So unless, shit changes, and I mean now, in respect for attitude towards me, then the friendship can go on but the buck stops here.
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Feburary, 2, 2004 | |
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| I have a big problem with being under appreciated. No one, and I mean NO ONE works harder than me. Take school, 23 hours + 25hrs at bull shit costco? Are you kidding me. Oh and lets not forget those fucking poor hygene evil doing, iresponsible, broke and it's their fault family I have to live with. So this brings me to this point. I like virginia. Virginia [VA] is really cool, nice, fun to be around, good looking etc. But I posed the question like this,me: "so are we like dating now? Can I call you my girlfriend?" her response: "We're not going out, we're really not dating we're just.....i don't know." So yea, that pisses me off. And lets clarify this from the get go. This is not a sexual frustration thing. I'm not fucking her and i'm cool with that. I enjoy the time spent with her fully. I'm not expecting anything from her and I don't see that I'm investing anything in her with two exceptions. Time and Money. Time, ok my work load speaks for itself. Ask yourself how much time I have. Money: There is a big difference between not having money and being poor. Being poor is owing money to a lot of people do to your iresponsibility with the exceptions of being in debt because of needs. ie; school medical bills, etc. Not having money is not having money. If you can afford the things you need but can't get the things you want that makes you a human in the US of A. My point? Dinner and movies and all those fun things people do....they aren't free. (obvious response) "no one is forcing you to pay for them" This is true, but my point is if we are both spending this much time with each other and an attraction is obviously there, the least you can do is a)show some appreciation and b) decide what the hell we're doing. And see women can be such bitches when they pretend that guys don't have to pay for them. I mean what the fuck. A guy takes you out to dinner and ask for two checks. You find me a woman who isn't going to take that as a diss. And explain to me as a guy how you can demonstrate that you want to be close(er) to someone and not pay for shit. NO FUCKING WAY. There are exceptions but in this case there is no ambiguity. It is clear what I'm attempting to establish. No, you don't have to decide if you want to marry me. Thats not what I'm asking. But if you feel like you want to continue this way and it's been a couple of weeks and several dates then you should say something to the effect of, "well, ok, lets be a little more real about this. I see us as together now." or I don't see us as together and we're not going to be that way...WHICH.... If thats the case then we can be friends we can hang out talk whatever but your money is your money you spend it on you and i'll spend my money on me. I sound like such a fucking douche bag but come on. We're passed the point of we're just seeing each other. It is to the point where it is clear one person in this relationship has some clear idea of what they are doing (or not doing) and the other is being dragged on like a damn fool. Thats my two cents. And it is tuff. Hey we all walk into relationships with someone we are attracted to knowing full and well the chances of shit working out are slim to none. But you don't act like it and you sure's hell don't through it in the other persons face. People grow together the minute the meet. Kind of like on the SIMS like as soon as you meet someone they go on your people list and you interaction meter begins to change. Thats just how life is. (that game is crazy real!) I am really feeling like an asshole here but I'm feeling more like i'm being made a fool out of. And i'm no fool. When I'm with my people I give them much more than my time. They have me, i'm there and my mind isn't somewhere else. I don't know....maybe it's just me. I don't know how to treat people in any other way than the way they treat me. That goes for the both ying and the yang. So unless, shit changes, and I mean now, in respect for attitude towards me, then the friendship can go on but the buck stops here. |
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