210602, 0613hr, central time

i've been busy, getting myself back on track. and i'm not doing too badly!

these days, i have a routine in my life. i wake up at 5am, i go to class at 9am, do my homework after class, and depending on which day it is, lab in the afternoon till 5pm. after which i get home, rest and try to work either on my japanese or my new website design. speaking of which, if anyone's interested, please go to the gbook and tell me what kind of background colors you want. dark or light? or if you think a new design will be a complete waste of time, because either 1) this design is already perfect [puahaha..] or 2) cindy the design idiot has already maxed out all her website design potential...

poachie and i are actively discussing my visit - i'm spending july 4th and that weekend in seattle/vancouver with her, and both of us are really excited. i can't wait to get out of this place, and see that old friend of mine. i've not seen her for almost a year now, and if i don't visit this time, it'll be another year because i see her again. how tragic is that! this summer, i "betrayed" my friends, for sneaking home for only three weeks, before most of them were back. of all my overseas friends minz is my only consolation, because at least we spent some quality time shopping for shoes and drinking non-wisma bubble tea.

ming is someone i really miss a lot. the fact is, we've not really been keeping in touch, or at least i hardly know anything about how she's doing, till recently. she's apparently still reading this journal religiously though, religious enough to have the illusion that we're "in touch." [*wave violently* hello woman!] i talked to her a few times on icq recently, the last conversation about smashing men's heads with sledgehammers, so all is good now. but it saddens me to know that she's already found a job in the UK [i mean, i am happy for her, but but but..] because that means she's not going to be there in singapore when i go back for good.

it's selfish of me to say this, isn't it? but i've always counted on my rgs friends to all go back to singapore after we finish with our studies, afterwhich we'll all be super career women who will miraculously still be able to find time for high tea together, or something like that. to me, it was okay, to meet up only once a year during summer vacation, because i had faith that we would be able to meet up more often than that once we're done with school anyway, this was supposed to just be a phase. i always assumed that we'd be together forever. i always felt that way.

quite like how i had the faith that we weren't going to get split up during the redistribution of students into different classes at the end of secondary 1. when we found out that we may end up in different classes in sec 2, the whole bunch of us went to the staffroom to find out the new arrangement, some of us were really nervous, because we childishly felt that our friendship would die if we went to different classes. me, i wasn't nervous at all, because i believed strongly in us, i believed that nothing would happen to us, that our bond was so strong fate will be on our side and we would be in the same class no matter what. and then my blind faith got completely shattered. i was so confident before we spoke to the teacher, but broke down completely after. such a silly girl, i was.

see what happens after that though? 9 years after that, we're still good friends. different classes, schools, even countries, all didn't kill the friendship off. arguments almost did, but distance was never a problem. maybe there're times we neglect keeping in touch, but the warm fuzzy feeling comes back once we start talking again.

yesterday, when she saw me on icq, ming went, "meow meow?" and "ruffled [my] mane". what? my lion's mane, because i'm leo. she's so adorable. i really love her very much.