February 18, 2001 – Daytona 500

The day was hectic from the start. Junior was up and out of the coach before eight that morning. Noelle stayed in bed, not wanting to get out from underneath the warmth of the blankets. Finally she did, knowing that Junior was going to be looking for her eventually. This race was a big one and he wanted her to be cheering him on in the pits.

After her shower, she hummed a melody to herself as she placed the test down on the counter and proceeded to get dressed. Three minutes was going to take forever. She heard the door of the coach slam shut, just as she looked at the results.

“Junior! We really need to have a talk about this.” She walked out with the test in her hand, only to find Dale Sr. waiting for her. “Oh…hi.” Noelle hid her hand behind her back, but it was too late. Dale Sr. simply held out his hand for her to give him what she was hiding. “You really don’t want to see that, do you?”

“C’mon, Noelle…hand it over.” Dale Sr. said calmly. Noelle took a deep breath and handed it over. She watched as his expression changed on his face and his eyes grew wide. “Is this really what I think it is?”

“You’re going to be a grandpa again.” She said as he grabbed her and hugged her tightly. “Wait a second, you’re not mad?”

“Hell no! I knew you and Junior would be having a baby soon. I could just see it on both of your faces! Does he know yet?”

“No…should we go tell him?” Noelle looked at the test and saw a very clear positive reading.

“No. Tell him after the race. We want to make sure his mind stays clear.” Dale Sr. hugged her again. “I can’t wait to get that boy out on the track!” Noelle laughed and set the test down on the counter before following him outside.

Noelle stood on the pit wall and watched the cars race past her. Junior was holding his own and even passed Dale Sr. He slid into second place behind fellow DEI driver, Michael Waltrip. Her heart raced as she kept her eyes on Junior’s car.

“C’mon baby, pass him.” She said under her breath as white flag dropped signaling one more lap. Out of no where, Dale Sr. spun out and hit the wall. Noelle gasped and covered her mouth, her attention no longer on Junior. “Oh my God.” She jumped off the wall and ran to Tony Jr. who held her back. “What happened to him?”

“He ran into Sterling Marlin I think.” Tony Jr. said. “We’ll watch it on replay later.” Noelle nodded and waited for Junior who had come in second.

Junior met everyone in the pit and waited for the ambulance to make it back to the infield care center. He took Noelle’s hand and squeezed it as they started walking to meet Dale Sr. and tell him about the DEI win.

“Junior, we need you to come with us.” One of the Nascar officials stopped them before they could go any further.

“I’ll catch you guys after I talk to my dad.” Junior brushed past the official, only to have him yank Junior’s shoulder back. “Hey!”

“No, we need you to come with us now. We’ll take you and your wife to the hospital.” The official had an eerie tone to his voice that sent chills down Noelle’s spine. Junior gripped her hand tighter as they were led through the crowd to an awaiting car.

At the hospital, Noelle sat in the waiting room, flipping through magazines, not really knowing what the articles were about. When that got to her, she paced back and forth. The nurses wouldn’t give her any information, even though she was family, so the waiting was driving her insane.

After what seemed like eternity, Junior walked out from behind the doors and grabbed her. He held her to him and started sobbing. Noelle knew, without him saying a word, that Dale Sr. was gone. Her mind raced. She couldn’t control anything. Her emotions let go as her own tears streamed down her face and her body shook.

“He didn’t make it.” Junior finally said, his voice trembling. “Head injuries.” He clung to Noelle like a baby would cling to a security blanket. She held him as tight as she could. “I can’t stay here any longer.”

“Let’s go home.” She whispered as he pulled away from her. He nodded and wiped the tears from her face. “Where’s Teresa?”

“Still with the doctors.” Junior glanced at the doors. “I can’t go back in there.”  Noelle nodded and walked to the admitting desk. She asked if a message could be relayed to Teresa that they were going home. The nurse nodded and hurried away from the desk to deliver the message. “Let’s go.”

The ride home on the plane was quiet. Noelle slept with her head against Junior’s shoulder while Junior stared out the window. Jade sat across from them, watching Junior to make sure he was ok.

“Let me know if you need anything. Anything at all.” Jade hugged them both after they had gotten off the plane back home. “I’ll call you tomorrow.” Noelle nodded and looked at Junior who was standing with no emotion on his face. “Make sure he’s ok.”

“I will, don’t worry.” Noelle hugged Jade and thanked him for everything. She turned back to Junior. “C’mon honey, let’s go home.” Junior nodded and followed her to his truck that was parked in the parking lot.

At home, Junior took Noelle upstairs and made sure she went back to sleep. He sat and watched her sleep, her breathing ragged, followed but a sigh every now and then. He had stood outside the bathroom door while she took a shower and listened to her crying. He couldn’t bring himself to cry again. It was inside him and it would eventually come out, but that very minute, he felt nothing. He was numb.

Junior wandered the house, making sure the doors and windows were locked. He fed the cats and then wandered upstairs, once again checking on Noelle who had switched positions and was now hugging his pillow to her. He went into his computer room and sat down. He checked his email and then stared at the screen. A single tear slid down his cheek and he brushed it away. His life had come crashing down before him and he didn’t know if he was going to be able to come back up. The man he loved more than life itself, his best friend, his father was gone and no one could bring him back.

*******

The ringing of the phone woke Noelle up from a deep sleep. She reached for the cordless and answered only to hear the buzz of a dial tone. She sighed and sat up in bed. Junior wasn’t next to her.

“Junior?” She called out, but received no answer. She got out of bed and checked the bathroom and then went across the hall to find Junior asleep with his head on his desk, the computer screen saver, casting a blue light over him. Noelle watched him for a moment then went to wake him. “Honey, come to bed.”

“Huh?” He jumped when she touched him. Noelle stepped back, letting him realize where he was.

“Come on, it’s almost four in the morning. Let’s go back to bed.” She led him from the computer room and back across the hall where he undressed and climbed into bed. Noelle joined him and he immediately moved her into the spooning position and held her tightly.

“Don’t leave me.” He whispered in her ear. “Please.” She kissed his arm. “I love you.”

“I love you too.” She said. “I’d never leave you. Not in a million years.” Junior moved his hands down to her stomach and let them rest there. For a minute, she wondered if he knew. It wasn’t possible. She hadn’t told him and the only person that knew other than her had been Dale Sr.

Junior tossed and turned all night, keeping Noelle awake. If she moved an inch, he’d wake up and wrap his arms around her again. His hands always going to her stomach. He was driving her crazy, but she didn’t want to wake him up and ask him.

Finally around nine the next morning, Junior was awake and laying in bed watching her. She opened her eyes and said nothing. They looked at each other for a good while before he finally told her what she needed to hear.

“He had told me before the race.” Junior’s voice cracked as he tried not to cry.

“I wanted to tell you.” She said quietly. “But I’m glad he did.”

“He was excited.” Junior closed his eyes and rolled on his back. “Talking about taking him out on the track as soon as he could crawl.” Noelle smiled and continued to listen. “He told me he loved me and he was proud of me. That I was going to be a good daddy.”

“You are going to be.”

“Just like him.” Junior looked at her again. “He said I was going to be just like him.” Noelle watched as the tears welled up in his eyes and finally broke. “He’s never going to see our baby. Never hold him. Never see him win his first race.” Noelle laid her head on Junior’s chest. “Why the hell did he have to die?” He hugged Noelle to him and they both laid there crying. Neither one of them knowing the answer to the question that needed answered the most.

*******

Junior stayed secluded in his computer room for the majority of the day. Noelle went to Teresa’s to help her and Kelley with the arrangements for the funeral. She’d call home to check on Junior, only to get the answering machine.

“He’s not picking up.” Noelle set the phone back on the cradle and leaned her head against the wall. Teresa came up to her and hugged her. Noelle hugged her back, knowing that the entire family needed as much support as they could give.

“We need to talk.” She said quietly and led Noelle into Dale Sr.’s office. Noelle sat down on the couch next to Teresa and sighed. “Dale told me that you’re pregnant.” Noelle saw a slight smile show on her face. “He didn’t want me to tell you that I knew until Junior was told.”

“He told Junior before the race.” Noelle felt the tears in her eyes again and tried to stop them from falling. She looked away from Teresa. “Junior told me this morning.”

“He loved you, Noelle. Just like you were his own daughter. He had even made a comment to me the day he introduced you to Junior that you were going to be the one Junior married.” Teresa laughed a little. “Every time you two would fight and break up, I’d think it was over for good. But Dale would tell me, no…they’re just having a tiff, they’ll be back together in no time. He was always right. He knew there was something special between the two of you. He even compared you and Junior to a young us.” Noelle glanced at Teresa and she nodded. “He told me on your wedding day as we sat and watched you two, he leaned over and said, ‘They remind me of us when we were younger.’ And I had to agree with him.” Noelle smiled at her.

“I thought he was going to go off when he found out I was pregnant. I thought it was Junior who had come in the coach and I said something about needing to have a talk.” Noelle thought back to that day. “I walked out and Dale was standing there. He made me hand over what I was hiding. I thought all hell was going to break loose. Instead he hugged me.” Teresa nodded. “He told Junior that he was proud of him and that he was going to make a good daddy. He was going to be just like Dale Sr.” Teresa started sniffling and Noelle got up to retrieve a box of Kleenex from the desk. “This is going to be hard on Junior.”

“It’s going to be hard on everyone. But at least Dale knew he was going to be a grandpa again.” Teresa sighed as she wiped her eyes. “I just wanted to let you know that he told me. No one else knows and we should probably keep it that way for a little while.” Noelle nodded in agreement. “Why don’t you go home and take care of Junior, I’m going to lie down for a while since Kelley is still here.”

“Ok, let me know if you need anything and I’ll come back out. Or I’ll make Junior come out.”

“Let Junior be alone. He has a lot going on in his head. Just make sure he’s ok, but I wouldn’t pressure him to talk. He does have his father’s temper at times.” Teresa warned. She gave Noelle a hug. “I’ll call if I need anything.”

********

Noelle walked into the dark house. She flipped on the lights in the living room and noticed that nothing had changed since she left earlier that afternoon. She hung her coat on the back of a chair and went into the kitchen, wondering if she should make dinner or not. Upstairs, she could hear music from Junior’s computer room and the clicking of the keys on the keyboard.

“Honey, I’m home.” She yelled. The response was not one she expected. The music got louder and the door was slammed shut. Biting her lip, she leaned against the island in the kitchen and covered her face with her hands. When they needed each other the most, he was going to shut himself off from her. The phone rang, making her jump.

“Hello?” She asked picking it up.

“Noelle, its mom. Are you ok?” Her mother asked. Hearing her mother’s voice made the tears fall again and Noelle sobbed into the phone. “Noelle…honey talk to me. What happened? Is it true what the news is saying?”

“Yes.” Noelle sunk down to the floor. “He died on impact I think. I don’t know much more. Junior probably knows more, but he’s not talking.”

“Oh my God, I’m so sorry. Do you need me to come down there?”

“No, we’re ok. I’ll let you know more about the funeral as soon as Teresa has more information. I believe it’s going to be on Thursday though.”

“Will you call me if you or Junior need anything?” she asked.

“Yes mom, you know I will.”

“How’s Hollie?”

“I don’t know, I haven’t talked to her since yesterday morning. She may have called, but I was with Teresa today.” Noelle sighed. “I doubt that Junior answered the phone at all. He usually only answers the cell phone.” Noelle took a deep breath. “I have something to tell you.”

“What?”

“I’m pregnant.” She listened as her mother dropped the phone and then scrambled to pick it up. “Mom, you there?”

“When did you find out? How far along are you?”

“Yesterday and I don’t know. I’ll go to the doctor’s next week if I can find one down here. If not I’ll come back to Charlotte.” Noelle heard footsteps. “Hey, I think Junior’s coming downstairs. I’ll call you later.”

“Ok sweetie. Give our love and prayers to the entire family. And take care of yourself and that baby.”

“I will mom. Love you.” Noelle hung up the phone and listened before she stood up. The footsteps she had heard had just been Junior walking across the floor upstairs. She sighed and set the phone down and decided to take her chances by going up to see how he was doing.

She ran up the stairs and stopped before she got to the top. The door to his computer room was open a little and he was leaning back in his chair, his hands over his face. She walked quietly to the door and opened it a little more.

“Hey.” She said softly. He turned around in the chair and looked at her.

“Hey.” He motioned for her to come to him. Noelle walked toward him and he pulled her down on his lap and wrapped his arms around her. “How’s Teresa and Taylor Nichole?”

“Doing as good as can be expected. Taylor wasn’t home. I think she was at Kerry’s still. But Kelley was there helping with the arrangements.”

“I’m racing Sunday.”

“What?”

“I’m racing Sunday. The cars good, we can win.”

“Junior, you don’t have to. I’m sure Teresa will understand.” Noelle looked at him and shook her head.

“I just said I’m racing. We’re going to Rockingham Thursday night.” Junior said as Noelle got off his lap. “He’d want me to race.”  Noelle sat on the desk and looked at him shaking her head.

“I think it’s too early.”

“You think too much.” Junior turned the chair around so that he couldn’t see her.

“Whatever, Junior. I just think it’s too early for you to go back out. It’s been a day. One day! We have the whole week to get through still.”

“I have the rest of my life to get through without him.” Junior turned around slowly in the chair and glared at her. “My entire life stopped yesterday. I have to figure out how to put the pieces back together and this is the only way I know how. You’re not my fucking mother, so quit telling me what I should and shouldn’t do.”

“No, but I am your wife and I’m concerned about your well-being!” She said firmly. “You seem to forget that one thing. I’m not telling you what to do, I’m just saying you need to think things through.”

“I already did and I already called Tony Sr. He agrees with me. We’re racing and that’s that.” Junior got up and left the room, leaving Noelle staring after him.

*******

The next few days went by in a blur. The funeral was held in a private service in Mooresville. Only family, employees and close friends were invited. Noelle’s parents came to town for the service and left the same day.

“Are you sure he’s ok?” Her mom asked after the burial. Noelle looked over at her husband who was talking with Tony and a few of the DEI employees. “He doesn’t look good.”

“He hasn’t slept in about two days. He just stays in the computer room. I tried to get him to sleep, but we just argue and get pissed at each other.”  Noelle sighed. “I can’t talk to him. Teresa tried as well, but he shrugged her off. The only one he talks to is Tony right now.” Noelle’s mom hugged her. “I don’t know what to do.”

“Be patient. He’s healing in his own way. You just stand beside him. He lost his father. It’s a loss that you can’t even begin to imagine. He’ll come around. Just let him go back to doing what he loves.”

That night, Junior and Noelle left for Rockingham. The drive was a quiet one. Neither of them had spoken to one another since before the funeral that morning. Noelle looked out the window and let the tears silently fall from her eyes. She tried her best to conceal the fact that she was crying. Out of no where, Junior reached over and brushed a tear from her face.

“I love you.” He said. His hand reached for hers and entwined their fingers together. Somehow that made her feel better. Just that little gesture to let her know that the last week when they fought wasn’t because they were mad at each other. They were exhausted, saddened and stressed.

Chapters: 1/2/3/4/5/6/7/8/9/10/11/12/13/14/15/16/17/18/19/20/21/22/23/24/25/26/27/28/29/30