TheOtherStory, TOS
Dan's clone-son, a cheerfully submissive nudist.
(A man that looks very much like Dan enters a dating service completely naked)
HI! My name is TOS and I would like to record some background information about myself to help you get to know me a little better before we meet. First, I am Dan's son/clone. (Dan of course being Dan of COD the CultOf Dan. He is the "father" in the CODly trinity known as the "Father Son and Holy Goat". I am the Son.) I was raised in the womb of a goat (Betsy the "Holy Goat" who also doubles as our Angel of Death). Betsy and I are now a loving couple, our relationship is very open; so don't worry about getting assaulted if we should ever meet. You probably WILL be assaulted by Betsy, but in a good way. Our relationship is not exactly incestuous because I am a clone of Dan's and Betsy is only sort of my mom. It IS bestiality though, and thank COD Dan has worked so hard to break down the walls of hate that prevent consensual humans and farm animals from having freaky sex in national monuments after dark. I was named TOS (short for "TheOtherStory") after a column I write for "Fresh COD", Dan's weekly newsletter. Some find that hard to believe since I was born before the column actually started, but Dan works in mysterious ways!
I have pretty typical interests; very similar to Dan's in fact. We both love apple pie, men, women, goats, and other assorted farm animals, along with the occasional inanimate object. I actually HAVE free will, but don't be afraid, I rarely use it and it's mainly there so I can help run the cult if Dan is accidentally incapacitated or temporarily killed. That actually happened once, but since I am Dan's clone, we cloned Dan from me and Betsy carried Dan in her womb. A little ritualistic jell0 orgy and a few prayers later, Dan was back and our family tree grew increasingly complicated.
I also am very active in politics. Betsy and I recently ran for President and Vice President but did not receive a single vote, not even our own. I think this is probably a voting machine error though because we DID impregnate a lot of Chads. Or at least we tried to; apparently it's almost impossible to get a man pregnant. It looked a lot easier in that movie "Junior" that Arnold Schwarzenager did a few years ago.
My first action in the realm of politics was a protest I organized to fight the unfair way our society treats goats. When Betsy and I were first dating, we used to try to go to the movies and were turned away by racist movie theatre owners that banned animals from the movie theatres. The protest took the form of orange coffee cups hanging from stop signs all over the world. Countless COD members and those sympathetic to our plight began hanging orange coffee cups from stop signs until the world was DELUGED with orange coffee cups. I am sure you saw many of them.
I also stay naked almost constantly. When I have to go to a parent teacher conference at school (Betsy and I adopted a fine young COD drone named Jell0 Slinky Toy, one of our earliest converts, and I also was stepfather to a child conceived by Betsy and Binky, PrincessEgoat) I wear a clip on tie attached to my nipple. If it's a BIG event, I wear a clip-on on each nipple. I used to play hide-and-go seek with other peoples nipples and gonads, but since I have a pretty limited attention span, I had to give it up, at least for a while.
What I am looking for in a date is a mindless drone with no free will that enjoys ritualistic ceremonial orgies, naked twister, and my favorite TV show, Pinky and the Brain. (Trivia time! Did you know the REAL world ended after an episode of Pinky and the brain last year and we are currently living in an illusionary world created by Binky as a prison and later turned into a recruiting ground for COD by Dan? Well now you do!)
I want someone that can appreciate a man that has the ability to think freely and instead chooses to be as stupid as possible, so that the mindless drones of Dan can learn from my example. That's just the kind of guy I am. If you think you might be interested, some sort of mental health care professional is probably currently treating you. Call ME before your psychiatrist. I may not have a degree in psychology, but I do have a kinky kielbasa fetish and a warm smile.
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