| The Lord called me into Pastoral Work years ago after I became a christian, He taught me a great deal and I want to share some of it with you now. Matthew 25.36 "I was sick and you took care of me, I was in prison and you visited me." I visited serveral people who suffered from Alzheimer's, many could not carry on a conversation, but as I sat with them and held their hand I would feel Gods presence with me. I knew He wanted me to communicate with these people and make them feel relaxed and calm around me. One lady would cling to my hand and talk with me, at times I would hear her say her name, other times I could not understand anything she said, the important thing was to be wtih them and try to lisetn, let them talk even if it does not make any sense to you at the time. I learned the importance of touch, a lot of people in nursing homes rarely get touched, they love attention and time given to them, they never pass up hugs, hand holding.etc. I used to think when there was silence I had to speak and say something, even if it does not fit the situation, but in time the Lord taught me talking is sometimes unnecessary. I am a very outgoing person who likes to smile a lot and laugh lots. I would come into the nursing home smiling whether I felt like it or not, I would start up a conversation right away, thinking that was the best thing to do. In time God taught me differently. I learned from my church to pray a lot before I visit anyone. When dealing with people in pain, whether it be emotional or physical pain, words are not always neeeded. My spirit is sometimes loud, I love being with people and I would feel joy as I started visiting whether they felt it or not. What is needed is a quiet, compassionate, gently spirit, this seems to ease fear, anxiety and pain. The words spoken by Gods Holy Spirit seem to calm, settle, ease and slow or decrease pain. A soothing voice is important, these are the qualities I need to pray for as they do not come naturually. Taken from a devotional, "Caring or Talking" A man's wife died, the pastor saw him for coffee the day after her funeral. Usually I gave him lots of advice, this day I felt to just sit and listen. Let him talk out his feelings. An hour later the husband looked at me and he said you really heard me. Thank you for not just talking religion and telling me what I should do. You are listenting and caring about what has happened to me. It took 30 yrs. tolearn what Jesus meant - give people what they need - food for the hungry, cold water for the thirsty, clothes for the naked, and I heard him say to me - a loving ear rather then advice for someone in emotional pain. Becoming Gods instrument (vessel) of help 2Cor.1 3-7 he uses comfort 10 times in this passage. The Holy Spirit is our comforter or Helper. Hurting people are quick to sense when our hearts are not in it. God is essentially the comforter. In order to be effective in this ministry, you must be living in close fellowship with God. An effective ministry begins with prayer l. The prayer of preparation 2. The prayer of direction 3. The prayer of intercession A caring ministry begins in prayer, is sustained by prayer and succeeds by prayer. Ministry attempted by any other approach quickly becomes an activity of the flesh and is doomed to failure. We are to be Gods instruments of blessing, there must be contact. we are to be His hands, His feet, His voice. God can use us as his ministers of mercy. We have to be careful we do not approach people too aggressively, We need to build a freindship with gentleness and caution, this may take time. Invite people to your home and open a door. We need strength daily from God to minister to others. You may get discouraged and want to give up, draw strength from God Himself. Make sure you prepare yourself before you contact people. Learn to listen to what people are not saying, listen for feelings. Pray a little prayer before reaching out to a person, say Lord help me, tell me what to say to this person, guide me, enable me. Study the hurting person to determine what they need. Everyone does not want to be comforted as we may want to be. Proverbs 16.24 Plesant words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul, and healing to the bones. Continue praying for the people God puts in your life to reach out to. Continue to ask God to show you their needs and how you can minister to them so that you can be His instrument of mercy and comfort.Isa. 40.1 Comfort, comfort my people. The Lord tells us to bear one anothers burdens, this does not mean that I have to solve all their problems, it does mean we are to sympathize with their pain, recognize what you can and cannot do for this person and accept your limits. Pray for them and let them know you are thinking about them. We are to reach out to others, especially the sick, oppressed, hurting as Jesus did. A priest who spends much time counselling the bereaved has seen inner healing take place in many people when they were able to express their grief and anger openly without criticism. Both the people who are dying and the families must be free to express ALL their negative feelings and emotions. Listen to what is being said and the events being related. Give your full attention to the person who is speaking. Listen to the feelings expressed. Listen to the needs being expressed. Understand by putting yourself in the other persons shoes. You don't need to solve the problems or feel quilty, you can listen without guilt, you can try to understand what is going on with the other person without coming up with the answers. I do not have the power to make anything all better for anyone. I am not responsible for solving the problems of everybody else. Here are some things to say when you are in a difficult situation with someone you are reaching out to or visiting: That would hurt I'm sorry that happened to you What a difficult position to be in That is awful I don't blame you one bit I feel like crying What a good idea Thats a tough spot to be in Oh my goodness Tell me more Here are a few questions you can ask them: How do you feel about that? What would you like to do? What do you think might work What was that like? Did that hurt your feelings? How could you stand that? These were just a few of the things the Lord taught me about Pastoral Care.. |
| WHAT GOD TAUGHT ME ABOUT PASTORAL CARE |
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