250701, 1050hr, Singapore time.

really, that lotus paste bun is making me feel really sick. i don't know what's wrong either, i have no doubt that it's supposed to be quite tasty, but i just feel disgusted. i think it's too sweet for me. i feel quite puke-y after eating that. eew. miserable. ugh.

my brother was such a kid last night. i mean my elder brother, by the way. he had this sword with him, the one he got from commissioning from OCS [Office Cadet School] during NS. the one he sleeps with at night. and he kept on threatening to poke me with it. eek. he hit me [lightly] on the head, saying that he's trying to knight me. then he hit me on the shoulders, saying he's massaging me. argh. when cheryl called, i told her i was busy playing with my 5-year-old brother. hahaha...

i really wonder, i think he only does that to me. i can't imagine him being like that with his girlfriend, or any of his friends, actually. he talks soccer with my younger brother and my dad, he's obviously the filial son with my mom. he's a kid only with me! gasp. what does that say about me. nothing, I say, absolutely nothing. *glare*

anyhow, fyi, the astrophysics page is up, but the glossary isn't. the GLBT and AIDS/HIV page too, though the GLBT resource links aren't ready yet. I also have a rant page there, to rant specifically about GLBT issues or whatnot. kinda separate from this journal type of ranting. links page, and creation page up as well.

so there.

with that out of the way, i really need to continue on my work now. i mean the actual work i have. writing a paper on virtual museums. shit tired. and feeling sick. and just a teeny weeny little bit depressed about some stuff.

sigh. sometimes i feel like God has a perverse sense of humour [at different times, for different reasons.] this time, i know He's having fun watching me get all confused and upset for one minute, then all excited and happy the next. and on and on and on and on.

sicko, You.

[ later ]

another one of His sick jokes, i'd bet. after spending so much of my time now on this stupid museum paper. after reading notes till my eyes were popping into outer space. after trying desperately to write this paper the way i believe it's supposed to be written, which includes reading other officers' papers to get a sense of style and formatting. i was just informed by a colleague that my paper is likely to just be read, incorporated, or maybe only used as a reference by this other officer who's also writing on this topic. apparently, this is his project, he's likely to actually just want my help, as opposed to having me write one complete paper on my own. or maybe he really just wanted me to waste my time, that's all. blardy hell.

if they had told me this earlier, i would have been super delighted. i would have been really glad, cos i wouldn't have felt so stressed up, i would have been able to avoid a lot of trouble. but not now, you fucking idiots. not after i've already done so much. gone through so much stress. OT-ed so much. why the shit are you bullying the intern?!

am i still going to have to complete my paper? yes. why? because actually nobody knows for sure. not even my boss. cos this officer who's in charge of this project isn't around, gone for a vacation or something. he's not even here during regular office hours anyway, cos he's on this flexible work plan or something, he can choose to work away from the office, and of course he does. i don't even have a fucking idea what he looks like.

i'm majorly pissed off. grrrrr.