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The Simpsons Archive

Des's Simpsons Road Rage

Pick's Tribute To The Simpsons

The Definitive Frink!

... Hidilly ho, neighboureenos ... Welcome to Flancrest Enterprises ... we sell religious book rugs over the Internet-- Uh I mean its your #1 source for The Simpsons ... Bless the grocer for this wonderful meat, the middleman who jacked up the price, and let's not forget the human but determined boys at the slaughterhouse ... Howdily-doodily Stranger ... At times like these I used to turn to the Bible and find solace but even the Good Book can't help me now ... I sold it to you for seven cents ... Well guess! Book of Revelations, fire breathing lion's head, tail made out of snakes who else is it gonna be ...

Name: Homer Jay Simpson

Age: 36

Weight: Between 239 and 260 lbs.

Occupation: Safety Inspector, Sector 7G Springfield Nuclear Power Plant

Favorite Foods: Donuts, Krusty Burgers, pork chops, bulk seafood, honey roasted peanuts, Pork Rinds Light and Chippos.

Favorite Beverage: Duff

Beverage he dislikes: Mountain Dew

Favorite Store: The Kwik-E-Mark

Sayings: "Mmm" and "D�oh!"

Records he accomplished: Holds the plant record for most years worked at an entry-level position.
Got Springfield in the Duff book for World Records for being the fattest town.

Okay, there's a black widow at the door, a rattlesnake in the window, and a scorpion on the phone.
Do you: (A) None of the below, (B)...
-Homer asking Marge a question from the Quiz Master Book

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