Beware of the psycho roommate. They are everywhere. I recently lost my first roommate to a girl across the hall who had recently lost her roommate to a girl upstairs who never got a roommate assigned to her. Anyway, my new roommie is way neato, and I'm happy that the confusion worked out in my favor. However, Gina (my roommie) had to endure more than her share of "the psycho roommate syndrome." You could never completely understand the magnitude of this girl's weirdness without meeting her in person. First, she is the messiest person on earth. She had so much junk in a pile on her floor that I couldn't stand in there for more than five minutes without wanting to start cleaning like mad or get the heck out!! Second, she says the oddest things at the oddest times. She likes to be right which can best be illustrated by her screaming argument that SHE DID NOT HAVE TO HAVE A FINE ARTS CREDIT IN ORDER TO GRADUATE. She argued this point for about 20 minutes only to find out that she did infact have to have a fine arts credit. Ooops! Well, consider yourself warned, and whatever you do--Don't be the psycho roommate!
JOKE OF THE MONTH:
A man was in his front yard mowing grass when his attractive blonde female neighbor came out of the house and went straight to the mailbox. She opened it then slammed it shut and stormed back into the house. A little later she came out of her house again went to the mailbox and again opened it, slammed it shut again. Angrily back into the house she went. As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, here she cam out again, marched to the mail box, opened it and then slammed it closed harder then ever. Puzzled by her actions the man asked her, "Is something wrong?" To which she replied, "There certainly is!" My stupid computer keeps saying,"YOU'VE GOT MAIL."
QUOTE CORNER:
"You are the lucky ones." -Lynn S.
"You like the rye chips?! I hate the rye chips! They burn my mouth!" -drunk guy
"I think a seedpod is sexy enough without having to smile at the photographer." -Ruth Bernhard
"Well, I guess my dad has a kidney stone again." -Laura Y.
WORDS FROM THE WISE:
The other day while walking to the SUB with a couple of my friends, we encountered quite a humorous group of guys. When they saw us walking their way, one of the pointed and said to his buddies, "Look, girls!" They all stopped so quickly that they ran into each other. They were completely awe struck. Upon closer observation, we could tell that they were drunk, but it was funny to watch them stare. They tried to make intelligent conversation (you can imagine how well that went-it's a little hard to make intelligent conversation about Gardettos.) After they left, we laughed so hard. We thought it was funny that we could only get the drunk guys. The moral: Everyone is good-looking to a drunk guy.no wait.that's not right.oh well!!
THE DATING GAME:
Gina and a guy in her speech class had a moment! She told me that he was giving a speech to her class, and he kept making eye contact with her. He wouldn't stop looking at her the whole speech. At one particular place in the speech, he began to stare even more deeply into her eyes. Then, he stopped talking for a minute. He suddenly came out of his trance and said, "Oh, I forgot what I was going to say." Hmmmmm, do I smell love in the air? I think so!
MY SISTER THE RETARD:
I called my family from college one day to tell them that I got a new roommate. I was talking to my sister, and she was telling me about school and homecoming and all sorts of stuff when I heard my mom in the background saying that she needed to get off soon. I said, "Well, I guess we have to go." Blake said, "Yeah. So, you got a new roommate, have you guys farted in front of each other yet?" I started laughing and said, "No." She said, "Okay, well let me know when you do "k." bye!" Then she hung up! What a weirdo!
YOURS:
HOW DO YOU DECIDE WHO TO MARRY?
You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like, if you like sports, she should like it that you like sports, and she should keep the chips and dip coming. * Alan, age 10
HOW CAN A STRANGER TELL IF TWO PEOPLE ARE MARRIED?
You might have to guess, based on whether they seem to be yelling at the same kids. * Derrick, age 8
WHAT DO MOST PEOPLE DO ON A DATE?
On the first date, they just tell each other lies, and that usually get them interested enough to go for a second date. * Martin, age 10
WHAT WOULD YOU DO ON A FIRST DATE THAT WAS TURNING SOUR?
I'd run home and play dead. The next day I would call all the newspapers and make sure they wrote about me in all the dead columns. * Craig, age 9
WHEN IS IT OKAY TO KISS SOMEONE?
The law says you have to be eighteen, so I wouldn't want to mess with that. * Curt, age 6
The rule goes like this: If you kiss someone, then you should marry them and have kids with them. It's the right thing to do. * Howard, age 8
IS IT BETTER TO BE SINGLE OR MARRIED?
It's better for girls to be single but not for boys. Boys need someone to clean up after them. * Anita, age 9
HOW WOULD THE WORLD BE DIFFERENT IF PEOPLE DIDN'T GET MARRIED?
There sure would be a lot of kids to explain, wouldn't there? * Kelvin, age 9
-submitted by Heather
OTHER NEWS:
Well, we lost our homecoming game-big shocker!! I'm just glad to say that the little while I was actually at the game, we were winning.
-brit
