| 1115h
Mood: wondering how come I'm still fine Happiness of the day: No ece 340 class today Event of the week: shaun's bday today. I can't believe this. I seriously have very bad luck these days. The weekend that's just past, my friends and I drove up to wisconsin, to visit the ssa there. Sort of a pilot exchange program we're trying to do. Out of the 5 cars that drove up, 3 cars skidded off the highway. Including the one I was in.
The car I was in, was the least affected, in the sense we really only just skidded into the ditch, got stuck there and had to abandon the car and have the police bring us to the next highway exit. That's all. The other 2 cars were worse off. One hit a truck, a guy got hit in the face by the airbag. The other one, skidded into the ditch and flipped over. All the glass windows, windscreen are shattered, and the car was quite badly wrecked. So it had to be scrapped. The guy who didn't wear a seatbelt had a bump on his head.
Maybe I should say I am actually lucky, instead of unlucky, that nothing really really serious happened. My parents don't even know that I was driving up to wisconsin because I didn't have time to call them. I was going to call them from wisconsin, to let them know. But after the horrendous night, I just couldn't. I wouldn't know what to tell them. Should I tell them that we drove? Should I lie and said it was a smooth drive up? Should I say everyone is fine? So till now, they don't know anything, and I'm feeling so guilty.
Fact is, I was totally calm during the skid itself [we spinned for about 2 rounds, before we ended up facing the traffic. The first thing that came to my mind was, "Wow, so many lights coming our way."] Even after the skid, I was really just thinking about getting out of the ditch, and wondering if the wisconsin people are gonna get pissed waiting for us to arrive. But, after that, when I saw the guy's injured face, another guy's crestfallen face for his wrecked car and so on, I was wondering what could have happened.
What if while we were stuck in the ditch, another car skidded and hit us? What if I was actually in the car that flipped over and some of the glass actually cut me? What if our car actually skidded and hit some other car? So many things could have happened, I might have not been able to make it to wisconsin in one piece. Man, I was lucky that except for some frozen fingers digging the snow, I was perfectly fine.
The situation could have been so easily worse, and my parents would never forgive me for going up to wisconsin. A whole bunch of people will never understand how come I suddenly stopped emailing. My friends will never know how much I love them. My goodness. Things just felt too near for my comfort.
Maybe I'm making a big fuss out of nothing. The people around me don't even know what I am kinda shaken, especially since I was the one taking care of people after they got injured, I cracked jokes to cheer people up while we were waiting for the wisconsin people to come pick us up. Even in Wisconsin, I had so much fun, getting drunk, getting to know the people there and generally acting like everything is fine, I guess it just doesn't seem like the skid affected me at all.
When I finally got back to my room [a few hours after I arrive back in illinois, btw, cos I had to go to work almost immediately after I arrived.] A few of my friends are online, and I felt so much better talking to Agnes about it. The uiuc people knew what happened. They all know that I wasn't injured, but one of them still bothered to ask me, "Are you ok?" I was almost going to cry, and say, "no, not really," but I didn't because I thought I probably I shouldn't show my vulnerability to him. As compared to the people who are actually injured, or are going to suffer financial losses, I am the lucky one. If I talk about it any further, it will seem like I'm trying to draw sympathy to myself. So I didn't say anything to him. Instead, we quickly shifted the conversation away from whatever that happened. But I'm still thankful, because I know at least he understood the gravity of the situation, and he cared.
I really should call home. But what should I say?
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