Oprah: �Please welcome back to the show Spike, formerly known as William the Bloody, and Buffy Summers. Also with us today are Druscilla and Harmony.
Today�s topic: Spike and the women he loves.
Spike, would you like to start us off?� Spike: � Sure, just cause I�m a vampire doesn�t mean I don�t have feelings too! I can love just as well as the next bloke. But Buffy here doesn�t believe me. Look at Dru, I loved her for over a hundred years!�
Druscilla: �He�s right, vampires can love. I loved him. And he went and tried to stake me�naughty wicked Spike.� *Dru growls lowly at Spike*
Oprah: � What about Harmony? Did you love her?�
Harmony: � Yeah! What about Harmony, Spike!? I gave you the best�bunch of months of my life! What went wrong, Blondie Bear? *Spike rolls his eyes*
Spike: � Harm, it was fun while it lasted but its time to move on now.� Oprah: � So were you just using Harmony?�
Buffy: � You sound surprised. He�s a heartless demon, what did you expect?� Spike: � Bloody hell! I am not!� Oprah: � Spike have you tried to show Buffy your true feelings?�
Spike: � Yes, but she pushed me away. But I�m still determined to win her heart. I�ll save the whole bloody world if I have to!� Druscilla: � My poor William, you are so lost. The stars cry but you do not see them. They weep so�can�t you hear?�
*Buffy throws her hands up in frustration* Buffy: � Spike, you will never win me. I will never be with you. You disgust me. Understand!� *Spike gets a look of deep hurt then gets angry, gets up and throws his chair across the room*
*Oprah grabs his arm* Oprah: � Calm down. You just need to get to know yourself, and everything will be fine!�
*Spike vamps out* Spike: � Are you bloody insane!? And didn�t I kill you once already?�
Buffy: � Um�yeah I kind of remember that too...why isn�t she dead?� *Everyone is confused except for Druscilla who is rambling insanely*
Oprah: � I guess there�s no more concealing it�� *Oprah turns around and when she turns back her face is demonic and monstrous * �I�m a vengeance demon�
*Spin around to the camera guys, whose mouths are hanging open* Camera Guy #1: � Cut to commercial?� Camera Guy #2: � The would probably be a good idea.� *The screen goes black*
By Vamp Harmony.