Rituals - Part 1 by Maaya
Standard disclaimers apply
Heero POV
Peering out of the window, I felt a wave of depression come tumbling
towards me as if it had wanted to come to me and to me only. At the
thought, I snorted, but couldn’t shake out of the uncomfortable
cold feeling I was completely soaked in. It was still dark outside
as the sun hadn’t begun to rise just yet and mist surrounded
‘Wing where we were placed, hidden in the depths of the forest.
I knew that the other gundams were around me in carefully planned
positions but it was impossible for me to spot them as they were all
behind me, and I couldn’t move ‘Wing as it could endanger
our cover. This was our first mission together, all five of us, and
it was also the one we were ending our stay at the school with.
I can’t say that our stay together were very informative in
the other pilots’ skills, traits or goals, but it was a beginning
of what Dr. J was probably planning: to know as much as possible about
each other. It was necessary, he told me through a mail, especially
in critical situations where you had to act on emotions and gut feelings,
not simple knowledge or logic.
Such as captures, hostages and savings.
It’s extremely important to know, or at least have an idea
about how your team mate is going to react in situations like that.
Letting my eyes flick over to the small digital numbers in the control
panel’s left side, I read that the clock was 03:42. I had another
half an hour left before I should prepare myself for the attack.
Clicking the COM link in function, I spoke out loud to my team mates,
almost jumping to the sound of my own voice as it sounded calmer but
louder than expected.
“Half an hour left until preparations start.”
“Confirmed.” It was only Winner who bothered to answer
me with a real word, the others settled with grunts or ‘aaa’s.
Well, everyone but Maxwell that will say.
“Yeah, sure, okay, got it..”
He did probably rattle on, finding more words for ‘yes’
than most people probably could probably ever think of, but I closed
the link before I could hear anything else.
I leaned back in my seat, unable to relax, as I thought about what
I had learnt about my fellow pilots.
Chang is a loner, and I pity him since he had to share a room with
Maxwell. I guess that there was quite a personality crash between
the two of them. He is also smart but ignorant, I have a feeling that
you have to be a really good friend of his to make him care enough
to help you, warn you and so on. He sees the world in two shades and
those are black and grey. For him there is justice and bias, in whereas
he fights for justice.
Barton and I had shared a room for four weeks but he is still the
one I knew the least about. He is a soldier, plain and simple, and
I doubt that he has ever been anything else. I’d guess that
in a way he is rather like me, emotionally and otherwise. He cares
about the mission first and foremost, but can also care about people
though it’s hard to come through his shell and make him care
for one.
Winner is strategic, honest, polite, wealthy and logical, though
also considerate and caring. He does also know a great lot about emotions
after having that ‘space heart’. I’m skeptical about
it all, but he *did* actually feel what Maxwell was feeling during
that time, so I can only assume and hope that it wasn’t a lucky
shot..
Maxwell. I’m still wondering about how he managed to get into
that situation he was in, it’s obvious that he was scared –
no, more than scared, when we found him. He was close to terrified.
I’m also curious about why he didn’t fight back –
that teacher was a lot weaker than any OZ soldier and still, he was
too scared to fight. It makes me wonder sometimes.
I know that he is a thief, and a break in-expert, and that makes
me wonder too. At the first sight of him you’d think that he
was a normal teenager whose only worries were acne and girlfriends
until he somehow managed to fall into G’s hands and became a
gundam pilot.
It’s absurd, I know, but admit that you’d think that
too.
A sudden beeping sound hauled me out of my thoughts and my eyes flew
to the digital clock once again. The red numbers were blinking wildly
and I reached out to press the button to make the annoying sound stop.
When that was done and over with, I moved my hand slightly to the
right to push the COM link into working.
“This is 01 – Start preparations; mission start in fifteen
minutes. Keep COM links ‘on’ from now on.”
“03 – Yes.”
“05 – Understood.”
“04 – Confirmed.”
There was a pause before Maxwell decided to answer, sounding far
more enthusiastic than was normal. Did he always have to make himself
stand out?
“02 – Got it!” I could tell from just his voice
that he was grinning.
There was a complete silence again, which I used to check everything.
Ammo, shields and weapons – everything was clear. I felt how
my adrenaline began to run fast in my veins as I looked at the clock
once again, the red numbers indicated that it was time to go. Trying
to keep from grinning that grin that people said was ‘freaky’,
I gripped the controls; they felt perfect – familiar and well
shaped in my hands.
“Go.” I said simply, knowing that the smirk on my lips
was heard in my voice. I hope it didn’t freak them out *too*
much.
Suddenly, Sandrock was visible to my right and Heavyarms to my left
as we broke out of the forest just in time too catch the first glint
of the train caravan freighting mobile suits. Just like we had figured,
the rail was guarded by even more suits and I saw how Barton raised
his gun to load off some ammo into them. Just as I was about to do
the same, Deathscythe was in front of me and swung its scythe in a
deadly half circle, taking out two mobile suits at the same time.
“Anyone who sees me goes to HELL!” He screamed out loud,
seemingly forgetting about our COM link as he swung the scythe once
again. I resisted the urge to roll my eyes as I needed them to focus
on the battle; it was just so.. so Maxwell, to scream like that during
battle. I heard a soft snort, though, from.. someone, presumably Barton,
before I had the chance to take out *my* first mobile suit.
I blasted it in two and it exploded. It was clean, and the only thing
that showed that there was a pilot in the suit was the short scream
that had time to escape his lips before the explosion.
It’s the screams that get to me the most though.
I destroyed another suit; this one didn’t even have time to
react before it exploded.
Under the loud battle sounds, a mix of explosions, screams and that
special ringing in you ears, I could suddenly hear a voice speaking
calm enough to make itself heard through the noise.
“I’m.. sorry.”
It took a while before I realized that it was Quatre who had spoken
and I turned around quickly, in time to see Sandrock destroy another
mobile suit.
“I’m so.. sorry.”
Another suit exploded.
“Please forgive me.”
Yet another explosion, coloring the faint mist red, orange and yellow,
the colors of a sunrise that never seemed to come.
*******
I shivered, forcing myself to ignore everything around me but the
doll that I was currently fighting.. destroying. Thankfully, Winner
kept quiet from now on, but well, as they say; from the frying pan
into the fire. Isn’t it something like that?
“I’m going to kill YOUUUU!”
There was another flash from the green scythe before it swung around
once again.
“Maxwell, keep quiet!”
Shen Long’s arm shot out towards the train as it passed him,
successfully destroying one of the rail road cars.
“Shinigami has come to you..!”
Deathscythe flung himself towards the train, cutting off half of
the wagons with the scythe. He used another swing to blow them into
something near to nothing.
“05 to 02 - shut up!”
I couldn’t help it, but I started laughing now. Not at Chang
and Maxwell, no, I was laughing because of the adrenaline, because
of the fear combined with excitement and it gave me this strange feeling
of something I couldn’t escape. So I laughed. Simple as that.
“Fuck! Heero, what are you doing?!”
It was Maxwell, and he sounded almost.. panicked? scared? He was
speaking English, forgetting himself in the heat of the battle and
I snapped out of it, at the sound if his voice and the power of an
explosion that rocked me in the cockpit. “Damn!”
“Heero? Are you all right?”
I grunted an affirmative answer and tested ‘Wing’s controls
again, after having lost grip of them. They were working all right,
but the left arm felt.. strange somehow. As I didn’t have time
to reflect about it right now, I went out into the battle again.
*******
Yet another explosion was heard as Shen Long destroyed yet another
mobile suit. Thankfully it was empty, fresh out from the destroyed
train that was now lying on the side, twisted once in an unnatural
way. I could hear the heavy breaths coming from my team mates as they
tried to keep from toppling over in pure exhaustion, and knew that
I wasn’t much better myself.
“This is 01 – Status?”
“03 – Clear.”
“05 – Okay.”
“02 – Umm, kinda good.”
“04 – I’ll be okay.”
I raised one of my eyebrows. ‘I’ll be okay’ didn’t
sound quite right – what had happened to Winner? I pushed it
away for now – right now we had to disappear before more OZ
soldiers came and could track us. We were going to a safe house, hidden
in this very forest and were supposed to stay there until our next
orders arrived. I said that to the others too, but was interrupted
as Trowa spoke up.
“Quatre, how are you really?”
“I told you – I’ll be okay.”
“Quatre.”
There was a pause in which I thought about what they had said. I
had noticed that Winner, Barton and Maxwell were calling each other
by their first names now, and had done that the latest days.
“Broken, or bruised ribs, that’s all.”
“Hey guys, as much as I hate to interrupt your conversation,
shouldn’t we head to the safe house now?” Maxwell’s
voice broke into their conversation and maybe it was just me, but
I thought his voice sounded strained somehow. It was probably just
my imagination though.
“You should use code numbers while talking in the COM link.”
I informed them, sharper than necessary. “We’re heading
back now. Winner, be careful with those ribs.”
“04 – Yes.”
“02 – Uhh, Heero?”
“Yes?”
“02 – Why aren’t *you* using the code numbers?”
I really, desperately wanted to kill him as he had said that, and
right after that, kill myself. Not knowing what to answer, I ignored
him and took the lead towards the safe house.
It didn’t take very long for us to arrive to the safe house,
and when ‘Wing and I was settled, I leaned back in my seat,
closing my eyes and allowing myself to relax for a moment. I sat like
that for a few seconds before reaching out with a tired hand and shutting
the COM link off. Another moment later, I reached out and opened the
hatch, and forced myself to get out of my gundam.
The first thing I saw was.. well.. trees and four gundams facing
mine as we all stood in a circle. I knew that there should be a small
cabin somewhere around here, but wasn’t really sure where.
Chang and Barton were already outside their gundams, climbing down
towards the ground, whilst Winner stood on his open hatch, clutching
his stomach area with a resolute but pale expression in his face.
Maxwell was making his way towards him.
As I was sure that he would help Winner down, I began climbing myself
and it wasn’t long before I was standing on real, solid ground.
Vaguely, I remembered an old cartoon I’d seen in a shop window,
where the character was kissing the ground after being on a flying
object for a long time. I snorted softly at the thought and waited
until Maxwell and Winner had reached the ground too.
Of course I could have gone without them but I figured that if I
should get to know them as well as possible, I might as well start
now.
“Hey, Heero! Are you waiting for nice lil’ us? Can you
help Quatre a bit, do you think?” Maxwell waved to me, and I
was surprised to hear that he asked for help. Didn’t take him
for the type to do that, though I’d be even more surprised if
it had been Wufei or Trowa.
Winner protested weakly. “Duo, I’m fine you know, only
some broken ribs..”
“Yup, and we’re gonna get them wrapped up as soon as
possible.”
Somehow I couldn’t help but feeling slightly amused by their
friendly argument. It was like they really knew each other quite well,
as if they were brothers or something like that. Maxwell turned towards
me, and for the first time, I noticed some dark bags under his eyes
and the tiredness in them. He was pale too, and I wondered if he really
was as fine as he’d said he was.
“Where is the safe house?”
“Follow Chang and Barton. They should have found it by now.”
“Cool.” He grinned, but I was unsure about exactly *what*
he thought was cool so I ignored the statement. Instead, I put an
arm under Winner’s.. Quatre’s to support him, bringing
some weight away from Duo. They both smiled weakly towards me.
We walked on in a slow pace, all three of us was very quiet, even
Maxwell – no Duo. I should learn to call them by their first
names I guess, as they do with me already.
Even now, as the sun had risen, it was grey outside. Totally grey
and cloudy in a depressing way. It was still though, no wind was blowing
even the slightest and that made it really quiet and calm. Not a single
sound was heard more than the creaking of dry twigs lying on the ground
around us. I spotted a lonely, yellow leaf as it fell from a tree,
landing only meters away from us.
It wasn’t until we could see the safe house that I noticed
something.. different in Duo’s way of walking. He stepped very
quickly on his left leg and took long ones with his right, making
him sway up and down in a way that could only be described as he was
limping. Quatre didn’t seem to notice.
We had reached the cabin now, and for some reason so stood Chang..
Wufei and
Trowa outside, waiting for us, there was something sheepish about
their expressions. Duo seemed to notice it too, because he looked
at them both, questioning.
Wufei was the one who spoke up, and he looked directly at Duo as
he did. “Uhh, do you have your skeleton keys here?”
I had been right, there *was* something sheepish with that expression,
as well as in his voice too.
“Why?” Duo asked.
“The cabin is locked and we don’t have the keys.”
My braided team mate was suddenly grinning widely, giving Wufei with
a pointing look. “See, I told you we’d need them sometime!”
I didn’t even want to know.
He began digging in his braid, but before anyone of us had the chance
to ask about it, he took out a small tool. Quatre gasped and Trowa
snorted softly before he went to work, it only took him a few seconds
to do it. He was grinning even wider as the door swung open and he
held out a hand as if to show us that we should enter first. We did,
and he followed close after.
“Am I good, or what?”
After a quick ransack, we could see that there was three bedrooms,
so four of us would have to share with another. Given from the glares
Wufei gave us, I guessed that he wanted to be the one to have the
single room and we shrugged, accepting his wish.
He left us four standing, looking at each other, uncertain. As no
one of us seemed to want to make a decision, I spoke up on a sudden
impulse.
“I can share with Duo.”
I found myself suddenly in the center of all attention as everyone
seemed to stare at me as if I was an alien. Duo himself looked the
most surprised and for some reason it annoyed me that they were this
confused by that single decision..
“You really want that?” He asked, sounding both hopeful
and skeptical as he studied me, looking at me up and down.
“Why not?”
“Okayyy.” He visibly brightened. “Can we take the
room to the left?”
Shrugging, I repeated. “Why not?”
*******
I woke up sometime after midnight, but at first I wasn’t sure
why, I didn’t even know where I was. The only thing I knew was
that I was lying in a rather hard bed, and that it was completely
dark in the room.
What had happened?
Was I captured?
Had OZ..?
No I told myself, forcing myself to calm my breaths as I relaxed
back into my pillow, no. We had left the school and carried out a
mission, before going to a safe house in the middle of the woods.
The woods. I thought about it for a while – maybe *that* was
why I had woken up. It was entirely too quiet here, and dark. The
last time I had been in a forest was when I was young, still training
together with Odin.
Now with the memories of Odin in my mind, I relaxed again, though
I didn’t seem to be able to fall asleep. I could hear Duo’s
faint breaths in the bed beside mine and they could almost.. almost
lull me to sleep again..
Breathing in..
Pause
Breathing out..
Pause
In..
Pause.
Out..
In..
Out..
I blinked awake again as his breaths became quicker and quicker,
not having realized that I had breathed in the same rate as he had.
I frowned at the much too fast pace he had now, and it only seemed
too go faster and faster until..
After a specially heated inhale of air, the breaths stopped completely
and I could almost imagine how his eyes had opened and was now staring
up in the blackness surrounding him as well as it did with me. It
had been a nightmare.
I lay there, listening as he seemed to calm down, before getting
up, tumbling over his own bed, manage to make it out of the door,
and close it behind him.Then there was quiet again.
*******
TBC
*******