Part 5

Ada replied, "Destroy the castle. We just can't make it to the top. It is too tall and huge!" Everyone started to move away from the building, letting the hippo do his own business. Ozzy turned around with his booty facing the castle and let out the biggest fart the world had ever smelled or heard. The ground shook and one of the castle walls crumbled. KelNino ran through the rubble first, shoving her way through boulders and dead bodies(she even managed to push over the bloated carcass of Missy Elliot - that just tells you how strong the reincarnated soul of Kurt Cobain really is). Ada and Ozzy followed close behind, bewildered at the power of the lead singer of Yo Mama. The others came as well and all eventually reached a hallway clear of debris. KelNino dusted herself off and wiped the glitter with which the body of Jennifer Lopez had been plastered from her face. Robin was turned on by this so he ate a banana as he watched the fight continue.

Something crunched under dreamer's huge platforms...a jumbo-size bowl of "Frosted Flakes" that Rockstar had been carrying along for little snacks.

"Yay! Frosted Flakes!" KelNino exclaimed in joy.

"They're called Frosties! Dammit!" Robin snapped back.

"Nuh-huh!" KelNino argued. "They're called Frosted Flakes!"

"Are not!"

"Are too!"

"Are not!"

"Are too!" The arguement continued to rage, so Ada, Ozzy, and the rest of the group left KelNino and Robin screaming in the hallway.

"They are not FrostieS!" KelNino screamed, "and that stupid BritTish Tony the Tiger is a queer! The Amerikin Tony could kick the chosen reject's asses! Yo Mama could kick your asses!"

"Could not!"

"Could too!"

The group continued and the sound of the fighting band leaders slowly faded away. The aproached a staircase, so dreamer decided to go up first. She slowly walked up the stairs-

"Damnit! Damnit!!!" yelled KelNino from downstairs. Robin ran back down to see what happened.

"No damnit-- you can't fit as many Cheerios up Jennifer Lopez's butt as you can Frosted Flakes-- YOU'RE WRONG!!"

"Am not!"

"Are too!"

"Am not!"

"Where's Daniel?" asked rockstar, looking around the room. In a corner she saw him snuggling up to Jessica Simpson. The only problem was, she had transformed herself into the type of person Daniel would like, down to the last detail. Only rockstar could see who she really was. She told fireangel to get a glass of water for her, and fireangel, hearing the urgency in rockstar's voice, hurriedly got the glass. She handed it to rockstar, and rockstar swiftly stood up, walked to the corner, shoved Daniel out of the way, and poured the water right over Jessica Simpson's head.

All the people in the room stopped what they were doing and stared. Before their eyes, the pretty brown-haired girl who just minutes ago had been getting a little too close to Daniel transformed into a shrimpy, skinny, blonde pop singer. She ran out of the room as quickly as possible while the rest of the inhabitants of the room realized who she was. Kelnino let out a loud cheer for rockstar, and Daniel thanked her for saving him from being completely taken over by the mindless popstar. But something still didn't seem right. With Robin upstairs, Kelnino, fireangel, rockstar, dreamer, and Daniel all near each other, rockstar got a bad feeling. There was another pop kid in the room - or somewhere in the house. Just then, they heard a muffled sound from upstairs. fireangel and Daniel stayed downstairs as Kelnino and rockstar raced up the stairs to see what was going on. All of a sudden it got very quiet. Then a stereo somewhere downstairs began playing the terrible tune (if it could even be called that) of "Candy". fireangel covered her ears and Daniel screamed as the obnoxious melody filled the house. Meanwhile, rockstar and Kelnino opened the door to the first room upstairs. Inside, Robin was preparing to throw Mandy Moore out the window.

"Wait, no!" Kelnino screamed. rockstar pulled the struggling teeniebopper away from Robin and dragged her downstairs. Daniel, Robin, fireangel, rockstar, and Kelnino shot her with a toy ray gun, but it obviously had some effect, because the music stopped and she lay lifeless on the floor.

"Good," fireangel said. "We got rid of them - for now." Daniel and Kelnino walked upstairs to find Robin throwing a tantrum and screaming "FROSTIES! FROSTIES!! THEY'RE CALLED FROSTIES!" Melinda, who happens to live in Battle Creek (the cereal city where the Kellogg's headquarters is located), heard this and stomped in carrying a box that reads "Frosted Flakes. They're Greeeeeat!"

"There!" she said, shoving the box into his hands. "It's settled! Now let's go kick some poppy ass!"

They walked down a long, bright pink, flower covered hallway.

"Ick! Only one person could stand such a place," Kelnino said in a disgusted voice.

Suddenly, out from behind a door popped Tony the Tiger! "They're grrrreat!" he shouted. Robin saw a perfect opportunity to prove that the blue box of Kellogg's cereal was, in fact, called Frosties.

"Hey Tony! Aren't they called 'Frosties'?" he asked. "Nuuuhh, but they're part of a complete breakfast!" Tony answered.

"Nono, you see, KelNino said--"

KelNino interrupted Robin. "Hold on hun, lemme check this out..." KelNino whipped out her favorite notebook, with which she plasters silverchair, newspaper articles and funny literature such as the story we read right now. "Oh, I get it!" she exclaimed. "You see, in Amerika, they're called Frosted Flakes, but in Oztralia and BrittTain, they're called Frosties. And look! The boxes are different too!" KelNino pointed to the magazine pictures and Frosted Flakes/Frosties from around the world. "Look at the Japanese one!"

"Oh...I get it now," Robin said in deep thought.

"Ohhhhhhhhhhhh!" everyone said together.

"They're grrrrrrreat!" Tony growled happily.

Kelnino was happy with her discovery, so she felt Tony could die. "Okay, Tony, you can shut up now." KelNino jammed her lovely, Oriental flaming sword into the Tiger's belly. Tony fell the ground whispering "grrrr-grrrr....grrreat..."

KelNino grabbed Robin's wrist and pushed through the crowd to continue up the stairs, but was blocked by Ozzy! He had a couple joints of weed and said "Want some? This is good s**t."

He started to light up one joint, but Kelnino screamed, "NO!!!!!! DON'T!!! You know this place is full of gasoline! If you light up your joint a fire will start up, and the whole place will catch on fire and we're all going to die!"

Ozzy looks up and saw Ricky Martin and Daniel hanging from the chandelier in a lurid embrace. Ozzy's match (the one he was going to use to light the joint) was put out by the gel dripping from Ricky's hair.

"You bloody wanking queer!" someone shouted up at them. Daniel dropped to the floor naked, with only a snakeskin thong (one of Ricky's) covering him. He got up and crawled to rockstar, taking her jacket for clothing.

"That is one WHITE ass!" Ozzy said and they all started laughing at Daniel, who started to shake rapidly behind the jacket.

"You guys are just too perverted to handle," Daniel mentioned, pulling the jacket tightly around his waist.

"Ohhh yeahhh babay...I'm soooo perverted..." Junta said, procceeding to touch Daniel on the shoulder.

"Get off!" Daniel screamed.

"Haha! But, you're so female-like..." Junta said, laughing as she took a pair of jeans out of her black mini German bread bag.

"Thank you..." Daniel said, slipping on the black jeans with a patch that says, "You all laugh because I'm different- I laugh because you're all the same." (Webmaster's note: I've got the same sticker!)

"Of course, Daniel. I may be a BIG perverted pedophile but, I'm a nice one..." Junta said, smirking at Kelnino, who, still holding the weapon she stabbed Tony the Tiger with, laughed at the thought of a little 100 pound Junta raping little men.

Daniel stood away from everyone as he buttoned the trenchcoat so his BIG "muscles" couldn't sweep everyone away.

"Let's see Daniel's huge muscles!" James said, pushing the sleeve down towards Daniel's wrist.

"Yes, I have been pumping iron during the journey to kill..." Daniel said, laughing at his own joke.

"Ohhh yes- you might win the heart of Travis from Blink 182 if you're not careful..." Junta said, holding her smile in.

"Are you serious...? Hmmm... *imagining a relationship with Travis* Yessss...it would be pleasant - wouldn't it?..." Daniel said, wiping Tony's blood off of his face.

"Well - pooooor tiger huh?" Kelnino said.

"Yeah - you're just mean...you Feos are just bitchy sometimes..." Daniel said.

"We know..." the Feos said, laughing as they watched Daniel scream.

Robin stood up and pushed Daniel out of the way. "I'm tired of Daniel getting the attention so I will interrupt. If you people want audio - wait damnit!" he said, staring at a certain few people from his guestbook.

The people of the guestbook walked slowly towards the door and bolted for parts unknown, nearly trampling a few of the tag-alongs in the process.

Black Ballroom cleared her throat. "Aren't we forgetting something?"

"Like what?" Ozzy looked somewhat confused.

"Why we're in this awful castle in the first place!"

"Oh yeah, *that,*" Robin grumbled. Daniel shot a look at him, about to spout a few choice words of his own, when dreamer and Ada reminded him and Ozzy why they *were* there, but even they didn't really know, they just kind of made something up so they could stay in the castle since it was getting pretty cold outside.

Everyone came back in, bringing with them a weirdly familiar guy that they had found wandering in the grass in front of the castle. He seemed to have some sort of amnesia, because he couldn't remember who he was or where he came from. Everyone agreed that he DID look very familiar, but they just couldn't decide who he was.

Suddenly Junta recognized him. "Oh my gosh, that's Trent Reznor!!!" rockstar couldn't believe that she hadn't known who he was, but it didn't matter, because the sound of Junta saying his name must have slightly sparked his memory.

Just then, Trent began to talk...but no one could hear him because rockstar was hyperventilating over the fact that *Trent Reznor* was there. "Trent Reznor! *puff* Trent Reznor!" Junta pulled rockstar aside until she could control herself. But as she pulled her aside they both bumped into...MARILYN MANSON!!! The shock-rocker had come to them with a mission that involved himself and Trent...

On to Part 6!

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