Dear Friend,

In anger and desperation, I found the strength of will to walk away from a relationship I had thought was untenable, only to find that the alternative, a life without our friendship, was unbearable. So I returned and you were there. That you were there waiting, hoping, no longer surprised me.

I erred in gifting you with a love that your lifestyle and conduct had not earned you but emotions are not easily controllable. Although I have no regrets, I must learn not to yearn for you as my soulmate but rather to love you only as the friend that you are. Now, though I still care for you enough to live with your choices, to accomodate your lifestyle, I must also temper the intensity of the relaionship to allow for my needs, to protect my heart.

Our friendship has never been well defined, is still not clearly delineated, but it is strong in its foundation, tenacious and binding in its nature. I don't think that either of us will ever be able to precisely define the parameters of this relationship. Maybe the answer is simply to keep the friendship flexible to the needs of the moment, pliable to both our desires, letting the boundaries expand and recede as necessary, while the underlying groundwork remains firm with the strength of our affection, with the caring we have for one another.

Bn.