My depression is definitely gone now. Bad things have happened, but I will not think about them unnecessarily.

Pochin asked me whether I think she's a happy person or an unhappy person. The answer is of course unimportant here, but I wonder the same thing about myself. Am I a happy or unhappy person?

I'm thinking probably the people who read this journal of mine will think that that I'm an unhappy person. A person constantly plagued by loneliness, worries and stress. I get worried about myself reading my own journal entries, wondering when I will eventually break down or something. Hehe. But really, I'm not as psychotic as I seem to be.

Shaun thinks that I'm scarily depressed sometimes. Well, it just turns out he happens to be around when I'm depressed and he sees the ugliest side of it all when I start snapping at him. It's probably unfortunate that he has to be the one to witness me trashing my self-esteem somtimes, but maybe it's better than way too...but I digress.

Anyway, except my best friends who I actually constantly whine to, and of course the guy, I'm pretty sure the rest of the world's gonna think that I'm actually a happy person. I laugh easily, I smile at strangers, I take friendly verbal punches very well and I'm not afraid to act as a child and just have fun. Yes, I would think I make a pretty good example of a naturally happy person. But am I really?

Two such contrasting faces, both of me. Which is the right one? I don't know myself. Probably they're both real...probably I should keep track of the frequency of appearance of either and then make a final conclusion of whether I'm a net happy or unhappy person....it's not that it's really that important, but I really wonder.....

I've finally done up a page to describe a few of the friends I have here at uiuc. Take a look..