i think one of the things that makes it hard is that it can be really hard to process and channel something like a brain aneurysm. i mean, (sorry i hope i�m not rambling too much, there is a point to all this) if someone dies in a drunk driving accident, you can get involved in SADD or MADD or whatever. if your child dies in a gun accident you can get involved in gun control or something. stuff like that. losing someone in an accident like that isn�t any less tragic, but at least you can sort of channel your grief. but to me, losing dave is just like a dead end. it doesn�t make any sense. it�s hard to know where to go from here.
when i�m upset, i tend to make mixes. and after dave died, i wanted to make a mix of dave�s favorite songs but i didn�t know what they were. and the only bands of his that i really listen to are the pilfers and avoid one thing. and i was just thinking, for what it�s worth, maybe i�d pass the idea on to someone who might be able to do something with it (assuming someone wants to). but i was thinking of a compilation of either material dave played on or songs he really loved, and the proceeds go to some charity. i think it would be a nice memorial to him.
that�s all. i wish there was some way i could meaningfully express my condolances to everyone who was close to him....but i just dont know what to say. i�m sorry.
becca
Hi,
I don�t know who will read this, but my name is John. I would like to express my heartfelt sympathies to Dave�s friends and family. I can�t even imagine what you are going through and how you are getting through it.
It met Dave two, no three times in my life. The first was at an now defunct club called Phantasmagoria in a Maryland suburb of Wheaton (outside Washington DC). I was one of 4-500 kids there to see SHJ and the Pilfers. Needless to say both bands were amazing. I had seen SHJ at the 9:30 club in Washington a year or two before that. Afterwards eveyone in the band was nice to me, saying �Hi� when I said hi, but Dave was the one who took a moment to let me tell him about the band that I was in at college. Here he is with friends and bandmates doing other things that I�m sure were much more fun, and he�s letting me, a kid he�s never met before, tell him about my band. He even pulled Rick (the bassist) over at one point to hear what I was saying. At the end he gave me their agent�s (at the time) phone number so I could try and set up a show at my college. I went home and told all my friends and called my bandmates to tell them of how cool the drummer from SHJ was to me.
Well, in early Nov. of 1999 my band finally got to play with SHJ at a place called the Haunt in Ithaca, NY. We got there before SHJ, and after they loaded their gear in, I told Dave about my previous meeting with him. His face lit up and he said that he remembered and that he was glad we finally were going to play together. I have no idea if he really remembered me, but if he didn�t he is the best actor in the world. He probably did remember me, atleast that�s how I choose to remember it.
The show went great, we all hung out for an hour or so afterwards. I think I saw one more show with them the following Spring in DC, but hung out more with Ron than Dave. It was always a blast to see Dave and those guys.
I don�t know if this means anything to anyone, but I felt compelled to write because, even in the few interactions I had with Dave, he made those hours at shows more fun and encouraged me to keep following my dreams. I just wanted to share that with you.
Sincerely,
John
Hello, this is Jay Adelberg. I was the drummer for a number of CT bands throughout the 1990�s and show promoter as well. I got to know Dave very well, Johnny Too Bad and The Strikeouts and Spring Heeled Jack must have played at least 20-25 shows together over the years. Dave was a great guy, always with a smile and a kind and encouraging word. SHJ often went out of their way to help my band (and many many others) out when they didn�t need to. That was the kind of band they were, and the kind of guy Dave was. I will miss him terribly, and will cherish all the great memories I have of him. I will keep him in my prayers.
Jay Adelberg
I was lucky enough to have met Dave on several occasions at SHJ shows through the years and have nothing but good things to say about the man. I think I speak for eveyone who ever met Dave or was ever into the New England punk/ska scene thahe will be sorely misssed.
Anonymous
Dave was a great drummer. May he rest in peace.
Will
we just wanted to send our deepest condolences to Dave�s family and friends and bandmates. we lost our drummer last year, and we know that no words right now can comfort the pain you all are going through. dave is in our prayers, as well as all of the avoid one thing family.
god bless,
inspection 12
I would just like to extend my deepest sympathy to the family and friends, Dave will be missed.
Sincerely yours,
Andrew F Perry