Emails
(a collection of moments)
Whenever I check my email I hope that I'll have a new email from my Norweigan friend "Kitty". She paints such vivid pictures, and has such a fantastic turn of phrase when she writes. This page contains snippets from her mails She only asks:"don't poke fun at me or anything." So let's laugh with her...
*NEW* The medium of textmessaging has allowed more mentalism!
Mark - IN THE DARK, EATING SOME BARK, BEING STARK (NAKED, BUT DOES NOT RIME), WISH HE WAS CALLED CLARK (CAUSE THEN HE COULD CHANGE INTO A
BLUE SUITE IN A PHONE BOX), DANCING IN THE DARK....? (ALREADY USED DARK....EH---SHIT)
i had a coffe today as well, and feel sick. is that normal? from coffe?
do you know?
K.
p.s i heard some weird news the other day, but since i cannot remember
them i cannot tell you. but it was something really weird.
>Why the fuck would you try sending me a virus?
>Fuckwit.
>Mark
FUCKWIT YOURSELF!!!BOZO!
YOU CHRISTMAS TREE YOU!
ROTTEN PRAWN!
MUD!
SAND!
FLOWERDUST!
SPRING WIND!
YOU!
DOH!
ever read anything by James Ellroy or Peter Straub? where's the best place to get books from the internet? CDs? MP3 files? AG3? coke? space shuttles? banana republics? (I need to buy a country in order to do some laundry....nudge, nudge...)
K.
worst thing happens, though. last weekend blood were floating and I was in a pireate taxi i should not have been in.
but that's a different story.
how's life in general?
K.
I dyed my hair today, brown. Its nice, my mom likes it - now she wants me to cut it as well, she'll pay for it so I guess I should go for it.
I bought fancy shoes today as well, on sale (miss sixty/suxties...?) the bloke who sold them to me was sexy. Of course I came across as mad woman....one foot was sice 37 the other one 38 and I was stressed and fell on my arse and shit...but hey...he offered me cheap cloathes
though...50% but by then I was so worked up I had 'several important things to take care off...' ahhhh....
I have to go now and eat pancaces...the phone rang and I opicked up the wrong one and it went off and shit....
....and my head is all foggyi..like I'm in some parrallell world inside my head...You know; foggy state.
I don't know when I'm going back.
I'm stressed and bored...
Oh...pancaces.
K.
>Have fun
................? SOMETIMES MARK....FUN? IN THIS WORLD? BOMBS AND SUBARINES
GOING DOWN AND FUCK KNOWS WHAT NOT! SOON THE SEAGULLS WILL EXPLODE IN THE AIR! AND SKY SCRAPERS WILL PEOPLE THE EARTH. AND EVERYTHING WILL BE DARK.
FROM THIS, THE GREEN GOAT WORKING AT SAINSBURY'S SHALL EMERGE. HE WILL TELL RIGHT FROM WRONG AND MICE FROM RATS AND THERE WILL NEVER BE ANY PROBLEMS WITH THE NATIONAL BUDGET EVER AGAIN!
THERE WILL BE SHOES FOR ALL! AND GLACED APPLES! AND EVERYBODY WILL BE HAPPY AND DANCE. WHILE MICHAEL JACKSON IS SINGING....BAD...MEANS BATHROOM IN NORWEGIAN...IT'S A WET ROOM. BUT HAS NO GREEN MEN FROM SAINSBUTY'S IN IT. 'CAUSE HE'S IN ENGLAND MAKING ROCKING CHAIRS. THESE CHAIRS ARE GOING TO BE ON SALE ON WEDNESDAYS, AFTER THEY HAVE BEEN PAINTED PINK!
I LOVE PINK!
BORED?
I AM.
BYE, K.
Just got a phone call from the photo shop...they're pricks, but finally they managed to do something right. I bought a camera and they were out of bags (this was in July,it was supposed to take a week...which it did not)...AND that STUPID girl working there...Christ all mighty! that one braincell was working overtime! This bloke on the phone got a bit nervous and started stottering, but he managed to tell me that I'm getting my bag - and I was smiling down the receiver; the polite customer odwn to the finger tips.)
Get mad; - make things happen! Oh.. the stories I could have told you about my golden days....
I know, I'm going to be one off those old bitces when I'm old, complaining about everything 'Young man...LISTEN UP RIFF-RAFF I'M TALKING TO YOU!!!!!!!!!' Just like that.
ah...
and you'll be this mad, groumpy old man running down all the nurses in your wheel chair,playing your music too loud, shouting 'My friend' while rolling down the stairs: senile as pottery!
ah....
can you wait?
K.
10 September
you should go to www.startsiden.no and thenn 'humor' (+ try your luck from there)you wount understand shit, it's norwegian, but its cool).
I've don the usual calculations and came to the (also) usual conclution: exchange rates sucks, they are trying to force me into a spagetti and cheese diet. bastards. exchecker man;up yours!
I've been to a marked today (an animal one, but without the animals - I guess it is the modern tims(the ones Dickens wrote about). anyway; I bought a russian box. its nice.
K.
13 September
we tried some sushi. never tried it before, and very difficult to eat. today I thougth it gave me stomack pain, but I am not sure. It might be that i think it will make me sick and thenn it does,
or,
you know.
K.
19 September
or is it beer? Me think so. /(I found a bear in a booooooooootle, got to rub it the right way. Yeah!)
I'm going to play Bingo tomorrow. I've wanted to do that for a looong time, and finally the day has arrived.
I'm gonna look at those numbers and winn me a million or two, or perhaps just a basket of fruit; anyway I*'ll proove to the world that I am a winner.
Who needs the olympics anyway? HA!
the Champion to be;
K.