This list was compiled over a few weeks in the summer of 2005 by the women on The Knot's Second Weddings Board. They are things that it's NORMAL to think/feel/hear as an "encore bride." Read it, think about it and post it somewhere prominent to remind yourself just how NORMAL you really are. If you're a soon to be step-monster, see the Blended Family Edition too.
It's normal to feel guilty that you are having a second wedding.
It�s normal to feel scared to commit again.
It�s normal to have some doubts.
It�s normal to worry that your credibility is in question since you vowed "forever" once before (but it is important to know that your credibility is NOT actually in question, because things change).
It�s normal to question whether or not you should take his name.
It�s normal to worry about what others think.
It�s normal to read the etiquette posts and want to cry.
It�s normal to WANT to have the wedding of your dreams for the man of your dreams.
It�s normal to want all the cheesey things first brides get:)
It�s normal to be more scared of moving in and combining your belongings than it is to get married.
It�s normal to put up walls.
It's normal NOT to have the support of every family member.
It's normal to want to "connect" with other 2nd timers.
It's normal to "test" him ... again and again.
It's normal to think at first - we don't deserve certain things.
It's normal to cry/be upset when reminded of the first failure.
It's normal to keep putting things off (that guilt thing again).
It's normal to have issues when kids are involved.
It's normal to feel like you have the letter " D " on your forehead.
YES, it's normal to be HAPPY and EXCITED when you're ready to accept it!
It�s normal to have heightened anxiety.
It�s normal to overanalyze every single comment he makes, about you, your kids, your future, your wedding...looking for the cue that it�s going to fall apart.
It�s normal to partition off those parts of you that were hurt the worst in the past, and be cautious about being vulnerable to him.
It�s normal to look up waiting for the other shoe to drop.
It�s normal to sometimes just find yourself smiling again.
It�s normal to have just learned the definition of healthy (no matter how old you are).
It�s normal to need to go to therapy.
It�s normal to be a control freak.
It�s normal to not be good at asking for help.
It�s normal for you to feel like you have to keep your excitement a secret.
It�s normal to be afraid to lose the BEST thing that has happened to you in a very long time.
It�s normal to wake up at night, look at him, and be amazed he's there.
It�s normal to want a GUARANTEE that he will not be taken from you by some freak event.
It is normal to feel uncomfortable, but grateful, when your family/friends want to throw parties/showers to celebrate your happiness.
It is normal to be pleasantly surprised when FI does not act/respond like DH did.
It is normal to feel bad that you get two weddings and some of your good friends have not had one yet.
It is normal to obsess about your dress and wonder if it is "appropriate" enough, but realize that sackcloth and ashes for you would not match with tuxes and pretty dresses for everyone else!
It is normal to not have something (garter, bouquet toss, etc.)for your second wedding just because you had it for your first.
It is normal to worry about your child(ren) getting enough love and attention since you now have FI.
It's normal to want your family to be just as happy this time as the last time!
It's normal to cut and paste this into a document that you can refer to daily, just to remind yourself of exactly how normal you are!
It's normal to worry what his family specifically thinks of you, your kids, your parenting style, whatever.
It's normal to wonder if he's for real because he's just SO perfect for you and your family.
It's normal to question your wedding dress or to buy two, three, four...
It's normal to have thoughts/nightmares of your ex-husband or to wonder if you�re doing the right thing because you were in love with him at one time, too. This is our way of dealing with and learning from our past.
It's normal to be happy and excited one day and crying and pessimistic the next! This too shall pass.
