This week's been an adventure in patience, lemme tell ya. It's been like moving from the books to the classroom to the bed, in steady step, like a beautiful dance, except that it really wasn't that great to have to live through. I'm talking about doing way too much schoolwork. I'm good now, i'm out on the other end. I just have finals to worry about. There was so much last week that it's not worth my time to give any of it a mention. Suffice it to say that it hurt me, as a person. I really felt less dignity as a man, and i really did some medium-depth soul searching. And i found that i'm made of tougher stuff than i thought. I should have found this out years ago.

Friday was a great day, despite having pulled 2 all-nighters in the past 3 days, but i mean, that's healthy sometimes. And it gives you this emotional rush, this DRIVE to complete that thing whatever it is you're doing. Hey, i went as far as installing the Linux Command Interpreter on my machine, so i could work on Project 2 from my dorm. Still, all in all, i think i'm not looking at a good grade on that... I only did the minimum requirements, and some of option one, so i might pull a low B. Probably less.

Let's move on. I told you i wasn't going to discuss this. It's been talked about too much.

as an aside, to myself: it's interesting that i wrote that. I wrote that offhandedly, and it's accurate to how i feel, but it's uncannily like a similar situation that arose earlier this week. At first i just had to somehow trust this person that they knew what they were doing, when they were indisposed to talk about this one subject. I thought that was very odd, but i mean, they must know what they're talking about. Now i'm there somewhat. I just went through something greuling, and i've dug what gems i could out of it, and i'd rather not speak of it again. I think i get it. At least in essense.

So anyway, today after class and work, was NODROG, the Faculty-Staff talent show. It was pretty sweet, a lot of really talented acts, by some brilliant staff members. Some crazy skits too :-P Grady Spires, God bless him! The kid did a tapdance using bare feet and bottlecaps, Great-Depression-style. What a character..! And Hunt is a great country singer! I was THOROUGHLY impressed. Good stuff.

Jenn's boyfriend Dwight came down today, for the show and the after-party, where incidentally, Raynco played. They're like a sort of reggae, and they're really good! It's my first time hearing them; i keep missing their performances, which are everywhere, all the time, so i dunno why i keep missing them. Oh well. I might try getting their CD. Oh and Alexa's CD! She's got talent, i'll say that again. Check out this stuff at April 30, 2003. She continues to be amazing - she and her band won the Battle of the Bands earlier this week, against, among others, Raynco. So yeah. We here at Gordon aren't as awful as all that.

I remember those days... those days were just painful. My stomach never learned how to tie itself in two half hitches until then. I think something started growing in me then; i'll find out what it is, later. Something like a more real realization, an ability to see things from this incredibly new perspective, like clarity. And it's been hard to know what to do with.

So then today, guess what, Drew's being shafted and scrapped by the people in charge. We're basically not wanted, or that's the feeling we get. I don't want to say too much, because for all i know, it could be one huge enourmous misunderstanding. Later on, we'll know the fate of Drew, and if we actually are able to get them to let us keep this intentional men's community next year. Sigh.

Well, on that note, it's already Saturday. You guys, whoever reads this, thanks. It's gotta be weird, but hey, i write these things for other people's benefits, whatever they want to gather from it, as well as my own. Thanks for the time spent, thanks for being my friend. (i'm assuming that only my friends read this :-P)

goodnight.