Blood Runs Deep
They flew without speech for the better part of an hour. Close beside his lover, and just a little bit behind, he could see Trunks' shoulders trembling. Looking at his face all he saw was a plane of worried lines. Twice Goten reached out to calm the other but each time he was flinched away from.
Meanwhile Trunks was miserable. His chest fluttered each time he thought back to the table. Conflicting feelings of confusion and desire clouded his thoughts. So instead of that he thought back to how this whole thing had started. Vegeta had held him down helpless and just kept staring at Trunks like he had. It was his eyes he finally decided, his eyes and that sweaty guy smell that had done him in. And then.....then that had almost happened and he knew for certain that no desire yet existed in his heart to touch Vegeta hat way. That had been to much, and finally prompted his rude flight from the window.
He recalled with guilt his actions after he deserted Goten. He had stayed in flight, very aware of what these past events had done to the condition in his pants. Oh how awful the tears had been, whipping across his cheeks to reveal his shame over the whole dreadful thing. Disturbed, he had landed in a wood's clearing and dropped on his side. As Trunks snuggled his hands between his knees the full realization of what happened had struck him. Remembering his father's piercing gaze he squirmed, trying to escape the wrongness he felt. But even as he moved he knew that ignoring his sensitive state was not an option.
Bracing himself against his wicked thoughts he pulled down his pants and found some relief. As his fingers tickled and stroked, he thought back to waking up restrained.
It had been frightening.
Now he wept again, remembering what had almost been forced upon him. Oh God, of all the sick messed up things to do.....
If only-he thought for pleasure's sake-if only Vegeta had grabbed him or something, touched him in some way. He had to admit that unconsciously, his brain had been hoping for something like that. And if it had happened, damn, who knows what he would've done. Trunks kissed his shoulder to release a sudden passion. That might have felt good.
Ah hell. His hand started a rhythm and he imagined himself pinned again. He willed this fantasy pleasure-person with his father's face to hold Trunks' wrists with his feet. Then pleasantly warm hands would slide under his shirt, giving his nipples a firm twist.
He cried out. Any treatment of his nipples tickled a fetish and drove him wild. He definitely would have liked that.
God, Trunks was ashamed at what happened then. He had envisioned Vegeta pinning him helpless and letting his hands wander freely. This fantasy-Trunks released moans of laughter until hot breath warmed his legs. Looking down he watched as he was sucked and moved his hand faster over himself. In this enjoyable dream he was sucked till he cummed and cried out in the grass as he did. That orgasm had been so intense he didn't know how to remember it. It had just been.....incredible.
And then what had he done? Then he had hid like a coward in the forest. All the rest of the day he'd concealed his ki from Goten, not wanting the boy or his father to find him. He lost himself to a pointless and time-consuming deer hunt.
Still embarrassed to the point of blushing by what he'd done he followed Goten down towards an island's sandy beach. It was exactly where they had shared their first kiss. Their coming here was only done to talk over serious matters, and never taken lightly. Goten wanted to talk he supposed, and Trunks had a brief feeling of what he thought was unwarranted guilt.
They sat down on the sand and it was as if they were headed here all along. Staring at his friend's windswept hair, he tried to imagine cheating on Goten. He couldn't. The thought was an impossibility in his mind; he just couldn't fathom the desire. And that's one of the reasons this stuff with Vegeta confused him so much. Aside from the fact that he didn't know what to make of it all, he wondered if it counted as cheating on Goten.
Words and logic told him however, that the truth of the matter was that he had done nothing wrong. That first time he definitely had no choice. But then this morning left him feeling guilty as hell. Guilt over the openness he had displayed with his body, and guilt over liking it so much. But then again, if he had refused the advances, Vegeta probably would have insisted; he would have had to do it anyway. He concluded that escape hadn't been an option and his only sin had been enjoying something he had no say in. Sick, but not unfaithful.
He looked at the waves and remembered how good it had felt when he had cummed thinking of Vegeta, and the excitement he had felt at breakfast. These thoughts fought with the ones that couldn't stand his baby being mad at him even for a moment. Concern for Goten won out and he turned towards his love.
"I'm sorry." He meant it sincerely in more ways than one.
"For whatever I did to make you angry. I can't stand it when you're angry with me Goten. It's because of yesterday, isn't it?"
"Yes that and the day before when you dumped me on the floor and took off."
"That was rude of me, I'm really very sorry." Goten nodded stiffly.
"Did you get a bruise?" Trunks playfully checked underneath his waistband.
"It's not funny!" says Goten slapping his hand away. "I was really worried, okay?"
Trunks was startled by the sharpness in his voice. Looking at his feet he
wished he had something to say to that but he didn't.
Real quietly Goten asked, "It was Vegeta, wasn't it?"
Trunks turned wary eyes on the other. "What?"
Goten saw the nerve he'd hit and backed off. "Never mind. You don't have to say."
There was a long pause.
"Yeah," Trunks finally said. "It was him."
Goten listened with growing anger as Trunks talked, never taking his eyes from the ocean. Goten was quite sure at that moment that he hated Vegeta.
"I hated it when he used to tease me till I cried. I don't know what his problem was, he just always seemed to hate me for some reason. Even when I began to fight with him as a super saiyan, as an equal, he still treated me like dirt if not worse. He hardly ever I just can't stand it!" Unbeknownst to Trunks he struck Goten's knee. "GOD he pisseds me off! He thinks he's so much better than me, like he's so above everyone ya know? It just gets to me ya know?"
Goten nodded and smoothed sand from Trunks' arm.
"That bastard, I think he enjoys making me mad."
"He's an asshole." Trunks looked away. "Your father yes, but still an asshole."
Frowning, Goten watched his beloved's beautiful face turn to hate. As casually as he could he asked, "Are you in any danger now?"
As soon as he said it he wished he hadn't. Because once he did Trunk's emotions slid off his face leaving a concealing mask in their place.
The discussion was over.
"No, I'll be fine." Goten breathed in deeply and thought about how much he loved this boy in front of him, and how much he'd like to kill Vegeta for ever hurting him. He was so glad they were together. There had never been any tension between them, or unspoken feelings. They had always just--been.
He wished there was some way he could reach out and make this all okay. He wished he had the power to change people so he could make Vegeta a better person, but he could not. All he wanted was for Trunks to feel alright again, and for him to feel that way he needed his father's acceptance. The only way he knew to help was just to be there as a shoulder to lean on.
Happy in his love for Trunks he leaned over and kissed his cheek. Trunks smiled and closed his eyes, then turned towards Goten, expectant. He wasn't disappointed and practically purred when Goten gave butterfly kisses to his neck. Trunks loved that. Hands wandering, he nudged Trunks onto his back and proceeded to give him a nice ol' hickey. Finishing with a nip, he went for those lips. God he tasted good, and God how he loved the taste of Trunks.
They kissed and touched and rubbed and fondled. After a good deal of that if you were to look down on the pair you would have seen the following: A black-eyed boy with funny spiked hair of the same color tensing his muscles as he deeply rode the other from behind.
The other's hair was purple and touched with sweat and his blue eyes were open and troubled. Passion-glazed-yes; but he had the look of one who wished he wasn't doing what he was doing. And he looked sad.
Afterwards they twined about each other and let the sun warm their pulses back to normal. They decided they could take the scenic route-the very scenic route-and still make it for half a day of classes. So off they went, neither having a complete understanding of the situation.
* * *
"And does anyone know why the snags should remain untouched?" Trunks gave up paying attention to the biology lesson. His mind was elsewhere and his stomach pleasantly warm as he thought back to breakfast. Eyes closed and smiling faintly, he sought again the sensation of that foot against him. He could almost feel his leg being caressed again.
He allowed himself to enjoy these thoughts for a few more minutes then turned his attention back to doodling. He saw with dismay that he had scratched Vegeta's profile on his desk. Frowning, he out-lined it with a heart. Then he drew Goten and outlined him as well. After a moment he added a B for Bulma next to Vegeta, and a T for his own name by Goten, each person with their respective mate. This is how it should be, he thought with resolution and set down the pencil. But moments later he found himself connecting the "T" and Vegeta by squiggly little lines.
Trunks looked at his hand, and wondered why he'd done that. He didn't know. Resting his forehead on folded arms, he contemplated the situation. He wished he didn't have these feelings, he really did! All he wanted was to banish them forever. But the horniness he felt over all that happened and might happen wouldn't let him forget. Instead he found himself anticipating, fantasizing even over a third encounter. Perhaps while sparring.....
But what would Goten think if he knew all this? Keeping something from that kid was never easy. This thought caused him to consider his own mental health. What kind of pervert gets off on his father? Why would he...was he...even considering this? But then again, how could he really resist it? He had to be honest with his feelings, that he knew.
Only problem with that was Goten. His best friend before lover, the thought of betraying him raised questions all over again. Goten was the one he wanted to share his life with. No other could take that roll. But he loved his father, and wanted him in his life too. So why not share his body? Enjoying each other in this particular manner could bring them closer together as father and son. Vegeta might even learn to love him. How could Goten get upset over that? Male bonding with his father? Surely that was okay?
He should not participate in this.
But should not and doing it anyway were two very different things. On the one hand, it was wrong. But on the other, his father was finally showing him some love and respect. This was a good thing. Whatever did or didn't happen from here.......the fact couldn't be changed that Vegeta was finally paying attention to him.
He sighed, grappling with unsettling feelings.
Thinking of Vegeta's eyes, Trunks closed his own and went back again to breakfast.
Part Four |