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#2:
Once, I sat on a cat.
He called me a rat.
I told him: "If that were right, you would have won this fight, so your point is trite."
That's when he proved me wrong and I died.
#3:
People with control issues tend to fold laundry because it gives very precise wrinkles.
#4:
This is a test, it is only a test
Had it been an actual assignment
It would not have been done.
#5:
When I saw her, I got a crush
When I heard her speak, I became infatuated
When she spoke to me, I fell in love
Holy cow, she knows who I am?
#6:
No one ever told me the secrets of the universe...
I just make them up as I go along.
#7:
If I were writing the Bible, I would have my name changed.
I mean, who's gonna believe a guy named Ezekial?
#8:
Read one thing a day that offends you, and one thing a day that makes you think.
You'll be suprised how often you only need to read one thing a day.
#9:
When I sat down to write poetry, all that came out was comedy.
Oh well, I'd rather be happy than pretty.
#10:
I beat a kid up once, and the best part is,
he forgave me before I did.
His Quotes...
"What's Steve on today?" -Omny's mom
"Jesus." Omny
"Cmon mouse, do it for the victims of September 11."
"That's cause I'm ambi-yum-strous!"
*Omny leaves because he didn't do homework*
"What, you're a loser too?" ---- Teacher (kidding, not mean)
"It took you this long to figure THAT out?!?"
---- In Calc
Jorgy- "Don't put that!!"
Omny- "Ok" *Types something* *Dstln and Omny laugh*
Jorgy- "What??"
*Omny typed, "Here is the not porn you wanted."*
Jorgy- "Forget Omny, he's a lost cause."
Me- "But he's in front of you!"
Omny- "Heil T!!"
Girl in class- "What wrong with you people??
���Where do you come up with this stuff?? Do you pull it out of your ass??"
Omny- The depths of our brains know no bounds.
���I suggest you be quite lest we eat your brains."
(While playing T-Tic T-Tac Toe)
*Takes paper* *Writes something* *Gives back to Dstln*
"Crap! I forgot to cheat!"
*THWAK*, laughs, "Oh, God, I'm in so much pain"
Continues laughing uncontrollably for the next eight minutes.
(runs full speed into door that should have been open)
"If you think I'm sectionalist, and you want my territory, come on baby let me know."
"Meat Is Murder, I Would Kill For A Bean Buretto"
"Get me the Swazi-phone!! (As president)
(Covered, covered and smothered, double covered and smothered.
---- Denny's menu)
"Oh no!! I lost my smothering!!"
"The saddest thing would be to live in a world without the letter 's" because Nixon's dog would be called "Checker" and you can't play with just one."
"So you can use that with subtractables too?"
Book-Politicians waffle out of calculation.
"So they use syrup of truth?"
"Hey, you even spelled it right."
"Nooooo, why have you forsaken me!!!"
*scribble scribble scribble, rewrite incorrectly*
�����---- Me and Omny, in that order
"See, you just go like this-'Goosh'"
"What're you talking about?! You can't do that!!"
"Sure you can, it's the goosh. They do right there in the book."
"Ohhh..."
�����---- Me and Omny, in that order
"And this...is super circle!!!!!"
(Me and Omny laugh uncontrollably)
�����---- Me and Omny
"Oh-you can't stand here"
"Can we jog in place?" *begins to jog*
�����---- At baseball game
What's this flag signify?
"The US during the Depression when we couldn't afford all 50 stars."
"What're you doing?!?"
"Drawing trapezoids. Calc chapter 1."
"How about Political Sciences chapter 1??"
"Ohhh...well be more specific."
�����---- Conversation between a sub and Omny
*Voice on loudspeaker* "Could (Jorgy) please come down to the office??"
Omny-"He didn't do it!!!!!!!"
Teacher-"Never do that again!"
�����---- Poli Sci