Can't Diet!
Hands up; how many of us truly hate those who say things like, "I can eat anything I want and I don’t gain an ounce? Wow. That’s a lot of hands. I hate you, too. In my whiniest voice, I am now saying, "That’s not fair!!!!!" All my life, I have had to battle with my weight, and I’m sorry to say, it’s a battle I can’t win. I want to be thin, I really do, but the sacrifice is too hard, and makes me too miserable. Losing weight is easy. Keeping it off, is a bitch! Six years ago, I went on a serious diet, and lost over six stone, but sadly, since I came off my diet, over three stone has gone back on. I keep going back on a diet, but when I start feeling miserable, and deprived, I ask myself why am I bothering? and then tell myself that it’s just not worth it. In a few weeks, I’ll probably start another diet, lose a bit of weight, and then lose heart. For now, I’m saying, "take me, or leave me, but this is who I am!" If this story sounds familiar to you, why not tell me about it, and I’ll write a poem for you about your experience of dieting.
Can’t
Diet!
By Amanda Jay Clark.
I’m
back on a diet, but losing the fight.
I need two-thousand calories in every bite.
Throw out the lettuce, bring on the cheese,
To salad I say, no, to burgers, yes please.
I need a steak, not a boiled fish,
With hundreds of chips piled high on the dish.
I want a cream cake piled high with jam,
I want mashed potatoes with minty lamb.
Cabbage is smelly, carrots are dull,
Sprouts are boring and don’t make me full.
I want proper butter, not low fat spread.
I want it spread on as thick as the bread.
I love full fat milk and sugary sweets,
Short crust pastry and fatty meats.
I need fried bacon and curry and rice,
I need a good chilli laced with spice.
I can’t resist peanuts, or beef flavoured crisps,
Then licking the salt from my salty lips.
I crave for chocolate with caramel filling.
I want to lose weight, but I don’t seem willing,
To give up foods that are exciting to bite,
And tickle my palate with such delight.
I’ve padlocked the fridge, and thrown food away,
Then gone and brought more the very next day.
I could pull out my teeth, tie my jaw up with wire,
But I’d still find a way to eat what I desire.
I want to be skinny, I want to be thin,
I know that stout’s ugly, obese is a sin.
I won’t make a model or be wanted by men,
Or be able to look forward to the day when,
I can wear a bikini on a sun kissed beach,
And being beautiful is way out of reach.
But without the willpower, I’ll have to stay fat.
Can’t diet. I like my food too much for that!
Can’t Diet, is protected by copyright, and remains the property of the author, Amanda Jay Clark.
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