Dream On - Epilogue by Maaya
Standard disclaimers apply
Relena POV
I never liked him much, and you can't blame me - can you?
He was so happy and spirited, and I was jealous because of that. He
wasn't rich, and he didn't have a great family, at least not from what
I had heard. Still, he was much happier than me. I'm rich, I have a
loving family and lots of friends, but still I wasn't happy. At first,
I didn't know that he was together with Heero.
Heero. Of course, I had to fall in love with Heero. He was so different,
so unique, that I fell for him. Hard.
Every time he came into the room I was in, I felt giddy, like if I was
a ten-year-old girl again. I wanted to please him, to make him see me.
At the time, I never thought very much about Duo.
I don't know what I believed, but I never thought they really loved
each other. I thought that they could handle breaking up. I was so childish,
I never realized that other people could be hurt they way I could be.
Then Heero started to talk with me, and then we dated. He was childish
in a way, but also very grown up - I can't really explain it. He made
me grow up, he made me accept life. He made me think about life, and
the meaning of it. When I realized how much Heero meant for me, I also
realized how much I had hurt Duo.
I asked Heero about him, about how he was and how he had reacted when
they broke up.
I got upset when Heero said that he didn't know. He had left a note
in Duo's locker, and then never spoke to him again. I was close to actually
slap him, but I managed to calm down. He looked so sad, and he told
me that he was scared. He said that he wasn't ready to talk to him yet.
I don't know what it was that happened, but Heero stopped speaking with
everyone he knew back then. They just lost contact with each other,
it seemed. I think they were angry, because he left Duo. I guess they
had a right to be so. Heero got new friends when he was together with
me and he seemed to like my brother Milliardo, because they were together
rather often.
I forgot about Duo for a while, until I saw him 'black out' in school.
Somehow, it scared me because it wasn't Duo anymore. It was another
person; a very thin, unattractive and unhappy person. I ran to Heero
and told him, no, I 'ordered' him to speak with Duo. To my surprise,
he agreed.
Later that day, when Heero and I were..uh..skipping class, we saw Duo
walking towards us. It was cold, and he didn't even wear a jacket! I
gave Heero a cold glare (I learnt it from him) but he didn't say anything
before Duo was past us. He asked where Duo's jacket was, and Duo just
snapped as an answer.
Heero stood still, unsure and surprised. Then he turned to look at me.
I understood what he was asking and I shrugged before turning around
and walking down the street, alone.
I don't know what they talked about, but Heero seemed happier. It was
like a heavy stone had fallen from his heart and now it was much easier.
The next day, we heard about it. Duo Maxwell, former jester of the school,
had killed himself. I was so shocked, I think I went hysteric. I shouted
at Heero, I asked him what he had said to him earlier. I even said that
it was his fault, but I knew it was partly mine too. Something in my
heart told me that it was Duo's too, but I didn't want to listen. I
couldn't be Duo's fault because Duo was dead!
The days were in turmoil; full of angst, sadness, confusion and anger.
I felt so guilty.
I was guilty.
I didn't speak with Heero for some days, but when I finally did, he
scared me. He cried. He just broke down and cried. I soothed him, rubbed
his back and told him to let it all out. But I never said that everything
was all right.
We went to the burial together, but somewhere in the masses of crying,
people had disappeared. I felt lonely and out of place. I ran into Duo's
friend, Wufei. He was so angry and upset, but I saw that he hadn't cried.
He hadn't cried yet.
I asked him why and he told me that Duo had said that boys shouldn't
cry. I said that it was stupid and that Heero had cried. He seemed shocked
when he'd heard that, but then he said that it was all mine and Heero's
fault.
I couldn't help it; I really wanted to show that I was strong enough
to bear it.
But I cried.
*******
The End
*******
Back to Dream
On
Back
to Maaya's Fan Fictions
Back to Fan
Fiction Index
