Chapter 3
Archer and Shran made their way through the caves, with Ghed cheeping cheerfully in the pocket of Shran’s uniform that he usually carried his communicator in. Now it was the perfect little carrier for a newborn chickling that seemed to have made it its life’s goal to drive two fully-grown men to madness by not shutting up!
“Pink-skin you carry him for a while. I can’t take him anymore.”
“How is my carrying him any different from you carrying him? It won't muffle the sound.”
“Maybe not but it’ll make it much harder for me to kill him if he doesn’t shut up.”
“Maybe he’s hungry again.”
“He ate an hour ago!”
“Well try it! For all we know he was still full from whatever sustained him in the egg before he was born when we fed him the first time.”
“Oh thank you I really want to consider what was in that stuff he left in my hand.” Shran sneered, even as he pulled out the bar and crumbled some into his hand. Ghed ate it, giving them a brief respite before resuming with even more vigour.
“Cheep! Cheep! Cheep, cheep, cheep!”
“Pink-skin!” Shran was actually beginning to sound desperate.
“Ok, Ok, give him here.” Archer held his hand out and Shran was quick to hand the chickling over. Then Archer unzipped his breast-pocket and slipped Ghed into it. Through the material he could feel the warmth of the chickling as he squirmed to get comfy, his little head poking out of the pocket and looking around from his new angle. Shran stared at him for a moment, looking thoughtful. “What is it?”
“Nothing. He just looks kind of cute like that.”
“I guess- wait! Did you just say cute?”
“Yes, why?”
“Nothing I just never thought a tough solider like you would call anything cute.”
“My nieces and nephews are cute. And Ghed is cute- when he’s quiet.”
“Cheep!” Ghed sounded like he agreed. Shran massaged his brow with one hand.
“He’s is more annoying than my sister and I cannot believe I just said that!”
“You have a sister?”
“Two. Both older.”
“Any brothers?”
“Two as well, also older. I had a third, but he died fighting with the Vulcans.”
“Sorry.”
“It’s all right. I’m used to it by now.”
“So… you're the baby of your family?” Archer grinned at the thought. It was pretty funny to think of the tough Commander Shran as a baby.
“Much as it pains me to admit it, yes. What about you?”
“Only child.”
“That’s rare on Andoria.”
“Really, pretty common on Earth.”
“Weird.” Shran scrunched his nose at the thought. Archer felt amused at the look on his face. “Shall we?” Shran extended his arm out in the direction they’d been going. Archer grinned and they continued on. Ghed was mercifully quieter, although he hadn’t shut up altogether, still cheeping sometimes, usually when they shone a light on something that was odd looking, like an unusual stalagmite formation. To Archer it was seriously beginning to sound like he was saying,
“Look daddies! Look at the weird rock.”
Archer decided not to mention this to Shran, as he was pretty sure the Andorian would have him committed once they got out.
“Wait.” Shran stuck out his arm, catching Archer in the stomach. “Do you hear that?”
“Hear what?”
“Sounds like running water.”
Archer listened and realised the Andorian was right, there was running water nearby, it sounded like a lot of it. Then he noticed something else. “Does the air feel warmer to you?”
“A little.”
“Cheep!”
Both men looked down at Ghed who stared back as if to say ‘Well I haven’t said anything in a while.’ Shran shook his head and shared a look with Archer, one that seemed to be saying he was concerned for his own sanity. Archer knew how he felt.
“I think the sound is coming from that direction.” said Shran, pointing to their left.
“Yeah, I agree.”
They walked down the left tunnel, torches lighting the way. What they found was most surprising.
An underwater hot-spring. It was about the size of a standard gym pool and Archer was pretty sure he’d be able to stand in the water with his head and shoulders out of the water. He found himself wondering where the water would come to on Shran.
“Cheeeeep.” Ghed seemed to approve. Shran looked impressed.
“It’s like the hot springs on Andoria.”
“Andoria has hot springs?”
“Of course, they’re one of the sources of geothermal energy we have.” Shran smirked, “I love swimming in them during a real cold day. Nothing better!” Shran looked at the water with a narrow eye and then reached out and gently removed Ghed from Archer’s pocket. “You like swimming pink-skin?”
“Yeah I love it.”
“You a good swimmer?”
“I’m a pretty good swimmer, yeah.” Archer grinned. Shran smirked at him. Then he pushed Archer into the water.
The warmth was a welcome shock to Archer, and he was quick to react, pushing off the bottom to surface, spluttering like mad. Shran was howling with laughter at him, doubled over and shaking. Ghed was chirping and hopping around on the rock, apparently just as amused as his Andorian daddy.
“Ok, ok, very cute. Yes.” sneered Archer, swimming over to the edge. Shran straightened up, grinning widely. Archer couldn’t help but notice how handsome Shran was when he was grinning with amusement.
“Sorry pink-skin, couldn’t resist.”
“Yes well, now not only have you covered me in chicken crap, you’ve also soaked me to the skin. Are you planning on doing anything else to make my clothes uncomfortable?”
“Not at the moment.” Shran smirked, “Besides, the chicken crap is gone, see.” He pointed at Archer’s shoulder. Archer looked to see the chicken crap had indeed been washed away.
“Ok, but I’m still soaked. Now help me out!” Archer held his hand out. Shran, sniggering still, grabbed his forearm. Silly Andorian.
Archer pulled hard and pulled Shran right over his head into the water. After a moment Shran surface, coughing up water.
“Pink-skin!” he exclaimed, spiting water out.
“We’re even now.” Archer laughed, amused to see Shran’s chin was underwater, so every time he opened his mouth he got a mouthful of water.
“Oh I’m going to get you for that!” Shran lunged at Archer and shoved his head under the water. Archer laughed under the water and grabbed Shran around the middle, pulling him under too. They rolled around, wrestling under the water, until they both had to come up for air. As they caught their breath the two men were laughing. When Shran had recovered enough he jumped at Archer again. Archer ducked under Shran’s arm and pulled Shran down again. Shran wriggled in his grip, trying to escape, and in an attempt to keep a hold on him, Archer gripped onto his ribcage. What happened next came as a shock.
The unmistakable sound of a giggle came out of Shran’s mouth. Even underwater there was no mistaking that sound. Archer grinned in a devilish manner. So the Andorian was ticklish was he? Well Archer was more than happy to use that to his advantage. If the Andorian tickles were anything like the Human tickles…
Archer dug his fingers into Shran’s ribs again and Shran snorted with laughter as he struggled to get away. The sound was infectious and Archer laughed too as he mercilessly tickled the Andorian.
“Stop! Stop!” shouted Shran, he was laughing so hard he was having trouble breathing. “Cut it out pink-skin!” Archer eased up a little so the Andorian didn’t start to drown but he held onto him so Shran didn’t try to escape. “I’m going to kill you for that!” Shran promised, despite the fact that he was grinning.
“Like to see you try!” challenged Archer. Considering he was holding the smaller man around the middle, back to chest, with a solid grip on him despite the water, it certainly wasn’t going to be easy for the Andorian to pull free. However Shran had a different tactic.
Wriggling around so he was facing Archer, he grabbed him by the back of his head and kissed him. Archer was stunned beyond thought as the Andorian plundered his mouth. His arms loosened and he relaxed into the kiss a little, finding it, as Jhamel would say, ‘Strangely Enjoyable’.
Shran pulled away and smirked, before dunking Archer again and moving behind the Human, poking at his ribs and legs to find his ticklish point. For Archer it was his legs and neck more than his ribs. When Archer wriggled away as Shran poked and tickled his thigh the Andorian grinned in a near frightening way and attacked the limbs without mercy, sending Archer into a spasm of laughter and causing him to wriggle like an eel in the Andorians grip.
“Mercy! Mercy!” Archer cried as he broke the surface. Shran ignored him and continued his attack, his smirk firmly in place. Archer growled in a playful way and pulled his legs away and grabbed the Andorian again, pinning his arms to his sides. They both fell under the surface again and Archer found himself returning the favour and kissing Shran. He was rather surprised when the Andorian kissed back, gripping his head to deepen it. However it was all too brief, as they needed to resurface to breath.
Both men were slightly dizzy as they gasped for air, holding onto the edge of the pool to steady themselves. Once they caught their breath, they looked at each other, Shran with a curiosity and Archer with a questioning.
“Cheep!”
They both jumped as they looked at Ghed who was giving them a look that seemed to say to them, ‘You forgot about me daddies.’ The little lilac chickling waddled along the edge of the pool between Archer and Shran, who were watching him with great intensity, leaning over every few steps and examining the pool. As he did this a sixth time, the chickling fell in and sank like a stone.
“Ah!” Both Shran and Archer were quick and caught him between their fingers, lifting him out of the water.
“Cheep.” said a soaked Ghed. He looked very miserable.
“I thought he’d have been able to swim.” said Archer, “His feet are like duckling feet, and ducklings swim.”
“Well… maybe he can, he just needs to learn how.” said Shran, shrugging. “If we hold him like this he might figure out what to do.”
“Can’t hurt to try.”
They lowered the chickling into the water just enough that his blue legs were under the water. Ghed didn’t seem to appreciate this and let out a shrill cheep. Neither Archer nor Shran lifted him out, both silently urging him to try. After a few minutes of fussing Ghed stopped cheeping and seemed to accept that he wasn’t getting out of this until he tried.
Pedalling his little legs, he lifted his sulking head as he stayed afloat, even as his ‘daddies’ dropped their hands.
“Cheep! Cheep, cheep, cheep, cheep!” And he was off! His little downy tail fluttering as he made his merry way over the surface of the pool.
“Go Ghed Go!” cheered Archer, raising a fist in victory. Shran was chuckling to himself, although whether it was at Ghed or Archer was unclear. Shran pulled himself out of the pool, sitting at the edge of it. He pulled off his boots and poured the water out of them and then pulled his socks off and wrung them out. Archer did the same as they watched Ghed swim around.
“He looks proud of himself.” said Shran, amused by the way Ghed was holding his head up so high in the air and cheeping every few minutes.
“And so he should. He only hatched yesterday.” Archer said, grinning. Shran pulled a puzzled face,
“What if his species is meant to be able to swim after they hatch? Then it’s not that big of a deal.”
“Don’t ruin the moment!” scolded Archer, giving him a light shove. Shran rolled his eyes, looking highly amused.
“Pink-skins.” he muttered, shaking his head, but he was smiling. Archer grinned at him as he unzipped his jumpsuit and pulled it off.
“How long do you think it’ll take for our clothes to dry?”
“I don’t know. I’ve got a spare uniform in my pack.” said Shran as he pulled off his uniform shirt. The skintight leather was so fitted it had to be rolled up his torso before he could pull it off over his head.
“Well I don’t. Great. I’m gonna have to sit around in my underwear until my uniform dries off!” Archer scowled a little at the annoyance.
“Did you bring your phaser?” asked Shran as he pulled off his trousers.
“No. Why?”
“Well I’ve got mine. We can use the energy to heat up the rocks and drape our uniforms on them to dry off.”
“You make it sound like you’re used to this kind of thing.”
“I’ve been in space a long time pink-skin. I’ve been in a lot of situations. And yes some of them have been similar to this. Although it certainly didn’t involve a lilac chickling… who is currently drowning!” Shran dived into the water and swam over to Ghed, pulling him out of the water. The chickling must have lost it’s balance or something and sunk.
“Cheep.” Ghed sounded like he’d had enough fun for the day. Shran smiled as he wadded back to the edge and set Ghed on the ground. Ghed shook himself out, causing his down to fluff up and make him look like a furball. If Archer was honest with himself, he looked like that grumpy owl from Disney’s ‘The Sword in the Stone’.
Shran hauled himself out of the water and dug out his phaser, and changed the setting. Then he picked a large, flat mound and shot it with a long, low burst of phaser particles. The rock turned red with heat. Shran set down his phaser and then draped his uniform over the warm rock. Archer did the same with his jumpsuit and black shirt. Then they sat down near the rocks to dry off themselves. Ghed waddled over to the rock and plopped himself down beside it, shutting his eyes and going asleep. Archer and Shran sat in silence for a few minutes before Shran stretched his neck and antennas, leaning his head back, chuckling quietly,
“What a day! I have to say it’s been one of my weirder ones. And I’ve had some very weird ones.”
“I can imagine. I’ve had some weird ones too.”
“One time, Keval and Thon messed with a device they didn’t know anything about. I left them alone for ten minutes, and when I came back I found two bawling toddlers in their place. Took ages to figure out how to restore them to normal.”
“I must admit that never happened with me… be kinda funny thought if it happened to someone like T'Pol. Can you imagine her as a baby?” They both began to laugh at the idea.
“The novelty wears off after a while. For what ever reason they decided I was their father and wouldn’t give me a moments peace. And with Thon having… well anyway it was annoying.”
“Is there something wrong with him?”
“Not wrong, he’s just got what you would call Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. It’s not that bad, otherwise he wouldn’t be in the Guard. He just has strange habits.”
“Like what?”
“Like in the morning he has to poke the first person he meets in the nose and say ‘bink’. Since it’s usually me or Tholos or Keval who he meets first thing we don’t really notice it.”
“You mentioned he had to stay away from trees? What’s that about?”
“Oh.” Shran sniggered, “It’s not really to do with his… habits, it’s just that he likes to climb trees, but he can’t climb back down and I’m the only one he’ll let help him down. It’s sometimes annoying having to be the leader.”
“I know what you mean.” Archer shook his head.
“Especially when you have to apologise for something your solider did. Thon once did his morning habit on a Kaxtonian.”
“I can imagine how that went.”
“Took me hours to explain to them that no, Thon was not making a lewd sexual gesture… is everything sexual with that lot?”
“Putting food in your mouth is, I know that for a fact.”
“Pompous idiots.” snorted Shran, “Why the hell can’t they warn us about all this stuff instead of letting us make idiots out of ourselves first and then explaining it?”
“Because then they wouldn’t get to see us in body paint and beads trying to make up for it.”
Shran burst out laughing at that. “Oh don’t talk to me about it! I swear, I thought Thon would die of laughter. Last time I bring him anywhere.”
As their laughter died down, they fell into a comfortable silence, leaning against the cooler rock. After a while Archer had to ask the question that was bouncing around in his head.
“Why did you kiss me?”
“I thought it would distract you. It did.” Shran smirked at him.
“Oh.”
“Why did you kiss me?”
“Honestly? I’ve no idea. I just felt like it.”
“Fine with me.”
“Huh?”
“Well, it’s not as if you're a terrible kisser.” Shran looked him over with that same curiosity as before.
“Thanks, you're not bad yourself.” Archer allowed himself to look the half naked Andorian over. “So… have you ever… you know, with a man?”
“You mean have I ever had sex with a man?”
“Yeah.” Archer flushed.
“Of course.” Shran grinned, “Plenty of them.”
“Oh, so have you ever been with a woman?”
“Of course! What kind of weird questions are these?”
“I’m just wondering whether you're…”
“What?” Shran looked very lost. Archer had to admit he liked the look on him.
“Do Andorians have orientations? Or do you have relations with whoever you want regardless of gender?”
“I have no idea what orientations you are talking about but yes, we have sex with whoever we want, never mind gender, race, whatever.”
“Ah, so you’ve been round the block a few times.”
“If I’m understanding you right, I’d say far more than a few times. What about you?”
“Yeah, a fair few times.”
“Do you usually quiz someone about their mating habits?”
“Well… don’t want to offend anyone.” Archer grinned. Shran smirked.
“Word of advice if you’re going to… how do you put it? Branch out? Avoid Klingon females in heat on a planet where the temperature reaches 50. It’s quite exhausting.”
Archer’s eyed widened in surprise as Shran smirked at him. “Thanks for the advice.”
“You're welcome pink-skin.”
They both sat in silence again, dozing off in the heat of the geyser and rocks. Ghed ruffled his feathers a few times, but stayed quiet. At last Archer said,
“Feels like they’re dry. We should get dressed, it’ll be sunset soon.”
“I suppose.” Shran sounded like he was half asleep and too comfy to care. Archer grinned and reached over, poking the Andorian in the ribs. Shran yelped and sat up. “Evil pink-skin.” he grumbled, rubbing his eyes as he stood up.
“Yup!” Archer smiled, buttoning up his shirt and then pulling on his jumpsuit. Shran pulled his shirt on over his head, squirming in it to make it sit right. When they were both fully-dressed they grabbed their bags and torches. “Ghed! Come on!” Archer called, figuring it was worth a shot.
“Cheep! Cheep!” Ghed came scurrying after them, running so fast he tripped and flew for a second before landing and rolling along the ground. “…Cheep.” Poor Ghed sat on his fluffy butt and looked up at his daddies, dejected.
“Bad first day.” said Shran, picking him up and setting him on his shoulder. Ghed nipped his ear with affection. Shran rolled his eyes. “Come on, let’s get back.”