun to sit safe at home back on earth and imagine all these romantic things that could be going on out in space in and in and around the Castle of Lions. It is called fan fiction for a reason. It’s fiction! Fighting Robeasts, witches, and robots, talking to spirits and space mice, giant mechanical lions that shapeshift into a giant robot, a castle that can transform into a super fortress. That’s real life, not all that romance crap! Write about real life!”

“Sorry about the language but it’s embarrassing. I mean you guys always have Allura and I…well…in rather compromising situations and well, it makes me wonder what if… uh I mean…it makes me wonder what… “

“Oh never mind.”

Captain Keith,

So, you're always in uniform and you're always on duty? You need to find yourself a girl, mate. Or, perhaps the reason you're always working is that you've already found one and are otherwise incapable of wooing said strumpet? You're not a eunuch, are you?
Captain Jack Sparrow
[email protected]

"Captain Jack?"

"What military are you with because you are obviously not Galaxy Garrison material? A eunuch? Is that the best you can do? Just because I know how to follow protocol you call me a eunuch? My job is to protect Arus not to bed the princess. Hmm, you must work for Lotor."

Captain Keith

Cap Jack's reply to his post...

Sort of with me own branch of service, mate. Not too good at following
orders and such. Notice you still didn't answer the question though. Did
it hurt?

Captain Jack Sparrow
[email protected]

"Did What hurt?"

Snip, snip.

Captain Jack Sparrow
[email protected]

Jack, darling, of course he's not a eunuch. He's much to lovesick to be a eunuch. He's obviously a virgin. Come to bed.

Mrs. CaptJack
[email protected]

"You are sick! ....Both of you! My history, as it were, is no concern of yours!"

Keith

See, Jack, you hurt his feelings. You simply must apologize for calling him
a eunuch. Virgins are quite sensitive about such things.

Mrs. CaptJack
[email protected]

I'm not apologizing. The man needs to bed his woman and be done with it.
Then we could have a wedding. I love weddings! Drinks all round!

Captain Jack Sparrow
[email protected]

"Here we go with the wedding thing again. Listen up people, Allura and I can’t get married! Got it! No matter how much she or I might want to… it just can’t happen Do you understand!”

Keith

Dear Keith,

Why can you for once in your life act like you don't have a stick jammed up
your butt?! I mean you're all work and no play kinda guy! Don't cha know how
to relax and have fun? Maybe I should send ya websites with some lovely
'pictures' of the Princess, would that help ya a bit?

Lady CyberDragon: SYLVER! *whacks him on the head*
Sylver: What?! I'm only giving him some quality entertainment! :D

*whacks him again*

Sylver: Ooow! Okay then! Sheesh! Forget I said anything, before master gives
me the Oversized Hammer of DOOM! *insert suspense music*
......Aw hell with it, I'm outta here!

~Sylver the Dragon (and LCD)

Dear Sylver,

Your letter really made me stop and re-think my life. You're right, I am a workaholic. I should take a hint from my teammates and let my hair down every once and a while. I mean what could it really hurt. Look at Lance for instance. He is an awesome pilot and officer when he needs to be, but boy can he relax and let it all go when he's off duty. Heck, I feel like doing something crazy right now. I know, I'm gonna march right over to the princess and tell her... no, no I'm just gonna kiss her! Thanks for the kick in the butt Sylver I needed that!

Now about those websites. Could you send em to redlionpilot@...

"Lance! What are you doing on my computer?"

"Uh, nothing uh Keith I just..."

"Lance?... What are you hiding?"

"Nothing I was just... Hey...ughggg...
Kei....th...I.....can...t....bre...at...h."

"Good...Now lets see here...Keith...once in your life...Stick up my what!...Don't cha know how to relax... some lovely pictures of... What! Oh no... Lance you didn't..."

"Guurrrrgle."

"...Silver, You... made me re think my life?... Look at Lance...awesome, pilot and officer when he needs to be! Ha!... This is rich... I'm gonna march right over to the princess and tell her... no, no I'm just gonna kiss
her! What! Oh Lance... ohhhhhh, Lance."

"urckg...Hur...tin....gggg...meee..."

"Shut up! ... Thanks for the kick in the...? Oh you're Dead..."

"Ke...ith....I.....nnnnnaaahh."

"Now about those websites. Could you send em to redlionpilot@... Oh you are sooooo dead mister! How could you even think to... You want to see Allura...? Oh you are dead."

Thunk. "Cough, cough... I'm... cough... sorry I... Keith?...Why are you looking at me like that? It was just some fun. I really wasn't going too...Keith? ... Keith stop looking at me like.... ughh Keith... Aghhhh!"

"Oh you better run Lion Boy!"

Dear Comm. Keith,
Have you ever considered donning on a pair of denim blue jeans? Because I think that instead of MOST of the women on Arus, ALL of the woman of Arus would want you. On a serious note, What’s your favorite way of relaxing yourself?
Sweety

“Hi Sweety?… another one???”
“Um. well uh… I don’t think your conclusion is accurate. You see, believe it or not when back on earth and not on duty I used to live in blue jeans. Honest. But since moving to Arus well there isn’t much opportunity to relax and just hang out. I tried wearing them a few months ago when I was going to help the princess and her maids out in the garden. Well I don’t think they had ever seen that kind of clothing before. They just kept giving me strange looks and didn’t get much work done. So into the closet they went and there they stay. Oh well…”
“As for what I do to relax, well I love a good book. Then there’s always Tai Chi. That’s great for unwinding. I have been know to on occasion go out and sit next to the Black and just enjoy the view. Basically alone and quite, that’s what I like. Boring eh. I know but that’s me. Boring Keith.”

Sweety's response to Keith's answer...
Tai Chi? boring? Are you kidding me? I love Tai-Chi! And neh..then the women of Terra are blind ;)

Sweety,
Boring? No way! Tai Chi is anything but...I just find that people find me boring because I do it so much. I tried to get the team to do it with me. Lance could never get it. ‘Flow my what?’ He would always ask. ‘Your Chi Lance… your energy…’ Soon they all quit. Well no, actually the princess didn’t quit. We used to get up an hour early go out in the garden together and greet the sunrise while going through the form. Bun now she is to busy in the morning to do it with me anymore, something Nanny has her now studying. I tried to explain to Nanny how Tai Chi would help Allura with her self-defense but she would hear nothing of it. I miss that time we had It was a nice way to start the day.

Keith
Blind, no, I think they see just fine.

Hi Keith,
You and the Princess eeh? *wiggles eyebrows suggestively* any chance that you did…more than Tai Chi? *smirks*
And the fact that the maids kept staring at you, and not doing their work...doesn't that say to you that you were looking more dashing that usual?
*snorts* and If you're boring, then I'm the Queen of Pollux. Which i'm not.
P.S - Keep up the good loo...errr...job! And please never EVER consider getting a haircut... please?

Sumayyah 'Sweety' Rafiq

"Look, Cheesy jumped out of nowhere and scared Allura making her fall into me while in white crane. We were not, I repeat not rolling around in the grass together as many choose to believe."

"So, you think they were staring because they liked how I looked? Really? I never thought that they might have… I mean there was a lot of giggling and whispering… No, they had to have been making jokes. And well sweet Allura must have been embarrassed for me. She never would look at me. Well okay, she looked at me but always looked away when I would ask her something. I also remember it was a really hot day out and she didn’t look at all well. I remember asking her if she was alright or if she needed water or anything. I think the heat must have gotten to her. She was acting really weird and kept having me walk over here walk over there… “Can you carry that over there Keith?”… “Here?”… “No further.” She’s not normally that indecisive. Weird. But like I said it was really hot. Later, after I had planted all of the trees, I brought her a cool drink of water and she almost fainted from the heat. Luckily I got there just in time to catch her. I had to use my tee shirt and the cold water on her head to cool her off. Nothing else got done after that. Everyone just watched until Nanny arrived. Heat exhaustion was the doctor’s diagnosis. For weeks after that every time I walked passed any of the maids they would just giggle and Allura wouldn’t look at me or talk to me either. Bad enough she fell ill from the heat and was embarrassed by that, I embarrassed her and that is a horrible felling that I don’t want to experience again. So, no more jeans for me. At least on Arus anyway.
Hey, Sweety, did you know in both instances Nanny made it from the top observation deck to the garden in under a minute? It takes me at least three. Wonder how she does it?"

Keith
And don’t worry, I like my hair too!

One minute? Wow...But I guess only Nanny knows how to do that.....I best get going *bows* Pleasure corresponding with you Commander. And I hope you will send or at least inform me when you get married to Allura.
And no, I haven't been talking with Lance *Goes to hide behind Lance*

“I AM NOT MARRYING ALLURA! AGHHHHHH!!!”
“Ummm… sorry… eh… it’s been nice talking to you, Sweety.”

Keith

Hey Keith, ole' buddy!

Jeff here! Its kind of boring here on the Explorer and well, Ginger's starting to get mad at all the blonde jokes that Cliff and I are throwing her way...

“Heh, sounds like you two But then again I’m sure Cliff has heard them all! Lucky you don’t live here or you would have been belted long ago!”

…Listen... I've to got a question for you!
Lisa and I are having some problems understanding each other. She thinks I'm not dedicated enough....and I'm too critical....especially when it comes to the food being dished out around here... YUK! And that I haven't got a romantic bone in my body!…

“That because you don’t listen my friend. You’re so used to barking out orders that you don’t hear what’s right in front of you. I’m sure you can think of something you could do for her. Find out some usual thing that that she likes. Oh, I don’t know. maybe a type of rare flower or something. Try and get that for her.”

…Anyway, I know that you and I are kind of cut from the same cloth. Okay… maybe not the same cloth...maybe a I'm cut from the scraps of the cloth that you were cut from...but ANYWAY....getting to the point here....

“Scraps of the same cloth? Jeff are you crazy? You must be loosing it.”

…Lisa says I'm not serious enough. She's been yelling her head off about me being more dedicated to her instead of waffling back and forth... I know you don't have that problem...being that you've never attached yourself to anyone…

“Whoa back up the shuttle… Are you are serious? I mean you and Lisa were well always friendly and you told me about that necklace she gave you but… You’re not talking the M word are you? Look, just because I have remained unattached doesn’t mean it’s the right thing for you. Just follow your heart. If you love her, why not? But how are you going to get around G.G. regs? I suppose technically Cric is her direct superior so you could probably get around it that way.”

…Oh....wait... didn't Lance send me something a few months back...let me think.... uh... hmm.... OH YEAH!!! I remember now! I guess you and the Princess got into it at some point over something that you said to her. Let me see...now...what was it he said again... OH YEAH!!!
He said that you started spewing out this line to Princess Allura about her being a Princess and you being a pilot and the two don't mix. But then, you kissed her on the cheek out on the balcony during one of those royal things she throws... and Lance caught you both.... and has never let either of you hear the end of it!!!! HAHAHAHAHA…

“What! Damnit Lance! I didn’t kiss her! Jeff, Lance is… misleading you. I never kissed her! I was whispering something to her when Lance walked in, she turned her head and well…I didn’t kiss her! Anyway, we are what we are… She IS a princess and I AM a pilot and the two do not mix! Last I checked I’m not a prince so why bother even entertaining the thought.”

…Sounds to me, Keith, like you just can't make up your mind!!! …

“Ugh…”

…So...why am I asking YOU for female advice???? You don't even know what to do with the one that's practically throwing herself at your feet!!!…

“She’s not interested in just a pilot! Will you get over it.”

Sheesh....forget I asked!
Thanks for nothing, PAL!!!!

JEFF

“Thanks for nothing PAL? The one guy I figured I could rely on I find is no better than the rest. Why won’t you guys let up on all this Princess stuff? Look, this planet has more regulations than G.G. on who can marry who. And, I have been told by Allura’s governess, with no uncertain terms, that there is a prince in Allura’s future and not a lowly pilot like me.”

“Listen, I hope you were serious in the first part of your letter. If love is looking you in the face, God damnit Jeff, grab on to it and don’t let go. Don’t be a loner like me…”

Keith
“Hey, I’ll trade you one Red Lion pilot for any one of yours… Interested?”

Hi Keith,

Now then, FINALLY I have a great chance to tell you a couple of things...
When IN THE HELL are you going to profess your damn, everlasting love to my
cousin Allura for Goodness' sake???

“Oh here we go again!”

The poor girl is really worn out, and then IT'S ME who has to swallow HOURS
and HOURS of interplanetary phone-calls with her constant complaints...Stuff
like "Do I look like Haggar? Romelle, tell me SINCERELY, do I vaguely look
like Haggar, since he seems afraid even to give me a kiss on the
cheek?! Maybe with a face lifting, or a sexy night-gown..."or" do you think
I'm going to die virgin??"...and other atrocities...
Now, what am I supposed to tell her??? I can't stand it...
And the worst is that EVEN Coran got mad at me, because the last phone bill
of the Castle was ENORMOUS, and he phoned me screaming that we are drying
the royal finances, and I should be doing something to solve this situation
because Allura plays the deaf...
Now, it's up to you, dear Captain, I made my speech, don't let me say it
twice!!!!

Yours NOT truly,
ROMELLE, ROYAL PRINCESS OF POLLUX

[email protected]

Romelle,

“I find it hard to believe that Allura, the most beautiful woman on Arus, thinks she looks like Haggar, give me a break! Nor can I believe she would don a sexy nightgown. I mean, whenever Nanny finds that kind of stuff she goes ballistic. And there is no way Allura thinks she is going to die a… a… oh don’t make me say it. Did Sven put you up to this?”

“Are you sure this ‘He’ she is referring to isn’t that prince that was here last week when I was gone on surveillance. Nanny was sure to fill me in personally when I got back. She told me all about how Allura really liked him and was hanging on his every word, and how she is going to be inviting him back for another visit. I think she said he was coming when I will be at that conference with Sven next week. I think you’ve got your hes confused Romelle. You have too… Nanny said… I mean, the prince…Allura is… Romelle? Please tell me you have your Hes confused.”

Keith
“I’ll talk to Coran about the bills for you he was out of line.”

Keith,

I bet Pidge told you about Aiden, Ototo, Daneil, and I. I bet you also know the crisis on Arus. If not, read his page about it. My force is sending reinforcements. And kick Lotor for me, okay?
Char

Hello Char,

Yes he did and thanks for the alert. Yusuke, Hiei, Kurama and the gang said that you and they are handling it just fine and I wouldn’t want to get in the way. This crisis sounds to be more their specialty. Now if your talking Robeasts, that’s ours! Do pass the word when you see them that they are welcome to stay at the castle if they like. Hiei could show me some more of his sword moves that I can use on Lotor and Yusuke and Lance could catch up on their insults.

Consider Lotor kicked!
Keith

Hey, hey, Keith!

I'm here to help you! Being the only certifiable genius on the team, not to mention that I've finally reached the official status of, 'adulthood' as of my recent 19th birthday, I feel I'm more than qualified to come in and lend you a hand sorting through all this, 'Princess-stuff'.

People are objecting to your handling of the situation between you and Allura, because frankly...they just don't understand the situation and the timing at hand. Timing, as you always say...is everything. And to move forward in a relationship, when the time is not right... could be disastrous...to say the very least.

You see, Romelle is obviously bias. I mean, that's her cousin, right? Think of it... if that were your cousin, you'd really have to stretch to resist the urge to jump in and defend your family.

Jeff... well, Jeff is a great leader.. but a crappy lover! Let's face it... he liked Ginger...gave up on her... now he's telling her blonde jokes...real mature, might I add....now, he runs in Lisa's corner...and now doesn't know what to do with a girl that can actually THINK for herself. (Ginger...if you read this.. I'm sorry, but I call em' as I see em'.)

Lance... well...he's just a big, fat, blabber mouth and braggart to boot!

Nothing more needs to be said there...but I'll say it anyway, because I need to entertain myself. You see, I'm doing this email on watch in the Control Room...but NOT TO WORRY, KEITH!!! Everything's under control here! Sensors are clear! Nothing's happening....oh wait... what's that heading for the planet? MY GOD!!! Is it... could it be!!! NOT LOTOR'S DOOM FLEET?? HOW'D I MISS THAT???? Where's that stupid alarm button!!!! I've got to call the force and... oh... crap...... uh... wait a minute... opps...

Oh...never mind. It was a meteorite. Burned up in the atmosphere. All's clear.

Now...where was I?

OH! YEAH!!! Lance....

He thinks he's a lady's man...but truth is, he was working on a little dish over in the village of Porter last week, and let me tell you...Hunk and I have been laughing at this for a week! He told us all about his plans to romance this girl...and...well, you know where Lance was heading to with her.

Well... the girl dumped him, flat!!! Not only that... she threw his flowers back into his face!!! Then, he goes to take her in his arms to kiss her... and she stomps on his foot!!! HILARIOUS!!!! BWAHAHAHAAAHHAA!!!

He had to visit Dr. Gorma on the sly for a broken big toe!! I was CRYING when one of the nurse sources that I have, told me about it!!!!! And Hunk... he needed oxygen after hearing the news....

(wipes tears from eyes and puts glasses back on face)

Bottom line...don't listen to Lance...no matter what. He's full of hot air...nothing more. He's obviously the LAST guy to listen to, when it comes to matters of love! Lust.. hmm... maybe he's a good source.

But love...never.

Well, I hope this bit of encourage came as a welcome breath of fresh air for you, Commander. After all.. brown-nosing is MY specialty!!! ^_^

By the way...

If you don't mind my asking...

When ARE you planning on asking the Princess out on a date anytime soon? If so, can you be as specific as possible, WHEN you plan on doing that, please? I'm in the Castle pool and I could stand to win MOOCHO buckeronies if I get the date right! Not to mention...beating out Lance and Hunk!!!

If you want to split the winnings, Keith, just work with me here! I've got a hefty bet in on the third Saturday in November, this year. So that gives you... let's see... that's, April...May...June... Eight months! Better get planning!

Well, got to get back to work now.
See ya! ~_^
and remember... work with me and I'll take care of us both!!!

Pidge

Pidge,

Pidge, Pidge, Pidge, Pidge…
How many times do I have to remind you that when you are on watch, you are on watch? And there you are goofing off again. We are under constant threat from Doom. They are always trying something new to get past our sensors. We must remain ever vigilant especially when on watch. We are a team, Pidge. And a team is only as strong as its weakest member. Remember that. There is a time for work and a time for play. AND SITTING IN CONTROL IS NOT IT! Do you understand me!?

Until you can fully show me your full dedication to you job when on duty I hereby suspend all of your extra privileges immediately. Including, but not inclusive of, your online activities. Do you hear me, Pidge? You will now be taking extra shifts in control every day until I say otherwise. I want all the sensors optimized. I want the new motion sensors fully tested. I want the new long-range com system fully operational in two days. And wipe those streaks of the main screen! For that matter the whole room gets the white glove! I will be up there in three hours I expect to see you there, Pidge, and working diligently. You don’t want me to get angry now do you, Pidge?

As to your… opinions… Yes timing is everything and when the time is not right it could be disastrous. To bad you didn’t time your e-mail better, Pidge.

As for your comments on the Vehicle Force… I don’t know what gossip you and Chip have been sharing, please keep it to yourselves. Jeff’s love life or lack of it is for him to discuss not you.

Now, Lance. I believe you called him a big, fat, blabber mouth, braggart? Not very nice there Pidge. Hmmm, now about this toe in question. Didn’t Hunk tell me he broke Lance’s toe when they were sparing? Yes, and you said you saw the whole thing… “really I was there”…well, well, well. You know that reminds me… Allura told me this morning that the orphanage down the hill’s septic tank just broke and they need it dug out and repaired. Looks like I just got three volunteers. Thank You Pidge!

Since it seems I am again the butt of your jokes with this pool of yours. I would like to start a new one. How long will it take before Pidge gets thrown into the septic tank by Hunk and Lance for squealing. I’ll take ten minutes!

Keith
In case you forgot, your commanding officer.

Pidge's response...

Keith,

FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!! It was a joke! (all except the Castle pool, that is) but come on! I'm the most dedicated person on the team! Do I REALLY deserve this kind of punishment???? And as far as protecting Lance and his big toe incident, Lance threatened to beat the living daylights out of me, if I didn't go along with it! But Hunk made him pay through the nose.

Haven't you noticed how 'productive' Lance has been around the Castle of Lions, lately? Cleaning up, helping out in the in-house orphanage center, community charitable contributions, especially when it comes to kids? Do you think he's doing that out of the kindness of his heart???? LANCE???

Pleeeeezzeee.....

Be nice, Keith! I pull my weight around here!! After all, who is it that runs all the system diagnostics? ME!

Who's the guy that invents new gadgets that benefit all of us??? ME again!

And who is it that takes care to keep the mice out of the electronics? Me...naturally!

I do lots around here, as it is!! And I do it, without having to be told! And what thanks do I get? My Commanding officer jumps on my back, just because I make a crack or two in the name of fun!! Sheesh, Keith!!

But... I apologize for my crass behavior and for my cracks about the Castle Pool. Sorry, Keith.

Am I off the hook now????

Pidge

Pidge,

“Apology Accepted.”

“However your punishment continues. Yes I know all you do for the team, Pidge. But you are mistaken if you feel your job if more important than the rest of us. Everyone must pull their weight and contribute where their skills are strongest. And, I cannot stress enough… when in control you are in control and nothing else. I can look the other way, and do, when you guys goof off at other times, but I cannot when it comes to your shift in control or when you’re piloting the Lions. We are Galaxy Garrison officers and this planet is counting on us, remember that Pidge.”

“Ah, so that’s why Lance took Hunks shift this morning. Heh. But, isn’t he really helping out with the kids to impress that red haired teacher? You know the one. He’s been following her around like a love struck puppy for weeks. (and yes Lance, I know your reading this.)”

“So, Pidge…do you mind telling me who started this pool and who is in it. I really would like to know who’s behind this. More curiosity than anything else. Do people really think that about Allura and I…? That we would… um…actually date…?”

Keith

Keit,

I tought I'd take a few minutes of my time here on Pollux to email you and to tell you dat you've got a wonderful forum going here! I'm glad dat you decided to do dis!

In scanning your mail so far, I've found dat Princess Romelle had dropped you a word or two... a harsh word or two!

I jist wanted to say how sorry I am dat Romelle got a bit out of hand dere in her email to you.

She's been edgy lately and fighting constantly with Bandor. You know how brot'ers and sisters can fight.

I tough dat since I was here, I would pass on some of my advise to you. But, I intend to me more understanding den Romelle was.

Anyvay, let me give you a piece of advise dat will stick wit you for a long time to come.

WAKE UP!

How often is a beautiful princess going to come into your life? My God't, Keit! Vhat's da matter wit you? I know you feel as if she and you do not belong togeter. I tought da same ting before too. But its not true! Get wit da program! Start dating, will you? People are going to start tinking you're gay or someting, and jist afraid to come out about it!!!

(You're not...are you? I mean... we've been parted for a while...and wit me on Pollux and you on Arus.. tings happen dat I might miss...)

Never mind.
Jist remember...if you need some advise on how to handle spunky, spilt-fire blonde hair princesses, let me know! I'm here for you, my friend!

You see... dat is how to give proper advise! Being firm, but say it wit love, is always a good mixture. Now...don't you feel better, Keit?

Glad I could help, old friend!

Signing off from Pollux,
Sven

Sven,

“For a moment there I was glad to here form you, but no you just like all the rest. Sven, you of all people should understand my situation. Pollux isn’t that different than Arus. What if Romelle was next in line for the crown? Do you really think they would be as receptive to you then? Be honest Sven, they’d run you off that planet. And then there is that whole dating someone under my command issue, or have you forgotten about that little bit of red tape. You are not Romelle’s commanding officer last I checked. So, I bet you’re in the castle pool too huh, what do you have? April? May?”

“And for the record I never said Allura and I don’t belong together. I said we couldn’t be together. And well, if that makes people think I’m gay then so be it.”

“Keith?”

“Uh, Allura how did … ? When did…?”

“You think we belong together?”

“I… uh… Allu… mmmm… Princess I was just explaining to Sven about Garrison conduct regulation 32…”

“Keith?”

“Prin….cesssssss… ?

“Keith…answer the question.”

“I…Princess I… Oh is that the time? Sorry Princess I’ve got to go check on Pidge…I… uh, bye.” (Swish.)

“KEITH!”

Sevn's response...

Keit,

I was totally genuine in my comments to you! And I do understand your situation! But I don't tink you understand it, my friend.

No, Romelle is not under my command. But...if you will remember...I am now under hers. As captain and high ranking officer of da Polluxian Guard Forces, I am responsible for da security of not only da Castle and da people of Pollux, but for da safety of da Royal Family...and my orders come from Princess Romelle, directly!

But...jist what makes you tink dat Arus would not welcome you as an adopted son and suitor of da Princess? For Godt's sake, Keit...you are DA BLACK LION KNIGHT! Da Commander of Voltron! You're famous! Arus loves you...especially da girls! (see a previous email you had received!)

You are in love wit her, Keit. You know dat you are. She makes your knees turn to jelly whenever she's around!

You're jist not willing to admit it to yourself yet. So, hide behind da Garrison rulebook for as long as you can. But someday... you might jist find dat its too late to act...and Allura has moved on. (Romelle suggested for me to say dat last part. What a great line, huh?)

Now.. what castle pool are we taking about? Is it too late to get in on it? Who do I talk to? How much money can I win if I get it right???

Sincerely,
Sven

Sven,

“How can you compare our situations they’re completely different? And anyway, Bandor is to be the King of Pollux and he has already given you his blessing. Yes, you are under Romelle’s command, her being the Princess and all but Bandor is truly your superior not her.”

“AND I’M NOT HIDING! Rules are rules. What my legs do in her presence notwithstanding. I mean…uh…”
Thunk… Thunk… Thunk…SLAM!
“Damnit Sven, I don’t…I…aghhhh! Please? Please stop. Sven, I… I…don’t want to think about it. Ally is…Allura is………unggghhhhh… Sven, please don’t do this to me. I can’t have her you know I can’t.” “I… aghhhhhhh!”
“Goodnight!”

Hey Keith....

Question....
And no...it’s not about women. It’s about something FAR more important!

Can we talk to Nanny about kitchen hours? I mean...I work all day, starting at 6am, sharp, for Lion Practice...and depending on the circumstance...I end up missing a meal here or there. Then, I have to find time to wander across the meadow, down the hill and over the river to one of the village eateries for a bite to eat because Nanny won't let anyone in the kitchen on off meal hours! That's crazy...especially when we're talking about being on alert all the time!

Can you talk to Nanny, PLEASE??? Something's gotta give, here!!! You don't want to see me have to get MAD....do you?

Also, can you consider scheduling Lion Practice after 9am in the morning? Especially since I have the evening flight patrol that doesn't get done until 11pm at night, by the time I wind down, I'm looking at a 1am bedtime! To get up again at 5:30am for 6am practice is hard for me! I'm not a morning guy, Keith! And then, missing a meal and having to go on a hunt for food does NOT make Hunk a happy camper!

Maybe you can assign me the early afternoon flight patrol, instead, and then, I can have the evenings free. That would at least make the kitchen problem more tolerable...kinda. I'll just have to learn to graze in the fields with the cows. (some of these little Mom & Pop eateries cost a fortune!!)

See what you can do, Keith. Thanks for your 'open-door' policy. I know you'll come through for me.
Hunk

Add on:
"Hey Keith... I busted into Hunk's email and read what he sent you. But, what Hunk's NOT telling you, is that from 11pm to 1 or sometimes 1:30am... he's playing vid-disc games! He's addicted to that stuff! He can't peel himself away from it! So don't let him fool you, Keith! Besides... the early afternoon shift is MY shift! And I ain't giving it up from anyone...especially Hunk! I've got seniority!"

Lance
[email protected]

PS: Don't even bother asking me HOW I hacked his computer! But if you must know...Pidge taught me how to do it!! So, don't leave anything personal for me to read! You know... about you and Allura, maybe??? Those things have a habit of getting out, ya know!!!
Bwahahahaha!!!

Hunk,

“Have you forgotten why Nanny instigated that policy? I distinctly remember the kitchen being available to us all at all hours of the day until a certain Yellow Lion pilot, who shall remain nameless, ate all of Nanny’s special dessert she maid especially for Allura’s birthday that she had spent hours preparing.”

“You’re barking up the wrong tree if you expect sympathy over your hours, Hunk. I get less sleep that all of you. And, I am well aware of your activities after lunch, of should I say lack there of. Yes Hunk, I know what you really doing down in the maintenance bay all afternoon. Zzzzzzzzzzzz. And I haven’t said a word.”

“I would suggest you go to the source of your troubles and offer your help to Nanny. Helping prepare the meals cleaning up etc. If she can trust you in the kitchen again maybe, just maybe she will drop her blockade. Trust me Hunk, were all suffering from Nanny’s rules. Thank you oh so much.

“And, Lance, who I know is also reading this.”

“Do you think I have forgotten about you previous e-espionage. I know full well you read everything I send and receive. And I still haven’t forgiven you for that little love note you sent to Allura on my behalf, Luckily she recognized it for the fake it was. So don’t even start on trying to take the spotlight off your little prank and putting it on Hunk and Pidge. Oh, and Lance how is your toe doing? Heh!”

Keith

Keith,

If you believed Galaxy Garrison and the Alliance intended to use the Princess' unmarried status to declare her rulership invalid, and supplant it with their own administration (for the purpose of, say, forcing a swarm of refugees Arus isn't able to really handle upon the planet), what would you do?

(a) Would you marry the princess to legitimize her government, and thereby force the Alliance to negotiate instead of dictate?

(b) Betray the Alliance for Arus, leading the Princess' forces in rebellion to the oppressive Alliance government?

Or (c) Just Follow Orders, and betray the Princess and Arus to the Alliance?
-------------------------
David A. Tatum
http://davecon.anifics.com

Hello Dave,

Aaaaaahh, an ethics question. Nice change.
So, if, and a really big IF mind you, Galaxy Garrison and the Alliance used Allura’s unmarried status to take over what would I do?

Well, yes I suppose that is a vague possibility after all, Arusan law states that Allura cannot be crowed queen until she names a prince consort, so your argument holds some merit.

Well, there is no way I would betray the Princess and Plant Arus like that. I swore an oath when I arrived here and have no intention of reneging on it. So, that would then make me be betraying the Alliance. Now I would put to you that if the Alliance were to attempt such a coup, I feel they would no longer be worthy of my alliance. That is not the organization I promised to serve.
So, (C) No, I would not just follow orders.

Now (B) Betray the Alliance for Arus. Hmmm. Well I suppose I would, if it truly came to that. The Alliance is very opposed to invading a planet against their will, that’s the Drule or Doom way, not the Alliance way. That is why the Alliance was formed in the first place, to stop such aggression. If the Alliance were to suddenly change, well, I’m sorry but I could not blindly support that.

Now (A) Would you marry the princess to legitimize her government, and thereby force the Alliance to negotiate instead of dictate? Figured better keep this one till the end. If…and another really big, and theoretical, IF…IF I was to marry the princess. Firstly, with me not being of noble heritage it would have to be researched to see if Allura could even be crowned Queen if she married a commoner. Arusan law is very convoluted in this matter as I have found in my readings. So, IF somehow I could marry her and IF she could still be crowned queen, then yes as ruler I would endeavor to negotiate a solution.

Great question, thanks
Keith

Keith...

How in the WORLD do you manage handling all of these personal questions being thrown your way? I'm getting overwhelmed... and its only been one day!!!
Why do so many people care whether you and I...uh...I mean... whether two people... no wait...that's not right either...

**sigh**

Oh... look at me! I'm asking you a personal question!!!!!
(bows head in shame)

Your distraught Princess...
Allura.

Princess,

Heheheh… Welcome to the galaxy wide web!
For your information I CAN’T handle all the questions about…well us… Thanks so much for making me do this, Princess. I’ve been trying to keep an open mind about it…uh about…peoples opinions. I mean… not about us…that is not that I’m not open minded about…oh hell.

Lets start again… I realize some people romanticize about princesses and the like. Isn’t that how the fairy tail always goes, the princess and her knight, Prince Charming. Well I’m no prince. The people that e-mail somehow don’t understand that. They see us together all the time and well they assume that there is more than there is between us. Uh, well hmmm… Isn’t it weird how no one has e-mailed about how we shouldn’t be… well… involved. I mean, from what Nanny has said about what the people really say about us in private… about how it’s a disgrace that you spend so much time with me… and the team! I would think they would have by now. The silent masses I suppose.

Ally, if you want to ask me a personal question, could we please do it in a less public form? Maybe over a workout or snack or something?

Keith
Not happy but still your…umm… ughhh…

 

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