[ H Y B R I D ], The Site Magazine is the collection of different elements & articles in which some are from me myself, some from books & magazines , some from medias, some from my frens and some from others, but mind that its a collection & you can't say it as a copy. I think this collection works to you all because mind its a collection and some creativity indeed. I've taken this work as one of the cool work on the site. Well how do you find? Hey guyz, I also need your help. So do help me with your articles & other elements that you can send for this site magazine no matter what the source & the thing would be. Send it to me if you've got anything to my email. Any of the element send by you is highly appreciated. So guyz, its now time to check the site magazine out & yes, don't forget to comment about this page.


Made In Nepal Viruses 

Virus Name

Description
Government Virus Nothing works on your computer, but all your diagnostic software says everything is fine
NTV Virus Plays the National Anthem every time you start & shutdown your computer 
Karmachari Virus Makes your Pentium III computer perform like a 1st generation computer
Traffic Police Virus Divides your program window into multiple lanes with unsightly orange Hilltake icons
Kisunji Virus A message appears on the status bar, "I will turn your Floppy Drive into 20 GB Hard Drive in 5 years"
Municipality Virus Puts up a bill on your monitor for parking your mouse on the mouse pad
Bollywood Virus Yells, "Kuttea, Kaminae, Haramjada ! Mein tujhko jaan se maar dalunga !" every time you try to delete a file

 


Me And My Teacher (Humorous)

When my teacher talks, he is lecturing
When I talk, I am making noise
When my teacher laughs, he is using his sense
When I laugh, I am disturbing the class
When my teacher rests, he isn't well
When I rest, I am neglecting his lecture
When my teacher is late for class, he had been delayed
When I am late for class, I had been roaming around
When my teacher converses with girls, he is advising
When I converse with girls, I am flirting
When my teacher smiles, he is being cool
When I smile, I am making fun of him
When my teacher does in style, he is great
When I do in style, I am showing off
When my teacher makes mistake, mistakes are committed by everyone
When I make a mistake, I am not paying an attention
When my teacher shouts, he is angry with us
When I shout, I am challenging him
When my teacher is polite, he is being understandable
When I am being polite, I am polishing him for the marks


Humorous Teaser

* Why do music composers wave a stick when they play?
        Just to insure that the music players don't feel asleep 
* Why does fishes never get angry?
        Because they are cold blooded animals
* Why do we walk?
        Because we can't fly
* If love is blind, then how can love at first sight be possible?
        Because only love is blind, not the lovers
* Why does rainfall comes in the form of droplets?
        Because if it doesn't falls in the form of droplets, it would be called waterfall instead
* If a man borns in Nepal, grows up in Germany, studies in UK, gradutes in   US, does a job in Japan, marries in Spain, goes to Switzerland & dies in   India, what is he?
        C'mon, he is dead
* When does car go exactly as fast as the train?
        When the car is in the train
* What question can never be answered by 'yes'?
        Are you asleep?
* Where can you always find happiness?
        In the dictionary
* Why do we buy clothes?
        Because we can't get it free
* What did male octupus said to female octupus on the Valentine's day?
        "I want to hold your hand hand hand ..."                         * When is the best time to pick up fruits?
        When the farmer is not looking

Jokes

Patient : I have no sleeps in the night
Doctor  : Don't worry, you can apply for the job of a night watchman

(Math teacher to his student)
Teacher : If Himalayas are 5000 yrs old, how old am I?
Student : You are 42, Sir.
Teacher : Good, but how did you know it?
Student : Because my brother is half-mad and he is 21.

Teacher : Do you obey your parents?
Student : Yes, I obey twice more as they say
Teacher : How do you?
Student : They tell me to have 50, but I take 100 from their pocket 

A : "When he was born, the army fired a 21 gun salute"
B : "Too bad, they missed all!"

Teacher : When was Rome built?
Student : In the night
Teacher : What made you say that?
Student : Because once you told that, 'Rome was not built in a day'

(One day, a boy was crying in the classroom)
Teacher : What's the matter, boy?
Boy     : Anything that occupies space, has weight & can be perceived by our sense

Teacher : Name one animal that is found in the desert
Student : A camel
Teacher : Good, name another animal?
Student : Another camel

A : Why do women hates alcohol?
B : Because, after drinking it, their mouse like husbands become lions

Once Sardar Ji was about to travel in an airplane for the first time. As he was very afraid, he closed his eyes and got inside the plane. After he was on his seat, he slowly opened his eyes and looked out of the window. 'Oh ! My Goodness !' he exclaimed. 'People looks as small as ants from here'. A gentleman who was sitting beside him said, 'Those are ants, my dear. The airplane hasn't taken off yet'

Ashish : My father knows the year, month & the hour of his death
Jimmy  : Oh! really? But how's that possible?
Ashish : The judge told him

A lady was horrified to see Subin smoking on the street. She walked up to him and said, 'Do your parents know you smoke?'. Subin answered, 'Lady, does your husband know you speaking to a strange man?'                                      

Defination of the word 'Wife'
Some says that without Wife, there is no life. But I say that Wife is that sharp knife that cuts our half life

A simple but easy tip for you when you are at the bathroom and the bathroom does not have a lock, "Well just sing a song when you are at the bathroom"


Quotations, Sayings, Proverbs & Footnotes

 

 


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