EXPLORING THE MYTHS VIOLENCE
AGAINST WOMEN IN RELATIONSHIPS
MYTH:
Women often provoke violence and deserve what they get.
FACT: No woman ever deserves to be beaten. Assaulted Women report a wide range
of incidents that trigger violence. For example: 'I friend his eggs the wrong way' 'I
didn’t turn down the radio enough' or 'I went out with friends without asking
permission'.
MYTH:
Spousal assault is a new social problem.
FACT: Wife assault is not new. What is new is that we are now speaking out
against it. Spousal violence has been condoned throughout history. For example, the widely
used term ‘rule of thumb’ comes from a 1767 English common law that permitted a
husband to ‘chastise his wife with a whip or rattan no wider than his thumb'.(1)
In Canada, it wasn’t until 1968 when the federal Divorce Act
was passed,
that physical and mental cruelty
became grounds for divorce.
MYTH: Wife assault is not a widespread problem.
FACT: Studies indicate one in five Canadian men living with a woman admitted to
using violence against her. (1)
MYTH:
Wife assault occurs more often among certain groups of people.
FACT: Wife assault occurs in all ethnic, racial, economic, social and age
groups. However, violence in more affluent groups is often hidden because these women use
shelters, legal clinics and other social services less often.(1)
MYTH:
Assaulted women could leave their abusive partners if they wanted to.
FACT: A women may stay in an abusive relationship for many reasons. For
example:
* She hopes the relationship will get better.
* She doesn’t want to break up a family.
* Her partner’s abuse isolates her from friends and family.
* She fears for her safety and that of her children.
* She depends on her partner’s income.
* She has lost self-esteem because of her partner’s abuse.
* She has no where else to go
* Her partner has threatened to harm her if she leaves.
* She is worried about her or her partner’s immigration status.
NOTE: Based on overburdened shelters, hostels and a decrease in welfare
payments, it is reported more women are remaining in violent relationships.
MYTH:
Men who abuse their partners are mentally ill.
FACT: Most men who assault their partners are not violent outside the home.
They don’t hit their bosses or colleagues. When abusive men hit their partners, they
often aim the blows at parts of the body where bruises don’t show. If abusive men
were truly mentally ill, they could not limited their violence in this way. (1)
MYTH:
Alcohol causes men to assault their partners.
FACT: Alcohol can make it easier for a man to be violent. But the real cause of
wife assaults is the batterer’s desire for power and control over his partner.
Batterer's often use alcohol as an excuse to avoid taking responsibility for their violent
behaviour.
MYTH:
Men are abused by their partners as often as women are.
FACT: More that 92% of charges related to spousal assault in Ontario are laid
against men. (2)
(1) Dispelling the Myths - Ontario
Women’s Directorate
(2) Solicitor General and Corrections Services of Ontario
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