Ahhhh, the smell of books in the morning. Nothing beats waking up early to study because you decided to play Scrabble the night before. I say we all break loose and forget responsibility for one day. I have already decided to take a day off from being Personnel because I figure that way I can be loud all I want, and no one can tell me I should be part of the solution, not part of the problem. I can also make a mistake without getting punished because it is somehow �my job� to bring about world peace. The way I see it, who cares if you fail your final! In a few years is it really going to matter? I say we spit on our professors and show them who is really boss by not studying. Yeah! That will show them. We�ll just go in there, write our names on the scantron, and turn it in�blank. That takes real guts. All of these professors trying to teach us to make it in the real world forgot about the real values�assertiveness, courage, and fearlessness. This new revolution I�m trying to start relies completely on these ideals. We have to stand up! We have to have the strength to say, �No! I will not study. No! I will not learn. No! I will not succumb to the overpowering iron fist of the higher educators.� This is our world and our school. We can make a difference. So make your mark�fail a test today!
JOKE OF THE MONTH:
A man is in bed with his wife when there is a knock on the door. He looks at his clock, and it's 3am. Not wanting to get out of bed, he rolls over. Then, a louder knock follows. His wife asks him if he is going to answer it, so he drags himself out of bed and goes downstairs. He opens the door, and there is man standing at the door. It didn't take the homeowner long to realize the man was drunk. "Hi there," slurs the stranger. "Can you give me a push?" "No, get lost. It's 3am. I was in bed," says the man and slams the door. He goes back up to bed and tells his wife what happened. Appalled, she says, "That wasn't very nice of you. Remember that night we broke down in the pouring rain on the way to pick the kids up from the baby sitter, and you had to knock on that man's door to get help? What would have happened if he'd told usto get lost?" "But the guy was drunk," says the husband. "It doesn't matter," says the wife. "He needs our help, and it would be the right thing to help him." The husband gets out of bed again, gets dressed, and goes downstairs. He opens the door, and not being able to see the stranger anywhere he shouts, "Hey, do you still want a push?" He hears a voice cry out, "Yeah, please." Still being unable to see the stranger, he shouts, "Where are you?" The stranger replies, "I'm over here, on your swing."
RANDOM ACTS OF�INSANITY:
Note to self (and all of you of course): Do not assume that because the weather was nice yesterday it will be nice today. This is Montana after all. I learned this the hard way, and so did some of my friends. Sunday morning I wake up thinking I�m going to church. However, there was some sort of time change that everyone thought was okay to do without asking me first, so I had missed church. Luckily, Jonna had a plan��We can go on a hike!� Now, I should clarify that this �hike� was a paved road, practically flat, but slanted enough to require more energy than an everyday walk, which is the only reason I agreed to go! We conned a few others into going, and before long we had a packed car headed up the mountain. As we climbed the winding road higher and higher the snow on the road became thicker and thicker until there were 2 grooves in the road holding us on it. Needless to say only one car could possibly drive down the road at a time, so what happened next was pretty much inevitable. We were already getting worried because the scraping sound that was being created by the frozen snow against the bottom of Amanda�s grandma car was not good to say the least. Just as we were trying to figure a way out, we looked up to see another car coming toward us having the same problem. As we sat there laughing and taking pictures, more and more cars began to pull up behind that one. Turning around there was not an option, so we had to drive backwards down a snowy mountain pass until it cleared enough for us to turn around. We didn�t get any exercise that day, but I feel like we bonded on some deeper level. Not to mention the other side of Amanda no one knew about�yikes, Cruella!
QUOTE CORNER:
�Check out the name tag. You�re in my world now, grandma.� �Evil Nurse (Ben Stiller)
DEEP THOUGHTS:
Too bad you can't buy a voodoo globe so that you could make the earth spin real fast and freak everybody out.
WORDS FROM THE WISE:
For those of you who don�t know, I work at the hockey rink here in Bozeman. About half of my sorority works there as well. It is usually quite fun unless it is the National Championship, and you have worked four games in two days. Then it gets a little long. This is exactly what happened last weekend. Have you ever gotten so tired that everything becomes extremely hilarious, and you find yourself laughing at absolutely nothing? Well, during the last half of the championship game, Laura and I had long surpassed that point. Everything was hysterical, and we could barely pull ourselves together enough to work. We saw an old cowboy man fall on the stairs, a few people with toilet paper stuck to their shoes, and the box o� junk go flying after Laura stepped in it. At the end of the night while we were cleaning, I decided we needed to �suck the place dry� since it was our last night. I told Laura to take a bunch of candy, and I took some for myself. I really wanted to take something bigger, though. Unfortunately, all of the pictures and posters were bolted to the wall (smart move). Laura suggested we take the light-up Budlight sign, but I didn�t think it was going to fly for us to say we were taking it home to fix it. I said I was going to take one of the pom poms, but then this lady told us we could have one, so taking one wasn�t fun anymore. Finally, we decided we had wasted enough time on the clock, and left. When we got back to the house I said to Laura, �A few candy bars and a pom pom is hardly sucking the place dry.� Laura laughed, but all I could do was shake my head and walk away.
Moral: Do unto others as you would have them do to you. Take from others what they won�t give to you�and can�t catch you with.
BRITTANY�S THOUGHTS ON FORWARDED MESSAGES:
A forward today, a black eye tomorrow
Can you really live with this sorrow?
Think long and hard of what you would do
Cuz if you choose to send, this dream will come true.
My friends I do love until the end,
But my hate for your forwards makes enemies of friends.
I do not like reading the retarded jokes.
I�d rather practice self-defense on escaping chokes.
So now it is time to repeat what I�ve said:
Don�t send me forwards�it will be your head!
MY SISTER THE RETARD:
My sister came to Bozeman to visit for a few days. I took her to Johnny Carinos for dinner one night. She is a big pasta fan, so I knew she�d like it. Little did I know that liking to eat something and knowing how to pronounce it do not always go hand in hand. She looked through the menu a couple of times and finally decided on the Penne Gorgonzola�a mouthful in every sense of the word. When the waitress walked up and asked if we were ready to order, Blake quickly chimed in and said, �Yes, I�ll have the peenee Godzilla.� We all died laughing (except the waitress who seemed annoyed and promptly corrected her). Next time we go out I�ll have to have her clear her order with me first to spare ourselves the embarrassment.
