| " So, Spike is in here? ", Giles said holding the necklace in his hand as Buffy sat on the chair in front of him and she nodded. Spike was outside, walking in the morning sunlight through one of the many gardens out back, as she watched him from the window and smiled. " Just his memory. What I want to know is how do we get it out and into Spike's head. ". " Do you really want that? ". " I can't protect him if he's in two places. ". " Protect him!? From what? ". " Angel. He wants Spike for some reason and I'll be dead first before he does! ". " Buffy!? Be reasonable! ". " Don't start that again! Spike is not a vampire any more! He isn't dangerous! He's human! ", Buffy said as she stood up and Giles walked closer. " Buffy . Are you willing to forget everything he's done just because he breathes? Because his heart's beating again? He is still Spike! ". Buffy grabbed the necklace out of Giles hand as she stormed out of the room and slammed the door behind her. Giles sighed as he wiped his glasses off and felt the tears in his eyes. He looked out of the window when he looked at Spike and Dawn and Spike was trying to get away from her so she couldn''t put flowers in his hair. " Why couldn't you have stayed dead. ". ------------------------------------------------------------------- Willow looked at the amulet when she handed it back to Buffy and Buffy looked at her. " I talked to Andrommi and she said that it had to be Spike's choice if he wanted to remember. ". " But how does he do that? ". " He just has to put the necklace back on. ". " But what if it's too much for him and he has a seizure? ". " Then let him decide how much he wants to remember at one time. ". " Ok. ". " Buffy? ". " What? ". " Are you sure about this? He seems fine the way he is. ". " He deserves to know. ". " What if doesn't want to know? ". " Then I have to figure out how to protect both of him. ". --------------------------------------------------------------------- --------- ------------- Spike laid on his back under the covers as Buffy sat on his stomach and he wiggled a bit under her. She giggled as he smiled and she brushed her fingers along his chest. " So, you're saying that my memories are somehow in that? ", Spike asked as he looked at the amulet in Buffy's hand and she nodded. " All you have to do is put it on and you'll remember everything. ". " Would you like that? ". " It's not my choice. It's yours. You don't have to learn everything in one night. Just take your time. ". Spike thought when he noticed that the amulet was sparkling and he sighed. Buffy watched as he took the necklace and placed it around his neck. He placed the amulet against him, near his heart, when it felt like he was hit in the head and he started shaking. " Spike!? Stop! Let go! ", Buffy said when she tried to take his hand off the amulet and foam came from his mouth. She watched him when he let go and she wiped his mouth. He looked at her when he took the necklace off, gently pushed her off, got out of bed, and crawled into a corner. She looked at him as he shook and his eyes darted around the room. She got off the bed when she crawled to him and he looked like he was going to cry. " Don't tell! Don't tell! William is a good boy! ", he said as he curled into a ball on the floor and she looked at him. " Not again. ", Buffy whispered when she touched his hair and he jumped. He looked at her when he reached for her and Buffy held him. She rocked him when he sniffed then cried and she kissed his hair. " What happened? ". " Don't tell. Be a good boy and don't tell. Don't tell Daddy about the game. ". " What are you talking about!? ". " William be Mommy's good boy and don't tell Daddy. It's our game! ". " What game? ". " Touchie game. Don't tell Daddy! Daddy be mad! ". Buffy thought when he placed his hands between his legs and whimpered in her ear. " Ohhhhhhhhhhhh shit! ", Buffy said when she realized what happened to him and he sniffed and was shaking. She went to get his medication but he didn't want to take it and she told him that it was all right. He took it as she brushed the hair from his eyes and he blinked. " William is sleepy. ". Buffy helped him up when she led him to the bed and she placed him under the covers. He shook as she crawled under the covers with him and held him. His head rested against her as he shook and whimpered and she kissed his hair. It took a long time for either of them to go to sleep as she held him and tears rolled down her cheeks. ----------------------------- She was in the white room. Spike was curled into a ball as his back face her and she gently touched him. Spike jumped when he rolled over and looked over at her. " Why didn't you ever tell me? ". " Because it was my business. That and I thought I'd gross you out more then you already were. ". " When did she start doing that? ". " When I was two. It was just a fun game at first. She'd playfully touch me and I'd giggle. It wasn't until I grew older that it got sick. She wouldn't let me tell anyone. You didn't talk about that in those days. It was a big secret. ". " When did she stop? ". " She didn't. Not until I died. I thought I was free of it. Thing was, funny though, I loved her. She was my mum. Bloody hell. She was sick, in more ways then that, and I even... ". " What? ". " ...I sired her. I know! It was sick, but, I still loved her. She was my mum! Then she changed. That demon inside her taunted me with our dark secret. So, I staked her. Put her to rest. Thing is, I still feel her inside me. Like we're still playing. I feel dirty. ". Buffy reached to touch him when he turned over and sat up. She saw the anger in his eyes as she pouted and he tilted his head to one side. " Don't. ". " Hey, you think you're the only one with a dysfunctional family!? Let me tell you something! My parents got divorced and I thought it was MY fault! That my being the slayer was the reason! I got this bullshit about them having problems but it didn't matter! My father just left! Do you think he gave a fuck about us!? No! I run away from home and does he go looking for me!? No! Mom gets sick and does he even call asking about her after I leave message after message!? No! She dies and does he even come to the funeral!? No! I die and does he even come for Dawnie!? No! Sunnydale goes booooooooooooooooom and does he even try to see if his daughters are all right!? No! He doesn't care! ". " It's not the same thing! ". " So!? We both have shits for parents! Lets drop it! ", she said as he looked at her then reached for her. Buffy crawled into his arms when he held her and she felt him breathing. He gently kissed her as she smiled and he brushed the hair out of her eyes. " I'll keep your secret if you keep mine! ", he said with a smile as she gently punched him and he nuzzled her neck. She nodded as he held her but neither looked at the window as Angel paced then growled tossing a mug at the wall. --------------------------------------------------------------------- --------- ---------------------------------- Angel watched the blood trickle down the wall when Eve walked inside and stood at the center of the office and looked at him. " What!? ". " The amulet went off. We traced it to somewhere in London. ". " Well, that's a start. ". " Yeah. If this keeps up, we might find him before The Head Office decides to downsize you! ". Eve left the office as he looked at the report and crumbled it up tossing it to the floor. " Right. ". |
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